First time home buyer, it's really hard

lmunsie

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*sigh*
I am in the process of buying my first house with my SO
we have been looking for about a month, we are pre-approved, have an agent etc. Nothing spectacular has come up.

We check the listings EVERY day.

We went away from Thursday-Monday and when we came home our DREAM house in our price range was available, we did a drive by and it was everything we could have wanted, so immediately called our realtor, who set up the earliest appnt. (for this afternoon), we got the papers ready to make an offer and everything. However an hour before they told us a conditional offer has already been made by someone else so the house was no longer available.

I actually feel a little heartbroken, this was the closest we've been to actually going through with it all and I had already sort of fallen in love with the place. I had no idea real estate was so emotional! I guess it is a lot of money..
I'm actually kicking myself for going away for the weekend, and thinking if I had been here maybe I could have got it

*sigh*


vibes for us finding the right place?
 

oscarsmommy

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O-H-I-O!
HUGE vibes coming your way!

My fiance and I just bought our first home! We have officially been in our own house for 6 months already


Homebuying is VERY stressful but you will find YOUR home! We saw 30-45 houses and the house we bought was the last house we saw! We KNEW when we found it and have never looked back


Good luck and keep your head up! It's very frustrating but it WILL happen for you!
 

snake_lady

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Originally Posted by lmunsie

However an hour before they told us a conditional offer has already been made by someone else so the house was no longer available.

I actually feel a little heartbroken, this was the closest we've been to actually going through with it all and I had already sort of fallen in love with the place. I had no idea real estate was so emotional! I guess it is a lot of money..
I'm actually kicking myself for going away for the weekend, and thinking if I had been here maybe I could have got it

*sigh*


vibes for us finding the right place?
If its only a conditional offer, can't you put your name on it too? The reason I ask is because I've seen a few conditional offers on homes on my street that fell thru. One of my neighbours, bought a house in another city when he had a conditional offer on his here. The buyer did not meet the conditions, and ended up not getting the house. My friend was stuck with 2 mortgage payments because of it, for 7mos till another buyer got it.

Mega that you can find the right home for you. It is indeed very stressful.

We ended up building our own home for a few reasons.... 1 being we wanted a 2-story and aside from one home, all of the others are either raised ranches, or splits. But I tell ya, I feel your stress. I think building our home was the most stressed out I've ever been LOL.

lots and lots of that you can find what you are looking for.
 

addiebee

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Yes, it is very stressful and emotional. Try really hard not to "fall in love" with a property. Look with you eyes; decide with your head. And be strong about it. I was persistent and patient - drove the realtor crazy but didn't settle and got most all of what I wanted in a price range I could afford.
 
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lmunsie

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Originally Posted by Snake_Lady

If its only a conditional offer, can't you put your name on it too?
thanks for the support! man do I ever need it.

As for the offer, they told us we can't.

However if the conditions aren't met (just home inspection and financing) we are first on the list to see the place, but around here, 99% of the time those conditions are met once the offer is in
 
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lmunsie

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Originally Posted by AddieBee

Yes, it is very stressful and emotional. Try really hard not to "fall in love" with a property. Look with you eyes; decide with your head. And be strong about it. I was persistent and patient - drove the realtor crazy but didn't settle and got most all of what I wanted in a price range I could afford.
I know this is really good advice!
I'm trying to go back now and think about all the things I didn't like


I know it'll happen, and my realtor is my uncle, who I trust 150% and doesn't mind me calling him every half an hour, so that's a big bonus.....
 

MoochNNoodles

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I can kind of feel your pain. DH and I are looking and he has fallen hopelessly in love with a property; only to find out that the owners had already established a verbal agreement to purchase the home. Our realtor told us that rules have changed recently; that a verbal agreement is considered binding. Fortunately for us; our realtor lives right behind these people and knows them pretty well (but isn't selling the home; we have a long established connection with her ourselves) and they are well aware that if for some reason that sale falls through; we want to know right away.
 

sandtigress

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I looked for months trying to find a place - my roommate and I had found a nice little house in the price range my parents would help me with, in a great neighborhood and all, and I had put down an offer for it. While we were working on the paperwork, the house's owner tried to pull some fast ones on us by switching some terms, which my realtor caught. So we backed out of the negotiations, since we felt we couldn't trust her. I ended up having to find an apartment to rent really fast, and was very upset that we hadn't been able to get that house!

A few months later though, after deciding with the girl I had been going to live with that I would be living on my own - I went looking for something different - a 2 bd/1.5 bath condo. I emailed my realtor my new thoughts, and he called me back that day, saying he had a place that would be perfect, but it was going to go the very next day if I didn't make an offer right then.

This place was perfect - lots of new upgrades like custom lights, glass-fronted cabinets, and a new kitchen island. It was everything I had been looking for in a great neighbor, and at a great price - much lower than anything else I had seen. Even better, the lady was a cat owner too, and had a kitty door cut into the pantry door so that the litterbox could be in there!

I made the offer, got the place, and have been living here very happily for the past several years.

So keep looking - your true dream place is just around the corner! And it will be better than you imagined!
 

momofmany

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I bought my 4th house a few years back and I can tell you that every house you buy will bring you stress! I actually scanned real estate ads for a few years before buying this house. When I saw the ad, looked up the location and drove past it before I even called a realtor. We walked in the door and made the offer. Good things come when all things fall into place. Your house will come. Don't let things get you down!

