Stages of mourning

Well I have gone right by depression and into anger.
I am annoyed that someone murdered Cheylinks friend, I am mad because my friend died from AIDS, I am mad at my brother's killer, oh yea he died at 28 years old because a drunk slammed into him head on car crash, on his way to a job he worked so hard to get. Drunk guy walked away without a scratch, and no jail time. I am mad at the world right now.
Bargaining would be next, I have nothing to offer. Acceptance, that for me now is a dim light in the distance, but it is a light.

Originally Posted by Trillcat

Well I have gone right by depression and into anger.
I am annoyed that someone murdered Cheylinks friend, I am mad because my friend died from AIDS, I am mad at my brother's killer, oh yea he died at 28 years old because a drunk slammed into him head on car crash, on his way to a job he worked so hard to get. Drunk guy walked away without a scratch, and no jail time. I am mad at the world right now.
Bargaining would be next, I have nothing to offer. Acceptance, that for me now is a dim light in the distance, but it is a light.

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When I lost my best guy friend last year I went through so many stages... some of them have yet to heal - I haven't forgotten some people for not giving me correct follow ups on his disease... I went through depression/sadness, anger, guilt... Longing...
I do have some of his ashes in my house, and I talk to him everyday... I just hope he know I love him...
Your brother know you love him - so does your friend
Are you alone at home? Is there anybody you can be with?

Originally Posted by carolinalima

When I lost my best guy friend last year I went through so many stages... some of them have yet to heal - I haven't forgotten some people for not giving me correct follow ups on his disease... I went through depression/sadness, anger, guilt... Longing...
I do have some of his ashes in my house, and I talk to him everyday... I just hope he know I love him...
Your brother know you love him - so does your friend

Are you alone at home? Is there anybody you can be with?

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I am OK, as can be, just really mad. yea, I am alone, better for me, I have to face this pain.
This has been such a weird bad day, so much to deal with, so much death. It is also the aniversary(yea, sp, I know) of my Magic crosing the bridge, my Dad had to do this on his birthday, yea, its my dad's birthday, 75 years young.
Just a bad day.

I am so sorry honey... Hang in there...
We are all here for you, ok?

I know how you feel on more than one level and can relate. When my mom died she was sick for months and suffered horribly and I felt so helpless. I did all I could to help her, but I was angry and depressed for about 8 months to the point I didn't care what happened to me.
Now my dad is sick and I have to take care of him. I have no other family and my parents have always been there for me. I get depressed having to see my dad suffer and be sick to the point where he can do very little before getting exhausted.
It is also a time you find out who your real friends are. I know it seems like everything is going so badly, but time will help. Going through these feelings are normal. It may just take time.

Originally Posted by Trillcat

I am OK, as can be, just really mad. yea, I am alone, better for me, I have to face this pain.
This has been such a weird bad day, so much to deal with, so much death. It is also the aniversary(yea, sp, I know) of my Magic crosing the bridge, my Dad had to do this on his birthday, yea, its my dad's birthday, 75 years young.
Just a bad day.

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More vibes, take care.

Originally Posted by carolinalima

I am so sorry honey... Hang in there...

We are all here for you, ok?

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Well said.... ... .....wise advice!...

So sorry to hear of such tragic losses

My thought are with you, and don't forget...Time is a good healer

So sorry you've been thru so much.

You're in my prayers sweetheart I understand how difficult loosing loved ones can be All you can do is take it one day at a time, one minute at a time.

Do you have a counselor or anyone near you that you can talk to and confide in?

Just stopping by to drop you a hug I hope you feel better...

Originally Posted by carolinalima

Just stopping by to drop you a hug

I hope you feel better...

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I am doing fine, that was one doosie of a day.
Thanks for everyone for the kind words.
I learned that though my friend had been pretty much disowned by his family when he told them he was gay, they did come around, and were there with him along with friends when he passed away. That made my heart feel so much better.
Writing here made me feel better too, though it sure didn't seem like it reading back on this. But hey, emotions gotta come out I guess, and I am glad I had this place to come to and vent.