Some say it is better to have loved and lost, than never loved at all. But in times like this, it is so hard to think that way.
Pax made me smile and my heart melt with joy, more than he has made me sad. That I can take some comfort in.
Pax (along with his brother Kitchi) came to me a meer 7wks ago at the tender age of 6wks old. On June 19, the day most of the pics were taken, he was a healthy, robust, nibbling, playing, affectionate ball of fur due for his second set of vaccines on June 23rd.
His health degraded dramatically in the span of 2 days. We tried everything for my wee baby, everything we could.... I would have continued trying if he had the strength to fight.
But he couldn't. He could not fight bronchial pneumonia no matter what we did, it would only help if he had the strength to fight. His eyes told me last night.
Laying on his side, a wee 2lbs, me and him nose to nose...his brother on his other side.... with his weak little front paws he grabbed my hand and brought it to his chest and started purring. He said his goodbye in his own little Pax way. He adored sucking on my fingers, and having his chest rubbed. We would do it every day. He would sit so patiently, waiting for me to finish scooping the box, then he'd stand on his hind legs for his chest rub.
As I sit here writing this, there's something missing. The sound of 8 little paws thumping in the room above me.
There is something added. A pitiful cry from Kitchi, who is wondering where is partner is. It breaks my heart.
I take comfort in knowing he is pain free now, knowing that he went to sleep with someone who tried his hardest to help him over the last 2 days (my vet) and knowing without a doubt that I did everything I could for him.
My lilies bloomed today. 2 big beautiful yellow ones. When I buried Pax, I wrapped him in a paw print blankie and placed a yellow lily upon his chest where he loved to be pet.
Run and frolic my little sweet Pax. Be the healthy kit I remember from Friday... try to climb someone's legs at the Bridge, make sure you get all the chest pets you want, play till you are tired, rest peacefully my love.
Thank you for blessing me with your purrs and cuddles, even if only for a short time. I love you baby.
Pax made me smile and my heart melt with joy, more than he has made me sad. That I can take some comfort in.
Pax (along with his brother Kitchi) came to me a meer 7wks ago at the tender age of 6wks old. On June 19, the day most of the pics were taken, he was a healthy, robust, nibbling, playing, affectionate ball of fur due for his second set of vaccines on June 23rd.
His health degraded dramatically in the span of 2 days. We tried everything for my wee baby, everything we could.... I would have continued trying if he had the strength to fight.
But he couldn't. He could not fight bronchial pneumonia no matter what we did, it would only help if he had the strength to fight. His eyes told me last night.
Laying on his side, a wee 2lbs, me and him nose to nose...his brother on his other side.... with his weak little front paws he grabbed my hand and brought it to his chest and started purring. He said his goodbye in his own little Pax way. He adored sucking on my fingers, and having his chest rubbed. We would do it every day. He would sit so patiently, waiting for me to finish scooping the box, then he'd stand on his hind legs for his chest rub.
As I sit here writing this, there's something missing. The sound of 8 little paws thumping in the room above me.
There is something added. A pitiful cry from Kitchi, who is wondering where is partner is. It breaks my heart.
I take comfort in knowing he is pain free now, knowing that he went to sleep with someone who tried his hardest to help him over the last 2 days (my vet) and knowing without a doubt that I did everything I could for him.
My lilies bloomed today. 2 big beautiful yellow ones. When I buried Pax, I wrapped him in a paw print blankie and placed a yellow lily upon his chest where he loved to be pet.
Run and frolic my little sweet Pax. Be the healthy kit I remember from Friday... try to climb someone's legs at the Bridge, make sure you get all the chest pets you want, play till you are tired, rest peacefully my love.
Thank you for blessing me with your purrs and cuddles, even if only for a short time. I love you baby.
