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Cat and Kitten intorductions - worries about my cat

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 
Hi all,

Sorry to type in a long post as my first, but i'm not sure where to turn!

We've been trying really hard to handle our cat and kitten introductions properly. We finally let them see themselves face to face and things were a bit rough. My cat did alot of hissing and seemed to want to get away from the kitten as much as possible. It is very painful for me to see this as I feel like i've lost a friend. Sh growls at me, and will rarely let me touch her even though one of the biggest things I read was to pay lots of attention to your cat.

Today has been a better day. The kitten came by when I tired playing with the cat. The cat hissed and snarled, but even took a sniff of the kittens tail when it got too close. She then ran away into the kitchen. Today marks the first day that my cat has slept on the chair instead of the top of the couch since the kitten has arrived. As I type this, the kitten is asleep on the couch and the cat is asleep on the chair about 8 feet away. It's a relief to see, and I hope it means progress. This has been a very tough experience.

There are a few concerns that I will list:

1- She is not playing much at all. The one nice thing about our cat was that she was needy and always wanted to be played with (strings, balls, etc). She won't play much right now or for the past 3 days. Will her playful spirit return?

2- She is not eating as much as before. Is this just stress related?

3- Before this afternoon, she would spend most of the time staring out the window from the top of the couch lying down. Is she scared to be too low? It seems that she is trying to be stuck up and not look at us on the couch. Does she hate us?

4 - For me this is the saddest thing. A few times a week, our cat would jump into bed with us and sleep with us. Every morning she would come in when the alarm clock would go off and lick me for a while. This morning was the first that she didn't. The kitten follows us into bed as well, and I don't believe she is ready to hop into bed with the kitten. Is it possible that my cat will return and perform her old "wake up calls", or will she give up now? I woke up this morning and held her in the living room. She performed her same "wake up" tasks on me after that.

Anyways, again sorry for the long post. I just want to see if my cat will return to herself someday. Like I mentioned earlier, it almost seems like we lost a friend, and I was just hoping to be reassured/told that we screwed up . It seems like progress is being made, but I can't entirely tell.

Thanks so much.

Adam
post #2 of 14
A little more information would be helpful. How old is your cat? How old is the kitten? Is the kitten male or female? How long have you had the kitten? Are they both spayed/neutered? How long did you keep them separated before you did face-to-face introductions?

Assuming you haven't had the kitten very long, it sounds like things are going normally. In time they will work things out between themselves, it will just feel like a really long time to you.
post #3 of 14
Thread Starter 
Thank you for the reassurances.

Both the cat and kitten are female and spayed.

The cat is almost 3, and the kitten is 4 months.

We were living in a household with a cat and moved away about 3 weeks ago. These 2 cats got along (well they'd chase each other around at night). At night, my cat would be looking for the other cat which made us sad. We've always wanted to adopt another, and finally got around to it.

We had them sepeated for about 2 days before bringing them together. This may be a little quick, but they were sniffing at each other through the door and stopped hissing and stuff. The kitten has now been in the household since Thursday. Today marks Day 1 of introductions.

Anyways thanks for any other advice, its really appreciated!!
post #4 of 14
It sounds like things are going well. It's really been a very short time and if all they're doing is hissing and hiding from each other, I'd say they're doing just fine. Give it some more time--at least a month before you start to panic. If they are fighting--actually drawing blood, fur flying, etc.--you should separate them again and start the introductions over. Otherwise, just keep on doing what you're doing. for a smooth transition.

Check out some of the other threads on introductions. You'll see that every cat and group of cats is different.
post #5 of 14
Thread Starter 
Thanks again,

Do you think my cat will ever return to sleep with us? It worries me a bit as it was one of my favorite things about her.

Thank you for any tips
post #6 of 14
Often, it takes several months for them to fully integrate....don't worry too much - give her some time to adjust to sharing her "kingdom" with a kitten.
post #7 of 14
Thread Starter 
Hi all,

Thanks for all the help so far. I wanted to update our progress so far to see if they are behaving normally.

Over the last couple of days, it seems like my cat has been getting more used to the kitten. They have slept in the same room, and have even slept on top of he couch together (at opposite ends mind you). This was initiated by the kitten, but my cat did leave and come back to the same spot. My cat has been eating more (not full amount), and has even played a bit when the kitten does not follow. There is still quite a bit of hissing and growing when the kitten enters my cats “bubbleâ€. My cat does attempt to sniff the kittens tail, but then walks away and growls/hisses.

