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My friend got rejected to adopt a cat! - Page 5  

post #121 of 145
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by clixpix View Post
The Petco's here have rescued cats from various organizations in it's stores...not cats from breeders. I assumed yours was the same way. I've never seen a Petco with BYB cats, but perhaps yours is different.

Wanting to get a job, and actually getting a job are two very different things. Many fields are saturated, and there aren't jobs available. He could have waited until he had a job. That's all anyone is saying.

I said it was a selfish act. I didn't call your friend a selfish person. That's two very different things.

I'm just saying that most here will not condone his lying to get the cat.

At my Petco (or Petsmart, not sure) they have random cats in cages and you can just pick them out and buy one...you don't need to get interviewed and stuff.

He isn't a lazy bum, if he was, he wouldn't have all this money in savings for him to live off of, he worked for it.

He isn't too happy right now because he suffers from depression, he has no friends because of this and he wanted a rescue cat he could take care of and love (like a therapy cat), he thinks it will help him a great deal and so do I. He's a really great person. He lives in Canada, I'm not sure if it's difficult to get a job there, but he says it's not really hard. He's getting a job now you guys, don't worry.
post #122 of 145
I'm very obviously coming in late to this thread. But, I feel, as a pet owner and educated individual, that I need to respond.

First off, there is no way to know this individual's true circumstances (as everything thus far has been heresay -- and subjective at that) and so I'm not going to go off on a tangent about the adoption agency's (be it a shelter, rescue organization, or the like) reasoning for rejecting his application to adopt a cat. But, that being said, I am absolutely appalled that he would choose to go back and adopt a cat by being dishonest.

In fact, there are a lot of issues where this thread is concerned that has me scratching my head and wondering whether there is truth to any of what has been stated thus far. It seems outlandish, off, and just too, well, scattered to be of truth. I'm purely speculating here and this is just my opinion, but it's something I've been wondering about over the last hour while I've read and re-read this thread (again and again).

Organizations of any kind that are adopting out animals have a responsibility to the said animals to ensure that they are going to stable, loving, educated homes. However, what that boils down to is different for everyone in every situation -- especially as evidenced in this thread (some shelters adopting out with the knowledge that the cats may be declawed, some shelters requiring home visits, some with extensive interview processes, and some that lack structure). Regardless of what the reasoning behind their rejection of the potential adopter, it was their right to choose not to adopt the cat out to him. The fact that he then lied to adopt another cat is, indeed, fishy and it would be a stretch to assume that the majority of members of this site would agree with lying to get a cat.

The sheer fact that he lied to adopt another cat at the same shelter has my head spinning. That reason alone is most likely the "vibe" that many were speaking of on this thread. Lying to adopt an animal is irresponsible -- in almost all situations (there are some situations where lying may be in the animal's best interest, but that would be situations such as neglect or abuse). From the picture you've painted of your friend, he seems like a troubled individual. I don't know him and will say nothing more than that, but if he feels that lying to adopt an animal is appropriate behavior, there is some sort of disconnect there and that alone sends a red flag up to me immediately.

There are a lot of issues in this thread. First, he was dead set on a Maine Coon named Odessa who was 8 years old. And he was denied the adoption due to the fact that he didn't have the name of a humane vet (this request is not outlandish -- many organizations would like either personal or professional references as well as information on what vet the potential adopter is preparing to use). However, if he did his research, he should have had that information available. Then Odessa was magically older and not a Maine Coon at all. And he was then suddenly potentially able to adopt once again. But, again, he was rejected -- this time due to the fact that he was unemployed (which is a valid reason). And, also, there was concern over potential home visits which should not be an issue for anyone who is being open and honest through the adoption process in the first place. Then Odessa is suddenly no longer available, but they screen him again and approve him to adopt another cat. Did they not remember him from the previous two interviews? In my experience, that alone would've thrown up huge red flags. I'm just utterly confused.

