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Nervous and depressed about cat show this weekend

post #1 of 34
9/4/09 at 7:44pm
Thread Starter 
Mom, Top Cat, and I arrived at the hotel last night. Tonight I went to a Royal Canin seminar and the pre show party at the show hotel. I felt soooooo out of place there. The reception was nice and all, but as I told mom when I came back, I just did not feel like I belonged there.

And on top of that, Top Cat isn't where I'd hope he'd be right now. He's fine personality wise - he did GREAT in the car, but right where the stitches were you could still see some pink. I almost canceled our trip because of his injury, but we had paid so much and I was stressed out by some major things at home (long, personal story) that I went to just get away anyway. But now I'm sad because I looked forward to this for at least a year, and here I am with everything going wrong.

I am so nervous and sad about tomorrow. I am afraid they will tell me to take him home or something of the sort. It hurts because it feels like I haven't been happy for a long time for not just Top Cat related reasons, but his circumstances haven't helped.

It doesn't help at all that early this year, I had planned a year in advance also to attend the Atlanta show, and then the cat I wanted to enter fell ill and passed away. It seems like I just can't have a good time.

Edit: Forgot to add that since I've been here, I've been deeply regretting my decision to bring him. I wanted so badly to have a good time. I guess I got greedy.
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post #2 of 34
9/4/09 at 7:55pm
aww - it's always hard when the expectation makes the experience seem not quite as special or nice - I hope you can relax and just enjoy having a cat with a great personality, who loves you, and a few days away from home with your mom and your kitty. I hope things look brighter in the morning.

It's hard when you're stressed, emotionally or physically - it can seem to suck all the joy out of life. You and Top Cat have my best wishes and prayers for a good weekend, and a happier year to come.
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post #3 of 34
9/4/09 at 8:09pm
Awww..... I am so sorry you feel this way.... Who knows what can happen tomorrow, right? what if something good happens? you never know!
for a fun and happy time!!!
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post #4 of 34
9/4/09 at 8:10pm
Good luck to you tomorrow and feel better.
Why do you feel out of place there?
You know I feel bad showing Cleo this sunday because it is the 4 yearAniv of my Smokey's death.
Are you going to see Tiberius?
He will be shipped out here the wee of Sept 14th it looks like.
I will be showing him at the October TICA show.
You do not know what the judges will say about his paw.
Do not feel bad for bringing him.
The pink is like a scar right.
If so it should be ok.
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post #5 of 34
9/4/09 at 8:34pm
Thread Starter 
thanks. we went to the water park today, but we left earlier than planned. I had a good time on several rides, but I was thinking too much about Top Cat to really enjoy as I wanted to. Also, Mom's medical condition (we found out that she's been getting tired more than usual because of an autoimmune condition) wore her out quickly. She offered to stay, but I wasn't feeling up to it either and so I left. Between her problems, family issues, and my working and going to school both full time, we have been just plain worn out on many levels.

Top Cat has been a mixed blessing lately. On the evening that he hurt himself, I was so depressed I almost did something I would certainly have regretted. So even though his injury (and me going broke as a result) brought me a lot of grief, I guess I have him to thank. My cats get on my nerves so much sometimes, but they also are part of what keeps me afloat emotionally and mentally. Sometimes when my depression gets deep, they're the ones that give me a reason to get on with my life. I am the only one in my family (except for my sister who got her cat acupuncture) that will go to the trouble that I have to keep them in top shape. Some days I feel that Luna and Top Cat eat better than I do. They eat top of the line cat food while I on the other hand eat, well, whatever crap is cheap and/or on sale.

Btw, I have a lot of school work to do this weekend. Going to a cat show is not a good excuse for the professors.
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post #6 of 34
9/4/09 at 8:45pm
Did you bring the school work with you?
If so you can try to do it at the hotel.
I hope everything gets better for you.
The show you are at sounds good.
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post #7 of 34
9/4/09 at 9:09pm
Thread Starter 
yes, I bought it with me. Two quizzes online that I couldn't afford to miss plus another assignment to turn in (I have two online classes). Looks like I will be spending downtime at the show working on the assignment. I am hoping that it will be worth it once I'm done because it is soooo much work. :P
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post #8 of 34
9/4/09 at 9:23pm
It will kill time in between rings.
I think you will be ok with Top Cat.
I found this on the TICA website.
Since they allow cats with problems Top Cas paw should be ok.
I hope he does well.
I am in the TICA MP group now and I have talked to a few people there.
They are telling me TICA is fun to show in.
I will be going to the TICA Aannual in Santa Clara next Sept.

