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Cats Mourning Other Cats

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 
I had 2 cats they were brothers just under the age of 1 and last thursday 1 of them got run over, my initial reaction was to retrieve the body wait for my girlfreind to get home from work then break her the news and get the poor little fella buried asap.

My thought was to hide the dead cat (CHUCK) away from his brother (BABY) as i thought this might upset him seeing his brother lying there lifeless, since this the couple of days after baby has not seemed to miss his brother and got lots of attention. But now 5 days after the accident baby seems to be looking for chuck so i looked on google and read a article that says theat we should have shown chuck to baby to give him closure and for him to realise that he is dead. Hindsight is a great thing as i now wish i had done this.

5 days after the accident now and baby was off his food yesterday and seems restless he comes in the house then goes back out i think hes looking for chuck. apart from giving him lots of cuddles and attention is there anything that i can do for baby, as obiously showing him chuck is truly out of the question now. i know i have messed up but i wasnt thinking straight the day of the accident, if theres anything i can do to help baby get over it ill do it.
post #2 of 8
First, please don't beat yourself up - you acted out of love. And, I read a number of cat behaviorists and DVMs on both sides of the issue. Myself, and maybe it sounds silly, I'd sit down and tell Baby what happened, that you love him and Chuck, and that you both miss Chuck. I'd say to keep on giving him attention and playing with him, and keep as much of the same routine going as you can, to give him reassurance that everything hasn't changed.

May I ask, is Baby an indoor/outdoor cat? Have you thought about keeping him in? I realize that even an indoor cat can run into serious accidents, but I've got to tell you I cringe whenever I see a cat outdoors alone as I drive to work. Baby is young - you may be able to leash train him if you want him outside? Or maybe build an enclosure for him?

Prayers for you and your family now - it's a stressful time for all of you.
post #3 of 8
Thread Starter 
they were both outdoor cats they would usually stay asleep all day and only perk up when they heard the noise of my girlfreinds car central locking (it beeps quite loud) then they know that she is home and its a quick hello and then they get fed, after food they always go outside for around half hour then come in until night where they would sometimes go out or maybe stay in if the weather is bad, sometimes they would stay out for over 24 hrs and i dont think that they stayed together when they went out, a few times chuck would get accidentally locked in a shed that belongs to a neighbour and we would have to get the little bugger out,

i heard that letting baby sleep too long would let him have too much time to get upset and keeping him busy was important so i bought him a few new toys and i have been playing with him, he always has someone in the house because my girlfreind works days and i work nights
post #4 of 8
I'm so sorry for your loss. Speck mourned Smoke terribly. He didn't know what happened to him, just that he wasn't there anymore. Speck would put this large dog toy (a squirrel, the same color as Smoke) on the bed where Smoke used to sleep. It was painful to watch.
post #5 of 8
Thread Starter 
as with my cats im not sure who has the worst deal both smokey and chuck died but its speck and baby who are having to deal with it, its just a lose lose situation, usually if something bad happens sometimes somthing good happens in return but i think everybody loses what a bad sitution im truly gutted for me, you, my cats and your cats
post #6 of 8
Oh, I am so sorry!!

Please don't second guess yourself - we usually do the best we know how to do when something suddenly happens.

I would imagine that you, too, are in the grieving process - maybe Baby is picking up on that, also.

It sounds that you are doing what you can to help the little one.

Hugs to Baby for me, and, if I may be so bold - hugs to you guys.
post #7 of 8
I'm so sorry. I had 2 cats that were brothers and lost one also. Raven was 9 yrs old and had cancer. When we got back from putting him to sleep, we had a bit of his fur that the vet had clipped off. I opened the ziploc bag and let Nabu sniff the fur. He made a face, that he's never made since then and walked away. He never looked for Raven but most definitely mourned his loss. Since it happened about 2 weeks before Christmas I kind of went nuts buying new toys for Christmas for all of us to play with together. Nabu's appetite was down during that period, so I had bought him special food that I don't normally get him (Fancy Feast Medleys).

Just be there for your kitty. It will get better.
post #8 of 8
I had two brothers, Wellington and Napoleon, who were inseperable. Napoleon was poisoned one day. I did show his body to Wellington, and he licked him as I put his brother in the box for burial. But after that he looked for him everywhere for over six weeks, crying and searching all day. It was awful for both of us, thoguh I gave him as much attention as I could. he didn't really recover until he found a new companion when Biscotte joined us four months after Napoleon's death. I feel for you and Baby - it is terrible not to be able to really explain what has happened.
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