This whole thing has me reeling. And, to the original poster, why are you so defensive? Lying is lying is lying and as a cat owner (I'm assuming here -- are you a cat owner?) why would you not find this set of circumstances alarming? Unfortunately, in this day and age, animals are seen as property and commodoties, not as living, breathing, feeling creatures -- would you think lying to adopt a child would be appropriate? Animals, in my opinion, are no different. And, in fact, the situation should be even more strict considering the lack of legislation to protect animals. And, trust me, we've all been privy to the horror stories or horrific neglect and abuse as well as the stories of cats being returned to shelters or euthanized for financial reasons. There's nothing wrong with being an advocate for animals for someone certainly has to be. The fact that your friend has lied and that you're in agreement with his practices is sad. My prayers go out to his new cat and, yes, even to him. I think everyone involved in this situation needs them...
post #123 of 145
Thread Starter 
Well sorry I painted a weird picture for you guys. I don't personally see what's weird about it.

He wanted a maine coon but they didn't have any at the shelter, then he found Odessa...they said he could have her and told him to come back with a vet's name...he did the next day.....then they proceeded to ask him if he had a job, he said no...and they denied him. Why did they not ask him this in the first place and make him come back the next day?

He goes back a 3rd time with the intention of lying about having a job, but they said Odessa is too old to be adopted and is untameable. So he choose another cat, as many of you suggested "He needs to accept the fact he can't get Odessa", so he got Loops They asked if he had a job, he said yes, and handed Loops over...end of story.

Loops now has a home, my friend is happy, what's done is done. Sorry he had to lie about it guys, but he can't rush and get a job all the sudden...especially after being denied 2 times for Odessa then coming back stating he had a job, and being rejected again.

If he had "weird vibes", he wouldn't have Loops right now.

You guys, when the first time they told him he could have Odessa, they did NOT ask if he was employed...so he thought it didn't matter, they told him to come back with a vets name and to GET READY FOR ODESSA, BUY HER FOOD AND TOYS..ECT.......only to later reject him for not having a job. That is wrong! Worse than him lying in my opinion.
post #124 of 145
And, on a side note, I work at a PetSmart here in the states. We do have cats on "display," but they are cats that are brought to our store for a set period of time by rescue organizations in our local area. The cats are not adopted out by PetSmart, but are rather adopted out by the rescue organization and therefore are adopted following an application and interview process as determined by the specific agency.

It is PetSmart's corporate policy to only take cats for the "7 Day Cats" program from registered adoption agencies. We follow the organization's guidelines, but do screen potential adopters. We even have the right to deny potential adopters from petting or handling any of the cats for any reason based on our educated opinion of the potential adopter. Yes, it is our opinion, and our opinion only, but it's just one tool used to ensure that the cats available for adoption are placed in the best possible home environment. Many people are angry and upset by our practices, as well as the practices of the governing agency, but that's that. The welfare of the cats, not the feelings of the potential adopters, should and does come first. People can get over having their feelings of hurt, a cat can't be brought back to life if starved, neglected, or abused.

Once again, in my opinion (based on personal and professional experience), your friend acted irresponsibly. Sure, it's all well and good to want to adopt a cat. And, he very well may be a good, responsible owner, but animals need advocates and someone who lied to adopt has some issues which would seriously have me reconsidering their ability to be a good owner.

ETA: Animals should NEVER be adopted based on the adoptee's need to have something or someone make him or her feel better. Cat's can be terrific companions and have therapeutic qualities, but never should that be the only reason why an animal is adopted -- it rarely ends well. And, I speak from first-hand experience after witnessing cats' horrific neglect and abuse at the hands of a family member who adopted cats to make him feel better, happier, and more motivated. I'll reiterate again, lying was wrong and, as times goes on, this story just gets fishier and fishier...
post #125 of 145
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alison Joy View Post
ETA: Animals should NEVER be adopted based on the adoptee's need to have something or someone make him or her feel better. Cat's can be terrific companions and have therapeutic qualities, but never should that be the only reason why an animal is adopted -- it rarely ends well. And, I speak from first-hand experience after witnessing cats' horrific neglect and abuse at the hands of a family member who adopted cats to make him feel better, happier, and more motivated. I'll reiterate again, lying was wrong and, as times goes on, this story just gets fishier and fishier...
That's silly. He didn't want a cat only for that reason, he's owned cats all of his life and he wanted another. He's a pet lover.