Almost any cat can be shown. Minimum age is 4 months, there is no maximum. Almost all associations require that adult Household Pets (over 8 months) be altered. TICA allows declawed cats to be shown. TICA allows cats with physical handicaps, such as three legs or one eye, to be shown.
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post #9 of 34
9/4/09 at 9:25pm
Get some sleep tonight and then go into the show tomorrow with the idea that you're going to have fun. Don't even worry about how Top Cat will do. If nothing else, it will be a practice run for him. Then if he wins any ribbons it's a nice bonus. Besides, you'll get to see lots of gorgeous kitties. You can play the sympathy card as well, get hugs from all the people who feel sorry for you because your baby was injured.
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post #10 of 34
9/4/09 at 10:39pm
I'm sorry to hear that! I have had a show where I felt kinda like that, but it was because my cats were behaving badly. Of course it also had to be at the most expensive show I had been to as well...I felt kinda out of place too and then Church (my HHP) decided to get so grumpy in one ring that the judge asked me to take him out of the cage for them. Not only that but my other cat (my purebred) also hissed a few times and was not behaving either, and she was the only cat in her group so it was weird to go up to the rings and have the judges do a very short going-over and then give us a 1st place every time because she was the only cat! I ended up only putting Church in half the rings because the last one he was in the judge thought he was going to bite (he didn't and wouldn't, but he was NOT happy.) I ended up walking out of the show hall after that ring for a little while because I was so upset I was tearing up because I knew that would be my last cat show since both cats did not enjoy it. They had both been to several shows before and did well so I am not sure what the problem was, but that was the last show they entered.
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post #11 of 34
9/5/09 at 4:42am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nekochan View Post
I'm sorry to hear that! I have had a show where I felt kinda like that, but it was because my cats were behaving badly. Of course it also had to be at the most expensive show I had been to as well...I felt kinda out of place too and then Church (my HHP) decided to get so grumpy in one ring that the judge asked me to take him out of the cage for them. Not only that but my other cat (my purebred) also hissed a few times and was not behaving either, and she was the only cat in her group so it was weird to go up to the rings and have the judges do a very short going-over and then give us a 1st place every time because she was the only cat! I ended up only putting Church in half the rings because the last one he was in the judge thought he was going to bite (he didn't and wouldn't, but he was NOT happy.) I ended up walking out of the show hall after that ring for a little while because I was so upset I was tearing up because I knew that would be my last cat show since both cats did not enjoy it. They had both been to several shows before and did well so I am not sure what the problem was, but that was the last show they entered.
Sounds like what I went through with Luna. She no longer wanted to show. we even got permission to leave the show hall early since it was 7 hours away. I took her to one more show just to see if it was just that particular time, but after one more that was it. I was so sad especially since she was my only cat at the time. Hopefully, he will at least have a good time.
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post #12 of 34
9/5/09 at 5:03am
SF...Best of luck today! Just go and have fun. Enjoy watching all the beautiful cats! Buy yourself and your cats some neat stuff. You belong there just as everyone else! After all you have a cat that is entered! Don't worry about the scar. And remember there'll be more than one judge! No matter how TC does, it won't be the end of the world nor the very best thing ever. It's all about perspective. I have my first cat show tomorrow. I am excited but have a lot of unknowns too. I am going today just to check it all out and have a good time as a spectator! I have an HHP too. We're in this together. Let's just enjoy ourselves!!! Tell us how today goes!!!!
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post #13 of 34
9/5/09 at 8:03am
Back to hope that today has been going better. And you do have a ton on your plate, and it's only human to feel stressed and emotional with everything you've got going. I know this will sound like a cliche, but it has helped me with my mild depression - say thank you, aloud or in your mind, for five things that have gone ok that day - small things count, like your car working, your cat purring for you, a pretty sunrise, pretty toenails - anything!


And, I bet for most of us our darn cats eat better than we do - but you're a great kitty mom, and you're working hard and well toward a good future for yourself and your family, furry and otherwise. Pat yourself on the back for me - and best wishes to your mom - although I bet she feels herself blessed to have raised such a great child.

ETA - I admire all of your who show your cats, especially in the HHP rings - I'd be so nervous that someone who say anything 'bad' about my kitties - it takes a lot of strength to go into a new situation and make new acquaintances. You all rock!
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post #14 of 34
9/5/09 at 6:42pm
Thread Starter 
Well, TC did poorly today mostly. He was unusually grouchy. Relatively speaking the scar wasn't a big problem although it did not go unnoticed. He did get one ribbon 9th (out of 14 cats), but he was hissing a lot and gave the judges a hard time taking him out of the cage.

