wife won't let me bring in another cat !!

Hey all,

I want to bring in a two year old male cat, that i have been feeding since birth.

We have inside 5 female cats.

My wife says that the male is too old to bring inside he won't like it, and he is use to being outside. She also says that he will spray once he gets in, she says all males spray around females.

Is this true ? or is she just trying to stop me from getting a pet ??

Good for you for wanting to give a kitty a home! Are your girls spayed? Is your boy neutered? Those are the two primary questions that need to be answered. Once the answer to both questions is a resounding YES, then there are other more experienced people on this forum who can help you.

Yes, I agree. Neutering is the first step, as we wrote in the earlier thread.

You wrote earlier this boy was a timide, non aggressive tom. So he is prob being rather submissive, perhaps even withouth own territory, and thus - dont sprays or sprays very little. It will be even less aftery spaying. And IF he sprays, it will smell much lesser than with a fertile tom.

Besides, toms dont spray very much together with friendly females. Instead they spray mostly if they suspect a foreign tom is near.
Our studs for example did never sprayed when their ladies were visiting them. But they did sprayed when they felt a presence of toms outside, or other competitors.



But I think you may perhaps have a quite different problem. Your beloved is perhaps objecting not to him as such, but really against one more cat. 5 is quite many, a sixth with probably some initial problems is even more.
I think this is the key question here.

I think you must be diplomatic here. Make "a bit of horse-trading". Promise her something extra....or some compromise

Who is mostly responsible for the cats? Who cleans litter boxes, grooms them, cleans up any accidents, who feeds them? If most of this duty is on her, I can understand where she's coming from.

If these are your duties, than you have more room to work with her about it.

I have 4 female cats and 1 male cat, Billy was a stray and I brought him in, got him neutured and there have been no problems, he hasn't sprayed once and gets on with the girls great, infact he is a gentleman and waits for them to finish eating before he eats. The thing is I can't say this cat wil be the same as all cats react differently.x

Originally Posted by bszaronos

My wife says that the male is too old to bring inside (NO)

She also says that he will spray once he gets in, she says all males spray around females. (WRONG)

Is this true ? (NO) or is she just trying to stop me from getting a pet ??

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I brought inside a 5 year old feral male. He was neutered at age 5 right before I brought him inside. Never has he sprayed. He will not go near a door. I personally think that the cats that have lived outside are thankful to be inside. I now have 3 females and 4 males. No spraying.

I agree with the other posters in that he MIGHT be more likely to spray with unaltered cats in the house or an unaltered male. You have the best setup with all females to have good success bringing him inside.

What's her real issue with him coming inside? Does she take part in their daily care? Maybe you could talk with her about what she needs for him to come inside. Bargain, so to speak.

Good luck getting this guy in before the winter cold comes.

Originally Posted by Skimble

Maybe you could talk with her about what she needs for him to come inside.

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Jewelry maybe? or some other nice shiny item? That would be the - last ditch effort bribe.

I take in strays. They can be any age, I currently have a male who was neutered at ~2 and a female that was outside (though previously spayed). No spraying issues from either of them.

Well i sent my wife all the responses, but she still said NO...

On the plus side, he is well taken care of. He always has plenty of dry and wet cat food and water. We have the shed and a cat bed with hay inside. We also have a cat house with hay all inside that as well.

I will keep trying to get her to let him in, but i think having six cats is her limit.

That is more than many strays have. Get his vet care all taken care of and keep working on her. Try taking over more of the cat responsibilities that are already present, and maybe she'll soften up a bit. Good luck.

I think it's great you want to bring him in, and I hope that some day in the future that will be possible. But if you are feeding and caring for him and he has a safe warm spot, you can at least monitor him and watch over him. Maybe just let her warm up to the idea of another cat. I recently took in a 3 year old male who had lived outside at least 2 years. He has never sprayed and is just so grateful to be inside.

Originally Posted by strange_wings

That is more than many strays have. Get his vet care all taken care of and keep working on her. Try taking over more of the cat responsibilities that are already present, and maybe she'll soften up a bit. Good luck.

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Part of your "horse-trade" may perhaps be you are taking a still more active part also in the household works??...


Whooops, what did I said.... Now is the risk big you prefer to have that kitty outside....


Nay, I think you will want to have a male ally in this household with mostly girls...