I have joined this forum this morning, because I just want to have the company of people who may understand my distress. No one in my circle seems to understand the pain I have at the moment. Yesterday afternoon, I heard the noise of a speeding car and a loud thud and I ran out to find my little cat, Sweepy, had died instantaneously from the impact. This little cat was nearly 17. I found him as a feral kitten and took him in. We have never been apart since. Because he was a feral cat, he was always all his life suspicious of other people and I was the only person he loved and he would quite happily have spent his life on my lap. I loved him dearly in return. In all those years, he never scratched or hissed or bit. He was gentle and sweet, happy to be with me but very independent in his own way as cats are. In all those years, I never once saw him go to the toilet! I don't have any children or close family and this little cat was the world to me. 17 years and then a thud and then he is gone. A couple of years ago I rescued a puppy and said I would keep him on the condition that Sweepy was able to cope with him as he was in the house first. They came to love each other and yesterday they were sunbathing outside together in the morning. The dog is looking for him everywhere today and is very upset. I feel privileged to have owned little Sweepy -he was there purring on my lap when I went through the worst periods of my life. I have buried him in the garden, but I cannot believe he is gone. I call his name and all is quiet. I know that some people will just say I am overdoing it -he was just a cat - but to me, the day will never be complete without him. Every evening before I fell asleep, he would lick my nose and say goodnight. Now it is my turn to say goodnight, Sweepy, and through my tears, I realise what a wonderful friend I have lost.