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Does this sound fair to you?

post #1 of 12
11/23/09 at 6:27pm
Thread Starter 
Our company has changed insurance companies yet again (3 times in 3 years). A slight increase but no biggie...for us. I had to bring in my marriage license to prove that we were married so DH would be covered. A girl I work with has lived with her boyfriend for 13 years and has had him on her insurance the entire time she's worked there (over 7 years). This insurance won't cover them because they aren't legally married....but WILL cover a partner if they are gay/lesbian or over age 65. To me, that is just not fair. I mean, 13 years should be common law. Her boyfriend has an independant photo buisness that is actually quite successful, but they can't afford the private insurance. They are offering Cobra but that is outrageous. I told her to just go to the court house and get it done with. It's amazing what a little piece of paper can do.

I mean, I think it's great that they are offering it for gay couples, but I think this is discriminatory. What do you think?
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post #2 of 12
11/23/09 at 7:04pm
The reason they're offering it for gay couples is gay couples generally (and presumably in your state) can't go down to the courthouse and get that magical piece of paper. If they don't want to go through the ceremony for whatever reason (damn those pesky vows?), in some states they can get a state-registered common-law marriage, which also counts for insurance and stuff.
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post #3 of 12
11/23/09 at 7:50pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ebrillblaiddes View Post
The reason they're offering it for gay couples is gay couples generally (and presumably in your state) can't go down to the courthouse and get that magical piece of paper. If they don't want to go through the ceremony for whatever reason (damn those pesky vows?), in some states they can get a state-registered common-law marriage, which also counts for insurance and stuff.
Maryland doesn't recognize common law marriages in Maryland, but they DO recognize common law marriages established in other states (go figure. BTW, I live in WV but she and her boyfriend live in Maryland). I can understand the "going to the court house" argument, but I can't find what documentation needs to be submitted to prove that they are a gay/lesbian couple. My supervisor is male and has had the same male roommate (strictly sharing an apartment) for 4 years....he said "well, I can add my roommate to my insurance since we are both male and live together". What documentation COULD be provided for gay/lesbian couples?
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post #4 of 12
11/23/09 at 8:05pm
In Oregon couples are only required to register their domestic partnerships by completing the form and giving it to their employer. A domestic partnership can be a man and woman, two women or two men. The state does discriminate against man and woman couples in the manner in which the benefits are taxed, but they do offer them equally.

Added... I'm going to have to check this out. The employer form I've seen and the state form don't look the same. And I don't think the employer forms are filed with the county. (which they indicate the same sex couples have to be) So... it may be the employers here that are offering this benefit to everyone, which would explain why they are taxed differently.
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post #5 of 12
11/23/09 at 9:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by ebrillblaiddes View Post
The reason they're offering it for gay couples is gay couples generally (and presumably in your state) can't go down to the courthouse and get that magical piece of paper.
Exactly what I was thinking
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post #6 of 12
11/24/09 at 4:37pm
Exactly - my company offers coverage for gay/lesbian couples, as do most of the Fortune 500, since they cannot marry legally at this point. Heterosexuals can.

There is a list of documentation required of non-heterosexual couple. Heterosexual couples just have to provide a marriage license.

What's not fair, IMO, is that civil marriage for straight, gay, and lesbian couples is not the law of the land yet.
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post #7 of 12
11/24/09 at 11:32pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by darlili View Post
What's not fair, IMO, is that civil marriage for straight, gay, and lesbian couples is not the law of the land yet.
Personally, I think the government should drop the "marriage" language entirely and just make it civil unions for everyone. I mean, "until death do us part" for example is really not part of the legal definition of marriage any more; it's "for as long as we both shall feel like it, or at least prefer it to the alternative" which is just a contract like any other.
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post #8 of 12
11/27/09 at 2:02pm
I've never had to produce a marriage license to prove I was married to have my DH covered on the insurance - it seems a bit extreme to me require that. I guess if the insurance companies can figure out ways to deny coverage, they will.
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post #9 of 12
11/27/09 at 7:00pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misty8723 View Post
I've never had to produce a marriage license to prove I was married to have my DH covered on the insurance - it seems a bit extreme to me require that. I guess if the insurance companies can figure out ways to deny coverage, they will.
I never had to either with any of the other insurance companies we've dealt with. I thought it was a bit extreme too. Thank god I knew where it was! lol...it's always a mad dash to find anything in my house. Everything is filed under "miscellanious".

Cinder, does Oregan recognize common law marriage and is that the same as a domestic partnership? What kind of proof do they need (as in joint income tax forms for so many years) or is it just a form that they fill out and sign? I'm just curious...

As I said, I am glad they are offering to gay/lesbian couples and I DO believe they sould be able to form a civil union in the eyes of the state. I still say that this is discriminatory though for this company since she has been able to carry her boyfriend for years on her insurance and this is the first company that has denied that (and just started to from what I learned this week...they are based in CA so it may be backlash).
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post #10 of 12
11/29/09 at 11:36am
In the past year, my employer has required proof. In fact, earlier this year (outside of open enrollment even), they required proof that the person you claim as your spouse is actually your spouse. I can't remember what the requirements were for those who claimed a same-sex domestic partner.

I think it's going to become VERY common for insurance companies or employers to ask for proof in this economy. It was very easy to fraud my employer until this requirement.
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post #11 of 12
11/29/09 at 8:26pm
So much about health insurance here in the US does not seem fair or reasonable to me.
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post #12 of 12
11/30/09 at 6:12am
learn something new everyday...

Most younger couples I inform are quite shocked to learn - common-law in Canada is now 12 months living together in a commited relationship!!!
(It has to do with protecting immigrants).

Although Ontario seems to be a little different and requires 3 years, although quite frankly hubby & I still haven't sorted it out with revenue Canada yet - those guys are IDIOTS!!!!
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