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Advice with Harley adoption

post #1 of 9
Thread Starter 
So - I advertised Harley and got a nibble off the Siamlist.

The lady seemed fine. I told her that we had to have
a contract, a 100.00 adoption fee, home visit to check out
her 2 older cats, vet check and references from the
people she got her 2 exisiting 15 yr old Siamese's from.
Driver's licence no. and / or photo id check (to make sure
she is the person she says she is).

I told her I would microchip (at my expense!!) and deliver
Harley right to her door. I offered to stay over night, help
her set up his introduction room with babygates (so he
could see the other cats but not get out/in etc.), give
her Feliway (to calm cats) and I offered to stay overnight
if she was concerned that he wouldn't adapt to being
alone in strange place well.

Keep in mind this is a Siamese we are talking about.
Further, one who has been abused
and abandoned before. He is slow to trust and clingy.

Well, she had no trouble with the contract (I used a modified
Humane Society one), the fee or visit. She seemed to be
taken back I wouldn't just hand over the cat!!! That I would
microchip and deliver it!!! Too many "hurdles* to his adoption
she said!!! What??

Is there something fishy here, or is this person not who/what
she says?

I feel she may be getting the cat for someone else,
or will allow to roam out doors (a no no due to his FIV status
and missing teeth), or be planning to re-sell the cat. (Which won't
work if he is chipped with a chip in my name...)

Or that she might take it to the shelter and dump it (contract
violation!) without giving me a chance to come get. Did I mention I also put a trial period in the contract, so she could return him?

My other highly paranoid thought is that maybe
she would give the cat to a 3rd party who isn't able
to adopt from shelters or rescues due to being a horder
or something more sinister.

Am I a complete nut case for feeling this way? I just feel like
if she *really* wanted Harley, and was going to value him, she
would *understand completely* how much I am doing/giving
to place this cat!!

And I mean come on!! I've spent over 800 on this cat's teeth and medical!! And I'm *offering* free FREE microchip!! (A 50 dollar value BTW).... and
free delivery!!!

Anybody can you give me perspective here? Is my gut feeling right?
Am I right to feel this way??

Any thoughts, comments or insight would be GREATLY appreciated. I applied all the standard proceedures that rescue groups or humane socities do asked about her previous cats, asked if I could get references from the places she got them (supposedly the people died/moved away), asked for her vet (she had "papers" but did not send vet contact info), and went one extra step - free delivery!

I know that many shelters / rescues do the microchip - so they can find the cat if the owner loses or if they dump it out...

I just feel that this plus delivery was the part that she had trouble with, and I feel that that is the issue - she might be planning on violating the contract, letting the cat out, re-selling or giving to someone else....and by me getting her Driver's LIcence no. and bringing the cat to her, AND by me chipping, I've more or less twigged to her game...

BTW I don't know what a standard adoption fee would be for a cat - I figure 100 is not too high, given he's had his shots, he has been sputered, dewormed and deflea'd (did I mention he comes with Frontline Plus too??), 800 dollars of medical care, and free chip.

Comments? Thoughts? Should I not have been surprised? Am I being extremely paranoid? Anyone??
post #2 of 9
are you sure she understood what you were offering? cuz it seems awfully strange to agree to a home visit but then cancel out over the microchip. i must say, the offer to stay overnight is a bit odd, but as long as she knew that wasn't mandatory, i sure don't see the problem.

is the discussion completely over now? i would try explaining it one more time and ask her why these things seem like 'hurdles.' but another part of me says you (and the cat) are lucky she didn't take him; someone who thinks a couple extra steps are 'too many hurdles' is not going to be a proper caretaker for an abused cat.
post #3 of 9
Thread Starter 
Jimmylegs - I just wondered that too. I wrote back and told her
that she had to understand he was abused, and that I was
doing exactly what the rescues and shelters do vis a vis, vet
checks, home visit, fee, contract, ID (you have to show it at
the shelters you know), and in some cases the microchipping.

Also the delivery service. Many rescues bring the cat out to
you because they get another chance to visit you, and make
sure everything is on the up and up.