I was really upset today, but at least we went to dinner tonight. I am brokenhearted about the show experience though. I only have TC and Luna. Luna decided last year that she was done with showing. I am worried that TC is going down the path of Luna. If he won't show, I will have no one left. I will be so lost.
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post #15 of 34
9/5/09 at 7:37pm
I am sorry he acted bad.
Our you showing him tomorrow?
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post #16 of 34
9/5/09 at 7:55pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mews2much View Post
I am sorry he acted bad.
Our you showing him tomorrow?
I suppose so. We paid to stay until Monday so I might as well. I don't know what I'll do if he starts the day off the same way he did today.
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post #17 of 34
9/5/09 at 7:59pm
I hope he acts better tomorrow.
Was it because of the other cats.
Cleo hisses sometimes at the judges also but is because she is mad at the other cats.
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post #18 of 34
9/5/09 at 8:31pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mews2much View Post
I hope he acts better tomorrow.
Was it because of the other cats.
Cleo hisses sometimes at the judges also but is because she is mad at the other cats.

well in a couple of rings he got put next to a torbie male cat - pretty cat - that he just did not like (maybe he was jealous ). but he really did not like that cat. Finally, the cat's owner (who also happened to be a judge - just not at this show) offered to ask to have her cat moved. Apparently, male kittens get put in cages next to each other unlike adults where they will leave cages empty because there are so many boys. And to think I insisted on getting a boy because they usually are easier.
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post #19 of 34
9/5/09 at 8:47pm
It was a male cat both times that started Cleo off.
The first time it was a Tonkinese and the 2nd time a Siamese.
My Mentor told me to bring Vicks tomorrow or Vanilla just in case she hisses again.
Maybe you can try that.
The Tonkinese male was so bad that he did not even finish that show.
Cleo never hissed before that happened.
I will be showing a male Bengal.
Did you get to see Ty today?
Good luck tomorrow.
I will be showing Ty next month.
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post #20 of 34
9/5/09 at 11:13pm
Have you got Feliway spray or Rescue Remedy to give him? We can't use it in the show halls over here but I think Nial said you guys are allowed to over there.

Use the RR before the show, before he is unsettled.
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post #21 of 34
9/6/09 at 5:31am
Rescue Remedy can be used at the show (give him some in the morning). I had to do it with Jack the one show because the females in heat were making him act up.

Hopefully he will be ok and you can still show him in the future. And please note, that YOU can ask the clerk to separate the cats if they don't like each other and are upsetting the other cats. I've done it PLENTY of times - for the benefit of both cats!
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post #22 of 34
9/6/09 at 1:14pm
Well....I'm home from our first attempt too I know who I brought to the show...but I'm not sure who I brought to the RING...b/c she too was psychokitty! In the first ring she hissed and growled at the judge and was difficult to handle. She forgave her for being novice and gave her fifth of five shorthairs (specialty ring). Next our neighbor gave us some vanilla to put under her nose. It helped! She did much better in the second ring! She acted cute and played (she hissed a little too, but the judge really liked her). She got THIRD of ten!! (LH and SH all together). I was absolutely thrilled! THEN. Third ring. Not sure what was different...other than the judge and maybe different smells added. I had to come and get her out of the cage for him; but it was still all down hill from there....I finally just took her back to our set up. He didn't put her number down but I didn't bring her back. So then we tried a little bit of rescue remedy. It seemed to help, but not enough that I wanted to risk a repeat, so I pulled her from the last ring. Overall, she did great in her cage... she ate and drank and played with her toys (she didn't ONCE use the litterbox though--all day!!); she got lots of attention..and many compliments and everyone was really nice!!! I loved getting a third place. I can see how much fun it CAN be. Most of the people thought I should try again. I'm not sure. We'll see.
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post #23 of 34
9/6/09 at 1:20pm
Well a mixed day - but seems more positive then negative. I would show her again - but make it a month or two between times.
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post #24 of 34
9/6/09 at 2:45pm
Thread Starter 
well TC did a little better today and got two finals (one was 7 of 7 shorthairs so it was really a consolation prize). I am frustrated because he is my only show cat left (Luna is out of the question). I wanted to show him two weekends from now in SC and early next month in Hickory, NC, but I don't know if he'll want to show again or not. He was fine in the last show.
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post #25 of 34
9/6/09 at 3:26pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Starfish View Post
well TC did a little better today and got two finals (one was 7 of 7 shorthairs so it was really a consolation prize). I am frustrated because he is my only show cat left (Luna is out of the question). I wanted to show him two weekends from now in SC and early next month in Hickory, NC, but I don't know if he'll want to show again or not. He was fine in the last show.
Well that's good he did a little better today! If he was fine in the last show, maybe he'll be fine in the next one! Maybe a lot of the weekend's troubles was your mood going into it. Getting ninth out of 14 is not bad!! That is respectable, IMO. And the judge that gave him 7th today could have withheld the ribbon too. That's what they told me also when Gigi got 5th of 5 shorthairs this morning b/c she was pretty hissy.