 

mews2much

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Dont give up looking.
You will get something.
We had the same thing happen to us a year ago.
We had one house but it flunked inspection.
There were a few other houses we thought we would get but we got out bid on some.
The bank raised the price on one.
After all that we ended up with this house.
We made a offer on this house because some one backed out at the end.
The next day the bank accepted our offer.
Our lease was up and this house was our last hope.
It will work out for you.
 

yosemite

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Lise, when the right house for you comes along it will happen. We are in our 4th house and each one "spoke" to us for whatever reason and we've been very happy. Having a real estate agent you trust is important so you are lucky there. Some real estate agents play games and work together, i.e., telling you another offer came in when it actually didn't.
 

tara g

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for you

Rob and I definitely had a frustrating time looking for a house to buy, so we built one instead! There was a lot out of our price range, because when we were looking, home prices were still pretty outrageous. Our price range was either really tiny cookie-cutter subdivision homes we absolutely REFUSED to buy, or 1200 sqft houses out in the middle of nowhere, 50 miles from work! We wanted 1500sq ft minimum, with at least an acre of land.

I was approved to $185k, by myself (Rob couldnt be included due to his work situation), and my in-laws co-signed for the other $3000 I wasnt approved for. We ended up with 1.56 acres (from my FIL) and a 1712sqft brick ranch house.

Building one was frustrating also, it took forever, lots of paperwork, set backs, etc. But it was actually worth taking so long since we received that first time homebuyer $8000 tax credit this year!
If it was finished when they said, we would have only gotten that $7500 "loan". We also go an FHA loan so we didn't HAVE to put any $$ down (used most of our savings from the last 3 years to furnish and put in well & septic).
 

gailc

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We have lived in our one and only purchased house since 1987. We looked at alot and went thouh a few realtors before we came along this house which was for sale my owner.

One of the first houses we saw however we really wanted-it have river frontage across the road, out in the country, 5 acres but the realtor who had the property wasn't eager to show it. Turns out he bought it, removed the river frontage and 3 acres of land and re-listed it for a higher price. We didn't like it as well then.

Good luck, you know the house when you finally find it again!
 

russian blue

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Oh, I certainly know the stress around buying a home! Rob and I lived in a condo in downtown Toronto and we wanted to purchase a house 6 years ago. We started looking at houses in September and we didn't want to spend too much. Toronto is the worst place to buy when you're on a budget.


So, we looked at over 100 (!) homes and we ended up buying our current home 5 months later. We wanted a house in an excellent neighbourhood (but didn't mind a reno special), that had character (wasn't a subdivision home), still able to commute to the downtown core, and one that would hold its value. We ended up buying the cheapest house on the most expensive street in a historical area and it has worked out wonderfully for us. The 'bones' of the house were perfect, it just needed some reno and TLC.

My best advice - when purchasing a home, always buy while keeping the thought of selling it on your mind. Since it's your biggest purchase, you want to be able to sell it down the road in case you get in an emergency (job loss, illness etc.). The worst thing you can do is buy a house for the 'pretty cosmetics' and later find out it has major electrical/plumbing/foundation problems.

It's better to buy a smaller, less renovated house and do upgrades when you have the time and can afford it. You never want to take on a large mortgage and end up being house poor and can't live at all because of large mortgage payments.

I love real estate - I check the listings weekly and am always looking out for our next house.
We'll probably be selling our current house in a year or two.

But don't rush - it's a huge purchase and you want to make sure you make the best purchase for you.
 
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lmunsie

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thanks so much everyone, i can't tell you how good it feels to realize everyone goes through it. I never put emotions on this kind of thing, but as it turns out it's really quite an emotional process!
Met up with my uncle today and did 4 house tours, and boy do I feel better. Saw the potential and downfalls of each house, took some off the list, put some of the B list........... I'm starting to get it!
 

MoochNNoodles

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Originally Posted by lmunsie

thanks so much everyone, i can't tell you how good it feels to realize everyone goes through it. I never put emotions on this kind of thing, but as it turns out it's really quite an emotional process!
Met up with my uncle today and did 4 house tours, and boy do I feel better. Saw the potential and downfalls of each house, took some off the list, put some of the B list........... I'm starting to get it!
It is very emotional. I haven't slept a full night since we started looking. Well, maybe one full night; but that's about it. DH and I were both getting on each others nerves in bed last night between the rolling over and what not. Neither of us can stop the wheels in our heads from turning it seems. I've done better sleeping on the couch!
 

twstychik

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They say that buying a house as a couple is even more stressful than planning a wedding and I think second only to having a child. Of course, I can't find anything to back that up... but I swear I've heard it somewhere.

Best of luck! I'm sure you'll find something that is perfect (for now). DH and I are hoping to buy next year... before our little one it too mobile so we'll be there too.
 

yam102284

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for you!

I'm kind of in the same boat as you. We are also buying our first home, but we're not as far as you. We're approved and such for our loan, we're just in the process of finding a realtor we trust. There are a lot of cute houses in my area and for the right price too.

We're also planning our wedding as well, so it's double as stressful for us!

Good luck to you!
 
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