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I'm really worried about a former cat of mine...

post #1 of 11
Thread Starter 
I rehomed one of my cats, Sidney, a couple months ago. Part of the adoption agreement was that I be able to stay in contact and come and see how she was doing a couple times after the adoption. Well, I have not been able to get in contact with the lady that took her. I have tried calling and emailing, but nothing. The number has been disconnected. Honestly, I feel worried and pissed at the same time. What should I do? I'm very worried that Sidney is not getting the care that she needs. My big worry is that they got evicted from their house or something, and she ended up being tossed from home to home, or she's on the streets or something. I tried to make sure that she went to a responsible home, but now I'm thinking that my judgement may have been off. I'm really confused as to what I should do! Should I drive over to their house? What if they're not there anymore? Ugh I don't know why I ever let her adopt Sidney. And I have a gut feeling that the longer I wait, the worse things will get. It makes me sick to my stomach to think of the whole situation. I want to cry!
post #2 of 11
I would drive there - with someone else, during the day... Do you have her first and last name?
I would also advise to call the shelters in her area to inquire.
Good luck...
post #3 of 11
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by carolinalima View Post
I would drive there - with someone else, during the day... Do you have her first and last name?
I would also advise to call the shelters in her area to inquire.
Good luck...
I don't have her last name, but I just sent an email to the woman that runs the rescue that did find her for me. She must know her last name. And if not, then I think I can still call around to the shelters and ask if there was a cat named Sidney dropped off by her. I'll just use her first name. I will see if I can get anyone to drive out there with me, but I'm not sure I will be able to get someone to do it. I'm checking out Petfinder right now to see if she's on there. If she is, I'll call the shelter that she's at and tell them the story. Hopefully I'll be able to get her back then. If she is at another shelter, I'm gonna be REAL mad. If that's the case, I hope for the lady's sake we never cross paths again! Do you think it would be alright if I drove there by myself during the day? She lives in an apartment building with tons of other buildings and houses around. I know it's not ideal, but that may be my only option.

I hate this feeling- I know something's going on but I feel powerless to do anything. I mean, if she's gone, she's gone. And I made that mistake. I'll never forgive myself!
post #4 of 11
I do not advise going alone, but that is only my paranoid self...
Now, if she is in a building, you can always drive there and knock on the manager's door - the manager is supposedly available during business hours...
She/he can at least confirm if the person lives there, and if she has a cat in the property. That would be a safe way to do it...
post #5 of 11
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by carolinalima View Post
I do not advise going alone, but that is only my paranoid self...
Now, if she is in a building, you can always drive there and knock on the manager's door - the manager is supposedly available during business hours...
She/he can at least confirm if the person lives there, and if she has a cat in the property. That would be a safe way to do it...
I wouldn't even know where to begin to look for the manager's door- they are kind of like townhouse/apartment mixes. So I think it would be almost near impossible to find. If I can't go alone, what do I do? I don't think there's anything else I can do. I wish I never let her adopt Sidney. Looking back at the whole thing, I should've seen the signs and known it was a bad home for her to go to. Maybe they could be on vacation? Because when I call I get a message saying that the phone has been "temporarily disconnected". But would someone disconnect their phone just for a vacation? Sorry I'm asking you all these questions lol. Can ya tell I'm worried?
post #6 of 11
Thread Starter 
I finally got a hold of her. She answered my emails for once. I just talked to her on the phone, and everything seems fine. Looks like I'll be going out to see Sidney next weekend. Honestly though, I wish I could take her back because it doesn't seem like the ideal situation for her to be in. What really worries me is that they let her out onto their deck (they say she can't leave the deck because it's a second story deck, but I know that even though it's up that high she can.) I expressed my concerns, but I think that they think they know much better. I made a mistake, and I feel sucky. What have I done to Sidney?!
post #7 of 11
Aw gee, I know how you feel. All of my cats were rescued for the purpose of rehoming the once they were spayed, healthy and socialized. But it's scary to let one go to strangers. Only once did I make a mistake, but that was bad enough that I haven't adopted out one since. Hopefully you're just worried over nothing and she's fine.
post #8 of 11
Quote:
Originally Posted by mismaris777 View Post
I finally got a hold of her. She answered my emails for once. I just talked to her on the phone, and everything seems fine. Looks like I'll be going out to see Sidney next weekend. Honestly though, I wish I could take her back because it doesn't seem like the ideal situation for her to be in. What really worries me is that they let her out onto their deck (they say she can't leave the deck because it's a second story deck, but I know that even though it's up that high she can.) I expressed my concerns, but I think that they think they know much better. I made a mistake, and I feel sucky. What have I done to Sidney?!
I really don't think letting a cat onto a deck is a major dealbreaker. Some cats are indoor-outdoor and free range when they're outdoor and it works out fine for them.

I had a private balcony at my last apartment, and my cats loved being able to go "outside." I get to go outside for fresh air, why shouldn't they as long as it's safe? My Chilsa had been raised as an indoor-outdoor cat, so being able to let him have that, since indoor-outdoor-free range wasn't an option at that complex (it was almost all driveway areas or very near a driveway, and not in a great neighborhood), was a godsend. My new apartment will have a balcony too and I plan to grow wheatgrass and catnip out there and leave the door open in acceptable weather so Squirrel and Panther can go in and out as they please.

If the deck is the biggest problem you can think of, and Sidney seems happy and healthy, I really don't think you should worry.
post #9 of 11
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ebrillblaiddes View Post
I really don't think letting a cat onto a deck is a major dealbreaker. Some cats are indoor-outdoor and free range when they're outdoor and it works out fine for them.

I had a private balcony at my last apartment, and my cats loved being able to go "outside." I get to go outside for fresh air, why shouldn't they as long as it's safe? My Chilsa had been raised as an indoor-outdoor cat, so being able to let him have that, since indoor-outdoor-free range wasn't an option at that complex (it was almost all driveway areas or very near a driveway, and not in a great neighborhood), was a godsend. My new apartment will have a balcony too and I plan to grow wheatgrass and catnip out there and leave the door open in acceptable weather so Squirrel and Panther can go in and out as they please.

If the deck is the biggest problem you can think of, and Sidney seems happy and healthy, I really don't think you should worry.
Actually, my biggest worry is the kids. They were extremely rough when I brought her initially, constantly chasing her and pulling at her limbs, head and tail and the mother didn't do anything. But I was assured that they would calm down. Well, after talking to her, they haven't. I think I just need to try and forget about Sidney, since I don't think there's anything I can do anymore and thinking about her just hurts too much.
post #10 of 11
We all feel that we can do a better job than the next person. Take a deep breath, and hold judgement until you see her next weekend. You may find that she is absolutely fine in her new home.
post #11 of 11
Quote:
Originally Posted by mismaris777 View Post
Actually, my biggest worry is the kids. They were extremely rough when I brought her initially, constantly chasing her and pulling at her limbs, head and tail and the mother didn't do anything. But I was assured that they would calm down. Well, after talking to her, they haven't. I think I just need to try and forget about Sidney, since I don't think there's anything I can do anymore and thinking about her just hurts too much.
In my experience, a cat will eventually teach them not to do that, in such a way that the kids will wish they'd figured it out on their own. You got the little guy a rabies shot so he won't have to go into quarantine if he goes with the teeth instead of the claws for that, right?
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