If you decide not to show TC again, can you do other things with him? How about a therapy cat? If I decide not to try Gigi again then I might do therapy with her (doesn't involve other cats), or just continue to enjoy taking her places on her harness and leash! Coming from the dog world--I've had my share of disappointments there--a dog's career can end abruptly if he goes oversize or if you have a dog that won't show (hates it). I've had my moments where I wondered "what next?". I'm sure a lot of us know the feeling. You put all your eggs in one basket--showing this cat--looking forward to a particular show or shows...and then you feel you have nothing to look forward to if that path gets abruptly altered. I hope in your case you can keep showing TC. Try the rescue remedy someone suggested. Ask the clerk yourself to maybe put him in a spot where he won't be right next to another cat or can't see ALL the cats. Good luck next time!
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post #26 of 34
9/7/09 at 5:20am
Unfortunately that's what happens with spoilt cats - they get grumpy. When I was younger my show cats were bad tempered because I didn't stop showering them with kisses. Flutterby in my signature cannot be shown because she was my pet cat and was too spoilt.
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post #27 of 34
9/7/09 at 10:57am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Starfish View Post
well TC did a little better today and got two finals (one was 7 of 7 shorthairs so it was really a consolation prize). I am frustrated because he is my only show cat left (Luna is out of the question). I wanted to show him two weekends from now in SC and early next month in Hickory, NC, but I don't know if he'll want to show again or not. He was fine in the last show.
I know exactly how you feel. That is how I felt when I took Church to his last show... He was SO grumpy and I felt really disappointed because all I had to show were him and Roxy and Roxy was also grumpy that show (Roxy went to one more show but also ended up stopping.) However a few months later I found a litter of feral kittens and ended up keeping several of them. I took two to a show and they did pretty well so we're going to our second show in October.
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post #28 of 34
9/13/09 at 1:11pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by WellingtonCats View Post
Unfortunately that's what happens with spoilt cats - they get grumpy. When I was younger my show cats were bad tempered because I didn't stop showering them with kisses. Flutterby in my signature cannot be shown because she was my pet cat and was too spoilt.
Ugh, tell me about it Sam. My first show cats were spoiled and fat, and then they couldn't show because they were hissy, growly, and out of condition! We have to give them "tough love" and train them to do things by NOT rushing to their rescue the moment they seem uncomfortable. If my guys hiss, well . . . they hiss. That's what cats do when they are faced with a perceived threat. If I react to that hiss, I think I'm telling them they were correct in feeling threatened. If I don't react. . . they pick up on my calm emotion. Cats are very sensitive to the way we feel and how we react to them. And lots of treats after a good ring always help too!
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post #29 of 34
9/13/09 at 3:07pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by FerrisCat View Post
Ugh, tell me about it Sam. My first show cats were spoiled and fat, and then they couldn't show because they were hissy, growly, and out of condition! We have to give them "tough love" and train them to do things by NOT rushing to their rescue the moment they seem uncomfortable. If my guys hiss, well . . . they hiss. That's what cats do when they are faced with a perceived threat. If I react to that hiss, I think I'm telling them they were correct in feeling threatened. If I don't react. . . they pick up on my calm emotion. Cats are very sensitive to the way we feel and how we react to them. And lots of treats after a good ring always help too!
Hey, FC--btw, at the show I went to I met a gal and her Vans! She was (or is affiliated with) Jazzcats? Do you know this cattery? I met her beautiful blue boy and her mismarked HHP called "Darnit" (no color on head, LOL re: the name!) She also mentioned someone named Don, a judge that she co-breeds with? Anyway, she was very nice and we talked quite at length. She told me about upcoming kittens, but I don't think I'll be ready quite that soon. I've also not completely decided on Vans vs. Coons. I love TA's too, but I like the bigger bone and body of the other two breeds. But one of the high points of the show was the people I met and the gorgeous cats!
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post #30 of 34
9/13/09 at 3:46pm
Allmycats-- Yes, I know the Turkish Van breeder you met! We're good pals Missi's blue boy (Grover) is actually out of my breeding. He was the coolest kitten growing up, so tolerant. I could toss him in the air and flip him upside-down and he'd be purring all the way. Did you get to feel his coat? Just like a rabbit. . . Amazingly enough, he was from a litter of 9, and all survived.

Missi's newest litter has the same sire as our very first show cat, Otto. They're all cute and very well marked. Keep her info in your files, she will have many exciting litters in the future.

If you're trying to decide between Vans and Coons, she should be a good person to talk to. Missi has a lot of experience with Maine Coons as well.
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