or Connect
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:


post #1 of 10
Thread Starter 
if you found out your dh/so cheated on you and then lied to you about it.

I know for me It would be over!! I don't care who instigated it, I would not feel the same towards him anymore...He did it, and even if it was just once, there would be no changing my mind...That's just me though,,,I have hard feelings towards him anyway as it is...I guess that is why I sound so harsh and closed minded....
post #2 of 10
Cheating is a life and death thing. You never know if the person is cheating with an infected person.

I believe if you are in a rocky relatonship either try to fix it or end it.

If the other person will not work on the relationship end it.

If you catch them in a lie about where they were or who they were with end it.
post #3 of 10
I agree, you either have to get over it or end it. I've seen people who know their spouse cheated, do not break up and then hold it over the cheater's head for the rest of their lives. That just makes the whole family miserable. If you can't forgive and forget, then you need to walk away for everyone's mental health. Could I forgive and forget? Maybe once, but if it ever happened again. NO WAY.
post #4 of 10
I agree with you Theresa. I already have a problem with trust because of an old boyfriend (who has now passed).

But Jake (my hubby) is just wonderful to me. And we are happy and I know he wouldn't do that to me.
post #5 of 10
My s/o cheated on me once, early in the relationship. He was busted before he even got home. I made his life, (and hers) a living hell for quite a while, while I was trying to decide what to do. He was so remorseful, that I decided to give him another chance. It turned out to be a good decision. He worked very hard to regain my trust, and I know he has never done it again. 16 years later, he goes out of his way to avoid even the appearance of impropriety. It took me a long time to be able to trust him, but it was worth it. It even eventually stopped hurting when I thought about it. We have now been together for 18 years, and are in it for life. There have been several people that tried to get between us, but we are solid, and I don't worry about what he is doing when I am not around.
post #6 of 10
I am pretty sure it would be over

I love my boyfriend so much.. we are very much in love and he is the nicest, sweetest most caring guy ever. He doesnt have a mean or dishonest bone in his body, he is amazing. I'm very lucky!!!
post #7 of 10
Like Rebecca, it happened to me pretty early in my relationship with (now) hubby. When I found out, he was out on the street that night (we were living together). He asked where he would stay and I told him that I really didn't care.

We lived apart for quite a while, eventually working it out. There were a lot of problems in our relationship at the time, and with my mental stability at that point. Not that it excused what he did, but I could at least understand why.

He did work very hard to regain my trust, and he has. He also knows that he got one second chance, and there will never be another. I don't hold it over his head or anything, but that was the deal when I did decide to give it another chance, and he knows from what happened the first time just how determined I am when I make up my mind about something.
post #8 of 10
Hubby knows he can look, but not touch.
post #9 of 10
My views on this subject are rather unconventional, or so I have been told

With "cheating" I assume you mean "actually having sex with someone else".
I won't say I would like that, but if that would be the only problem, I think I could live with it. In a past relationship I have put up with it.

Things that annoy me far more than cheating (sex) are if I would find out, he took another woman to dinner or to a movie. Or if he had long personal conversations with her.
Mostly because those are the things *I* really enjoy doing.

My last relationship ended 4 years ago, and of the things I have missed since then, sex comes last.

The relationship I was in befor that, was with the one who was, I am afraid, the love of my life.
Unfortunately I wasn't his. As they say, sh*t happens.

We had an on-off relation for about 3 years.
I *think* he slept with others during the "on" periods, I *know* he did, during the off time.
The reason I finally ended the relationship all together, was when I found out he had been on holiday with one of his matrasses (you see, I am soooo over him)

As for getting beat up. That has never happened to me (although I have seen my father slap my mother on occasion), so can't say for sure what I would do, but I am for 99,999999% sure I'd leave.

It may be simplistic, but IMO there are 2 kinds of men.
The ones that will beat a woman and the ones that don't.
Now, I am willing to give anyone the benefit of the doubt, but as soon as they have done it once, they will do it again.
I, for one, would not take the risk.

Like horses, men are just too strong, and if you can't trust them they become dangerous.
Dangerous horses can be shot, dangerous men can only be avoided.
post #10 of 10
The only problem that I have ever encountered is my partner's best friend's girlfriend slapping my partner on the butt in front of everyone making sure I could see.

I just about ended things that night as I had just moved to be with my partner and had just started living together and had only just met her. I had to be reassured that there was nothing going on and since that night she has avoided me but has told everyone her version of events. This version has gotten back to me so I sent to the real version of events around.

I can honestly say without any doubt in my mind that there was never anything going on between my partner and that female. And to this day, we have nothing to do with her or my partner's former best friend.

And if he did cheat on me, I wouldn't have to think about ending things.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: IMO: In My Opinion