So if somebody lies, that questions their ability to be a good pet owner? Nonsense. None of you have lied about anything? If I lie about something, that means I will beat my cat and not feed her? No.

The SHELTER is what's fishy, not my friend. I guess none of you will understand that because you all volunteer and love shelters and all of that stuff.
post #126 of 145
If they lie about the situation in order to get a cat when they know the shelter's policies, then yes - that is bad. And yes, I am a very honest person who does not knowingly lie to get what I want. I believe in karma.

If he had already been rejected twice, I don't understand why he went back a third time when you said he didn't like them because of a bad reputation he only just found out about? Do you know if he definitely adopted from that same shelter? Surely he would have gone to another group who had a better reputation.
post #127 of 145
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahp View Post
If they lie about the situation in order to get a cat when they know the shelter's policies, then yes - that is bad. And yes, I am a very honest person who does not knowingly lie to get what I want. I believe in karma.

If he had already been rejected twice, I don't understand why he went back a third time when you said he didn't like them because of a bad reputation he only just found out about? Do you know if he definitely adopted from that same shelter? Surely he would have gone to another group who had a better reputation.
Because he wanted to get Odessa by saying that he was employed. He still wanted Odessa...he wasn't just going to find another shelter, he was still 100% set on wanting Odessa until they told him she was not up for adoption anymore, but they let him adopt an 8 year old cat named Loops instead.
post #128 of 145
My friend used to work at Petsmart in Canada and all the cats were from rescues that they had there.
In fact the only reasn she is not working there right now is now is because she hurt her back.
My sister has adopted from Petsmart also and they screen the people.
I am not here to take sides but some things do not sound right.
post #129 of 145
Thread Starter 
What is so "fishy" and what "doesn't sound right" to you guys?

Do you think he is going to molest the cat or something? Seriously. You people are not telling me. What is going to go wrong all because he lied about being employed?
post #130 of 145
Quote:
Originally Posted by Degu_2009 View Post
None of you have lied about anything?
I've never lied so that someone will give me a cat because I'm too self-centered to act responsibly.
post #131 of 145
Quote:
Originally Posted by Degu_2009 View Post
What is so "fishy" and what "doesn't sound right" to you guys?

Do you think he is going to molest the cat or something? Seriously. You people are not telling me. What is going to go wrong all because he lied about being employed?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Degu_2009 View Post
Can't anyone learn how to read a thread? No offense. I hate having to repeat myself when people can just read my posts.
How ironic.
post #132 of 145
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Going Nova View Post
How ironic.
Nobody has said anything except how "It sounds fishy", nobody is saying what they think he intends to do with the cat......seriously. You guys think up the worst things all because of 1 lie. Get over it. I've seen homeless men on the streets begging for change who own dogs.
post #133 of 145
Quote:
Originally Posted by Degu_2009 View Post
Nobody has said anything except how "It sounds fishy", nobody is saying what they think he intends to do with the cat......seriously. You guys think up the worst things all because of 1 lie. Get over it. I've seen homeless men on the streets begging for change who own dogs.


Why should anyone make up stories about what your 'friend' intends to do with the cat? To amuse you?

Several posters presented arguments detailing why it was wrong for your friend to lie to the rescue. What exactly is it that you want to hear?

ETA: Several posters also pointed out holes in your story, i.e. petfinder not serving Canada, the pet supply store not screening applicants, etc.
post #134 of 145
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Going Nova View Post


Why should anyone make up stories about what your 'friend' intends to do with the cat? To amuse you?

Several posters presented arguments detailing why it was wrong for your friend to lie to the rescue. What exactly is it that you want to hear?
I know why people are saying it's wrong.

I want to know what's "FISHY" about it. It's a completely different thing.

You are being INSANELY rude.
post #135 of 145
Quote:
Originally Posted by Degu_2009 View Post
What is so "fishy" and what "doesn't sound right" to you guys?

