Soothing the Jealous Beast

Hello -

I have a 6 month old boy (Artemis) and a 3 month old (Calypso). We've made it through the introduction period where Artemis has finally accepted Calypso - they play together, sometimes sleep near each other and once in a while he cleans her. Where we are still running into problems is with their humans - my husband and I. Artemis was with us for three months before we got the girl and spoiled rotten. We still spoil them both and try to pay extra attention to him but he just won't let us. He seems to want to hop up on the couch and sit with us but if she's there forget it. We've tried giving him treats, but once he's done he gets down. Same with the bed. He's stopped sleeping with us, sitting with us, etc. But he still wants to be in the same room with us and he still likes being held as long as you are standing. He also doesn't want to be touched the past couple months. We just got him fixed about two weeks ago but no change. He cries for attention but when we try to give it to him he runs away.

The only time he wants to snuggle is when he's just woken up in the morning. When he was a baby he had a URI so I would take him into our bathroom and sit with him while he got a steam bath. In the mornings he runs into the bathroom where I sit down with him and he snuggles on my lap and goes to sleep - obviously he associated this room with feeling better. But the minute Calypso comes in he is up and off. This morning she came in and tried to crawl on my lap with him - he swatted at her. He is clearly jealous but he doesn't want the attention we want to give him. Does anyone have any suggestions on how we can make him feel better?

It does not seem much of a problem. Although Artemis may be less affectionate to you than before, it could be just his personality. He is after all growing up! Your Calypso looks like she is not intimidated by him (he wants to be the boss) so his reaction to her presence is very normal, but the important thing is that they both get along and are good friends.

I am experiencing almost the exact same problem at the moment. When the introductions first happened, the two cats took to each other almost immediately, playing right away. However, now my resident cat is realizing that the newcomer is here to stay and is experiencing some jealousy. Like the OP, my resident cat is not displaying the same amount of affection or interest in play if the newcomer cat is around. And unfortunately, the newcomer follows the resident cat everywhere. If we try to give the resident cat more attention, she ignores us. The whole situation is definately stressing the resident cat out, as she is displaying some dandruff and is shedding like crazy, both signs that are only apparent in her in times of high stress. I try to appease her as much as I can, but it seems to no avail. I also feel like I'm somewhat ignoring the newcomer since my primary wish is keep the resident cat happy.

Like the OP, I am also looking for suggestions. Classik80, have you found any solutions that are helping?