The one thing that I’ve wanted my cat to do is to still come back into my bed in the middle of the night. She used to wake me up when the alarm would go off and lick me until I woke up. This hasn’t happened since we brought our kitten home. In fact she would barely come into the room until yesterday she took a nap on top of the bed. The last two nights she has tried to come up. The first night, she growled and didn’t jump up at all. Last night she hoped up (probably did not see the kitten), growled and went away. She then came back later and scratched at the bed. I wanted to go get her and bring her into bed, but I’m guessing that should be worked out between the cat and kitten? I feel like i'm making my cat jealous since the kitten follows us into bed.

Anyways, if anyone has any experience, it would be nice to know if they are progressing in a good way. At times, I’m very relieved and happy as they seem like they are tolerating each other. At other times, I worry that my cat will never return to our bed, or be as playful as before. The hissing and growling makes me believe that she will never be comfortable with the kitten. The kitten tries to play with her, but she doesn’t follow. When we lived at another house with a cat, they eventually played with each other and slept close together with no hissing.

Thanks again, and sorry for the long posts. I’m just worried .
post #8 of 14
It sounds to me like it's progressing as well as can be expected. When your older cat realized that the kitten is there to stay, that it means her no harm, and will even help keep her warm on cold nights, she will likely resume her old habits.
post #9 of 14
Thread Starter 
I can't tell you how much of a relief that is to hear. I just can't tell as sometimes the cat seems fine with the kitten. But then she'll take a step back and not be so nice. It seemed to me like she was forgetting about it, but then remembering that she didn't like it. I'm hoping that will stop over the next couple of weeks. Does this process normally take quite a while?
post #10 of 14
It can take as much as 3 months with some cats; 3 minutes with others.

Our Punkin never slept on the bed, so when Sterling came and wanted to, it didn't make any difference to him. Ella then appeared, and Sterling has had a hard time with her dominance and wanting to play with him. It all works out, in the end.
post #11 of 14
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the examples. I'm really hoping my cat will come around, but it almost seems like i'm getting mixed signals. Sometimes she's good, and sometimes she's bad with the kitten. Today was the first day that she came the closest to hitting it in the face. Thankfully they have not fought seriously and it seems more like she is telling the kitten to get away. She used to do the same in our old place (with the other cat) so I believe this is normal.
post #12 of 14
At the shelter where I volunteer we took in a 2 yr old male 14 months ago. We named him Terry. He was extremely shy around both people and other cats. He hissed and growled and hid from both people and cats. We tried everything to tame him. We finally tamed him some where some of us could pet him but he still hid in a cupboard all the time except to eat and drink. One morning about 2 weeks ago the director and I entered the kitchen area of the shelter and started getting ready to feed the morning canned food. As was usual we had about 60 cats trying to help. As I was opening more cans the director said " O my gosh, look on the table" There was Terry snuggling in a box with two other cats. I reached over to pet him and he stood on his hind legs and put his paws on my chest so I could scratch him behind the ears. It was if after 14 months he decided if you can't beat em then join em!
There are still days where he sleeps in his cupboard but most of the time is very socialable. The change in him just amazed us all. Some cats just take longer than others to work things out so don't give up.
post #13 of 14
Thread Starter 
I love hearing stories like this. Good for Terry .

The worry I have is my cat used to be very playful. I gave in way to much and played with her far too often. It's funny because now I really miss it! I guess I'm just trying to figure out if she's still going to playful after the next couple of weeks or if she will forever be nervous around the kitten.

Thanks again!


Quote:
Originally Posted by jkat62 View Post
At the shelter where I volunteer we took in a 2 yr old male 14 months ago. We named him Terry. He was extremely shy around both people and other cats. He hissed and growled and hid from both people and cats. We tried everything to tame him. We finally tamed him some where some of us could pet him but he still hid in a cupboard all the time except to eat and drink. One morning about 2 weeks ago the director and I entered the kitchen area of the shelter and started getting ready to feed the morning canned food. As was usual we had about 60 cats trying to help. As I was opening more cans the director said " O my gosh, look on the table" There was Terry snuggling in a box with two other cats. I reached over to pet him and he stood on his hind legs and put his paws on my chest so I could scratch him behind the ears. It was if after 14 months he decided if you can't beat em then join em!
There are still days where he sleeps in his cupboard but most of the time is very socialable. The change in him just amazed us all. Some cats just take longer than others to work things out so don't give up.
post #14 of 14
Thread Starter 
Hi all,

Sorry to bump this old thread but I wanted to update people. I found that the cat and kitten were making alot of progress. Last Thursday they even chased each other around the house for like 10 minutes. I was thrilled.

Fast forward to tonight and they still have not played anywhere near that amount. They will go about 1 round of chasing every once in a while but not back in forth like last Thursday. Is it possible that they are getting worse and not getting along as much anymore.

It's hard as I went from being thrilled to being down. My cat seems to growl each time the kitten chases it and goes underneath the table.

Anyways, i'm holding out hope that it will get better, but wanted to see if anyone else has similar experiences.

Thank you!!!
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