Do you think he is going to molest the cat or something? Seriously. You people are not telling me. What is going to go wrong all because he lied about being employed?
1. He got rejected to adopt a cat and seemed to get angry about it (or at least you did...)
2. He hadn't even spent time with Odessa yet was desperate for her. That to me as someone involved with cat adoptions sets off warning bells. I strongly feel that a person has to spend time with a cat to get to know it.
3. He wouldn't consider another cat when Odessa wasn't available.
4. He lied to get a cat. He could have waited until he had a job, or gone to another shelter. Why does he need a job? Because if a 10 year old cat gets sick, you may be up for around $1000 to figure out what's wrong and treat it. It would be irresponsible to adopt an older cat to someone with no job - a few thousand in savings can go VERY fast with a sick cat.
5. You're only hearing his side of the story, not the shelter's side, yet you are placing all the blame on the shelter and getting very defensive with every post. You are also condoning lying to get a cat. The people who "volunteer and love shelters and all of that stuff" are just trying to explain the situation from our perspective.

Please don't take it personally, nobody is angry at you. You chose to tell the story and specifically say that your friend lied to get a cat, which you surely knew would upset people?
post #136 of 145
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahp View Post
1. He got rejected to adopt a cat and seemed to get angry about it (or at least you did...)
2. He hadn't even spent time with Odessa yet was desperate for her. That to me as someone involved with cat adoptions sets off warning bells. I strongly feel that a person has to spend time with a cat to get to know it.
3. He wouldn't consider another cat when Odessa wasn't available.
4. He lied to get a cat. He could have waited until he had a job, or gone to another shelter. Why does he need a job? Because if a 10 year old cat gets sick, you may be up for around $1000 to figure out what's wrong and treat it. It would be irresponsible to adopt an older cat to someone with no job - a few thousand in savings can go VERY fast with a sick cat.
5. You're only hearing his side of the story, not the shelter's side, yet you are placing all the blame on the shelter and getting very defensive with every post. You are also condoning lying to get a cat. The people who "volunteer and love shelters and all of that stuff" are just trying to explain the situation from our perspective.

Please don't take it personally, nobody is angry at you. You chose to tell the story and specifically say that your friend lied to get a cat, which you surely knew would upset people?

He felt bad for Odessa...she's been there a year and they told him she was frightened. He wanted to give her a good home, that's all, even if he had to lie. Turns out lying was no good, Odessa is not adoptable. So he got Loops instead, a different cat who needed rescuing.

Like I said, if he had "bad vibes" they wouldn't have let him adopt the other cat.
post #137 of 145
I understand why he wanted to, and I do commend him for wanting to adopt an "unwanted" cat, but those are the reasons why at least I feel weird about the situation.

I also find it weird that the shelter knocked him back, then let him adopt a different cat
post #138 of 145
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahp View Post
I understand why he wanted to, and I do commend him for wanting to adopt an "unwanted" cat, but those are the reasons why at least I feel weird about the situation.

I also find it weird that the shelter knocked him back, then let him adopt a different cat
I just want to know what people mean by "weird" and "fishy"...that's like...suspicious...what would he intend to do by rescuing a cat? Eeeek, come on now. Wouldn't someone with "weird" intentions go pick up a cat off the street or something? I doubt he would have gone through all this BS if he had weird intentions.

I suppose they knocked him back because they didn't want anyone to adopt Odessa, but at the time she was adoptable. I'm not really sure.
post #139 of 145
Quote:
Originally Posted by Degu_2009 View Post
I just want to know what people mean by "weird" and "fishy"...that's like...suspicious...what would he intend to do by rescuing a cat? Eeeek, come on now. Wouldn't someone with "weird" intentions go pick up a cat off the street or something? I doubt he would have gone through all this BS if he had weird intentions.

I suppose they knocked him back because they didn't want anyone to adopt Odessa, but at the time she was adoptable. I'm not really sure.
Do you personally know this guy, or just over the internet? Did you go to school with him? How and where do you know him from?