I was going way beyond when it came to a) paying on my own
for chipping and b) delivering and offering baby gates to help contain him in his introductory room, and also free Feliway to help calm the cats (that's about 30 bucks right there).

Not to mention, the Frontline Plus one month dose (a 20 dollar value), the food that comes with him, all his stuff and his vet records.

I think she doesn't understand the offer to stay overnight is optional, cause I was/am worried about him.

Now if she'd written back and said something concillatory like, wow, you really do love and worry about this animal, let's see what we can work out...
I don't have any references from my cat's former owners, but I can give you my vet and some neighbors etc., how would that work for you? Then it would be different. As it is, she said "vet papers" on her old cats, not "vet"
eg. she doesn't take them to the vet or use a vet. And Harley will need a vet, his teeth will need to all come out over time....due to the FIV.

So, I'm going to give her a pass. After all if she wants a Siamese that badly, there are lots at rescues. I bet she can't get a Siamese from Siamese Rescue because she doesn't qualify or they are "too expensive". And maybe the rescues/shelters in her area know her too... you never, never know....

PS. Bottom line is : If she truely isn't ready to go to the mat for Harley, then she doesn't really deserve this sweet boy. Not to mention, I'm giving INCREDIBLE value for the fee I'm charging. 800 dollars of free medical care, a 50 dollar microchip and free delivery. Sounds pretty damned good to me.
post #4 of 9
If she doesn't want to do what you want to get Harley, she does not need to be the lucky one that gets him. If she was a proper enough cat lover to understand his history and why you are being so careful, she would be a great home. She obviously is not the match for him.
post #5 of 9
it never ceases to amaze me how entitled people can get when it comes to adopting a cat. sure, it's great they're taking a chance on a grown cat with an unknown history instead of buying a kitten-mill pet-store cat, but it doesn't end there.

i know how hard it can be to have the rug pulled out from under you so far into the adoption process too. it sucks when you realize you're second-guessing yourself, trying to rationalize someone else's flaky behavior. i guess it's good to constantly evaluate how we come across to potential adopters, but a person who cannot see the value of what you've done really has no business adopting Harley.

keep trying, i'm sure you'll find the right home for him!
post #6 of 9
There are some people who are *very* private people & would be horribly offended that you would want a home visit. she may have thought "well I can handle this kitty if he is what they say", but freaked when you offered to stay the night & all the extra stuff thinking "OMG he's 10x worse than what she says". Or she may have an ulterior motive.
post #7 of 9
Originally Posted by white cat lover View Post
There are some people who are *very* private people & would be horribly offended that you would want a home visit. she may have thought "well I can handle this kitty if he is what they say", but freaked when you offered to stay the night & all the extra stuff thinking "OMG he's 10x worse than what she says". Or she may have an ulterior motive.
I think you may have offended her, with the home visit and over night visit.
post #8 of 9
In my experience, the adoption screening process can definitely be alienating. There are almost always good reasons for shelter policies, but they can inadvertently offend or deter a would-be adopter who approaches the situation with good intentions. An offer to spend the night *might* have frightened this person.

That said, I don't blame you, in this case, for being very cautious. This boy has special needs and will require a special person to give him a home. And yes, there are people who will buy a Siamese for a small sum on Craigslist and then turn around and try to make a profit by re-selling.

If I haven't already, I'd like to give you props for taking this guy in and working so hard to find him a good home!
post #9 of 9
Thread Starter 
Thanks all. I got a good perspective from my GF who was shocked
at my requirements and told me "i'd have said no way!"

When I explained the reasoning and told her she was naive
that the following things happen all the time:

adopters dumping cats out, rather than returning to the rescue
people getting animals for various purposes
dog fighting bait (it happens alas)

She actually stopped to think, and then after I'd explained
she understood my reasoning and the reason for
the 20 questions and paranoia.

And you guys have been really helpful too! Next time I'll
be a little more gentle in my approach.... But still
protect poor Harley boy. He really would have been such
a lovely boy if he hadn't been dumped out.

He's getting prettier by the day, as he fills out and
his coat grows back with solid nutrition and rest
and loving.
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