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- Jun 25, 2005
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I have two cats, a mother (Cathy) and daughter (Phoebe). Cathy showed up on my front porch as a very friendly stray in September 2004, so I took her in and of course she took over the house. A few months later, I came home from work, she ran out the door as soon as I opened it, I couldn't catch her, and she came back three nights later smoking a proverbial cigarette. She had a litter of six kittens 10 weeks later.
After the kittens were weaned, I placed an ad in the paper to give them away, and when it got down to the last two kittens, the one that had the poofiest fur ended up being the last one left because she wouldn't let anyone besides me near her. I had been present literally from the moment she was born (in the kitchen, with me helping Cathy do her Lamaze breathing and standing by as the kittens came out--well, almost.
).
So here it is almost four years later, and of the dozens of people I've had in my apartment since she was born, Phoebe has only let about two or three other people anywhere near her, hiding under furniture the rest of the time and refusing to let anyone else come near her, hissing at them if they try. And then as soon as they leave, Phoebe comes bounding up to me and jumping in my lap as if nothing happened.
The pivotal moment came last week when my long-distance girlfriend (we met last year online) got to come to my place for a visit for the first time. I figured there would be issues with Phoebe and my girlfriend, so figuring that both Cathy and Phoebe would meet me at the top of the stairs when I got home (my front door is at the bottom of a stairway, with stairs immediately inside the front door and two doors on opposite ends of the landing at the top), I called the two of them to me, then closed the two doors at the top of the landing and then had my girlfriend come inside. That's when things got interesting.
Cathy loves people and just came right up to my girlfriend, nuzzling her and purring and demanding a belly-rub. Phoebe, on the other hand, bolted behind boxes that were at the top of the stairs, and when I tiptoed slowly over toward her, talking softly and telling her it was going to be OK, I picked her up gently and started walking over to where my girlfriend was sitting at the top of the stairs. Phoebe started this very loud, mournful half-cry, half-whine and jumped out of my arms and ran back behind the boxes. So I repeated my steps, but this time didn't pick Phoebe up but grabbed her gently behind her front legs and guided her gently over to where my girlfriend was sitting. My GF reached out to pet Phoebe, and I could feel every muscle in Phoebe's body tense up even though my GF was also talking very softly and petting Phoebe just the way she liked to be petted (Phoebe, not my girlfriend
). I didn't want my girlfriend to stay at the top of the stairs the whole time, so I opened the door, Phoebe bolted through it and proceeded to hide under the chair she usually hides under when people come over. So after giving my GF a tour of the apartment, we walked back to the front room, I told my GF which chair I thought Phoebe might be hiding under, so my GF went over, lifted up the fabric on the front of the chair, and there was Phoebe, who promptly hissed at my GF--not the way I'm wanting to start this relationship between my GF and my extended family.
Phoebe has been acting this way around every other human besides me for as long as I can remember. She'll turn 4 (in human years) on May 2. What can I do, if anything, to help acclimate Phoebe to other people? It's kind of hard to acclimate her to other people when she's always hiding under furniture when they come over.
After the kittens were weaned, I placed an ad in the paper to give them away, and when it got down to the last two kittens, the one that had the poofiest fur ended up being the last one left because she wouldn't let anyone besides me near her. I had been present literally from the moment she was born (in the kitchen, with me helping Cathy do her Lamaze breathing and standing by as the kittens came out--well, almost.
So here it is almost four years later, and of the dozens of people I've had in my apartment since she was born, Phoebe has only let about two or three other people anywhere near her, hiding under furniture the rest of the time and refusing to let anyone else come near her, hissing at them if they try. And then as soon as they leave, Phoebe comes bounding up to me and jumping in my lap as if nothing happened.
The pivotal moment came last week when my long-distance girlfriend (we met last year online) got to come to my place for a visit for the first time. I figured there would be issues with Phoebe and my girlfriend, so figuring that both Cathy and Phoebe would meet me at the top of the stairs when I got home (my front door is at the bottom of a stairway, with stairs immediately inside the front door and two doors on opposite ends of the landing at the top), I called the two of them to me, then closed the two doors at the top of the landing and then had my girlfriend come inside. That's when things got interesting.
Cathy loves people and just came right up to my girlfriend, nuzzling her and purring and demanding a belly-rub. Phoebe, on the other hand, bolted behind boxes that were at the top of the stairs, and when I tiptoed slowly over toward her, talking softly and telling her it was going to be OK, I picked her up gently and started walking over to where my girlfriend was sitting at the top of the stairs. Phoebe started this very loud, mournful half-cry, half-whine and jumped out of my arms and ran back behind the boxes. So I repeated my steps, but this time didn't pick Phoebe up but grabbed her gently behind her front legs and guided her gently over to where my girlfriend was sitting. My GF reached out to pet Phoebe, and I could feel every muscle in Phoebe's body tense up even though my GF was also talking very softly and petting Phoebe just the way she liked to be petted (Phoebe, not my girlfriend
Phoebe has been acting this way around every other human besides me for as long as I can remember. She'll turn 4 (in human years) on May 2. What can I do, if anything, to help acclimate Phoebe to other people? It's kind of hard to acclimate her to other people when she's always hiding under furniture when they come over.