And yes, you would be surprised - weird people would go through weird stuff to do bad things.... and that is only one of the reasons why shelters screen...
post #140 of 145
Could you please tell us the name of the shelter and where it is located so that we may look it up, perhaps make a few phone calls to find out why it is not a reputable shelter?

I remember you posting at one point that there was something wrong with the shelter and many complaints against it. I'd like to look them up for myself if you are unwilling to provide them for us.


It's wrong and immoral to lie for anything. Sure, everyone has lied at some point in their lives... But that doesn't make it right.

What I think is going to happen is that your friend is going to eventually give his cat back to the shelter when he can't afford a medical emergency, or finds out that the cat's personality isn't what he intended. You cannot mold an adult cat as you can mold the personality of a kitten. If "Loops" does not want to be his therapy cat and furry shoulder to cry on, then he wont, and eventually your friend will just get rid of him.
post #141 of 145
Lying to get something you've already been denied for a good reason shows instability. Refusing to accept "no" and lying to get around it shows an inability to accept reality and responsibility. Lying to adopt a cat to make himself feel better shows a narcissistic personality. Having a cat is not going to change his problems.

A stable mature person works for what he wants. He goes out and gets a job so that he can support himself and his cat. He doesn't just lie.

Poor kitty.
post #142 of 145
im confused in your orginial post you said your friend wasnt allowed the cat, not your saying he was, but you also said back on page one that your friend might of stood a chance if he found the name of a human vet hense the might stand a chance as upto untill that point it was still a no from the shelter

you are showing nothing but disrespect for every member that has posted advice to help your and your friend

from personal experience with not having a job and having a curious cat (lets face it they will sniff and bite at anything they fancy) one of mine ate a piece of metal it cost over £300 in emergancy vet fees then she needed an £800 operation then about £100 in meds and after care that was in the space of 2 days we had to find the money and that is no word of a lie so vet fees eat into saving pretty quick then you got to remember there are the costs of insurance and check ups and booster vaccinations so he might be sitting pretty on the money front at the moment but what happens if there is an ermergancy.

the members here have a lot of good advice you should listen to it and pass it onto your friend, if hes suffering from depression maybe see a doctor than just getting a cat
post #143 of 145
Quote:
Originally Posted by -_aj_- View Post
im confused in your orginial post you said your friend wasnt allowed the cat, not your saying he was, but you also said back on page one that your friend might of stood a chance if he found the name of a human vet hense the might stand a chance as upto untill that point it was still a no from the shelter

you are showing nothing but disrespect for every member that has posted advice to help your and your friend

from personal experience with not having a job and having a curious cat (lets face it they will sniff and bite at anything they fancy) one of mine ate a piece of metal it cost over £300 in emergancy vet fees then she needed an £800 operation then about £100 in meds and after care that was in the space of 2 days we had to find the money and that is no word of a lie so vet fees eat into saving pretty quick then you got to remember there are the costs of insurance and check ups and booster vaccinations so he might be sitting pretty on the money front at the moment but what happens if there is an ermergancy.

the members here have a lot of good advice you should listen to it and pass it onto your friend, if hes suffering from depression maybe see a doctor than just getting a cat
This is my thinking. Getting a cat- though he loves them and all - will not fix his depression. I know b/c I battle the same disease and I can guarantee that having a pet is not a substitute for evaluation, treatment and therapy.
post #144 of 145
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by -_aj_- View Post

you are showing nothing but disrespect for every member that has posted advice to help your and your friend

the members here have a lot of good advice you should listen to it and pass it onto your friend, if hes suffering from depression maybe see a doctor than just getting a cat


Yes, everyone is trying to be my friend. By saying how bad it is to lie and how selfish of an act it was to lie to rescue a cat and how he will run out of money all the sudden and how he is going to return the cat and *sniff sniff* poor kitty.

I should have known posting in a place that supposedly cares more about animals than humans would be a bad idea. In other forums I have posted in about this they have agreed with me. I'm done posting here.
post #145 of 145
I think everything that needs to be said has been said regarding this topic, so the thread will now be closed. Anything further can be taken up in PMs.
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