Roommates....

carolina

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Originally Posted by Dixie_Darlin

Does anyone have roommates?

If so, how do you split the living expenses?
Such as rent, utilities, food expenses and such like that?
I used to have a long time ago - everything was split in 1/2; my food was my food though, and roommie's food was her food - we had different cabinets, and things in the fridge were marked with our names.

I never had problems having roommates, it was actually fun...
 
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dixie_darlin

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Originally Posted by carolinalima

I used to have a long time ago - everything was split in 1/2; my food was my food though, and roommie's food was her food - we had different cabinets, and things in the fridge were marked with our names.

I never had problems having roommates, it was actually fun...
I'm thinking that we are going to have to do that here also



We're having a bit of a problem with a few things here that Brandon and I are taking offense to.

Basically have been the one cooking every night, with our food. They haven't contributed much since they moved in 3 weeks ago. A gallon of milk here, eggs and butter once also.
Brandon and I have been doing the dishes after every meal too.

Also, we fronted the money to move and are expecting money back this weekend.

Oh, and what about the cleaning? I mean I clean up after Brandon, myself and the boys but what about the general cleaning of the kitchen, living room and bathroom?
 

carolina

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The dishes situation was each one is responsible for their own. For cleaning, one week it was my time to clean the general areas, and the other week it was hers. Sometimes we did it together.
 

natalie_ca

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I used to have a room-mate, twice actually! Never, ever again!

The first time I moved in with a girl I went to school with. She had told me that her sister was going to be moving out. Well, 4 months after I moved in the sister was still there and showed no signs of moving. In the meantime I was sleeping on the couch!

Both of them also gave keys to the apartment to everyone they knew! Or so it seemed! Everyone in their family had a key, plus both of their boy friends had keys and even some "acquaintances" had keys! I lost count of how many times I was sitting on the couch watching TV, or in bed (couch) sleeping and some "stranger" would come in.

They also had frequent over night guests...their boy friends who were practically living there!

They were also complete pigs! Neither of them did their dishes after cooking, so when I wanted to cook I had to wash dishes! And the bathroom was so gross!

They also didn't respect boundaries of whose food was whose.

The next time I had a room-mate was when I agreed to move into a friend's house with her because she was having trouble paying her mortgage. What a disaster that was!!! Again, she was a complete pig when it came to cleaning. She didn't go shopping, instead she would eat the food I bought for myself, and even share it with her son when he came to visit, always promising to replace it, but never did.

I found the best arrangement I had was when I lived with my friend's family for about a year. I paid them a monthly amount for room and board. That included my room/living area plus 3 meals per day.
 
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dixie_darlin

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Linda,

Alot of that is happening here also.

I keep getting excuses as to why they don't have money when I see them spending their money on things they don't need.

Last weekend they said they couldn't pay the $100 they owed because they had to put new tires and parts on the car. But before the car even broke down she bought a brand new bathing suit for $40 and they went out to eat all weekend on top of me cooking dinner the whole time. So they were eating twice.
Oh and did I mention it was the groceries WE paid for?


They bought toilet paper about 4 days after they moved in (after using all of ours) and were hiding it in their bedroom and rationing it out.


We've asked them several times to not take food into the bedroom and they still do and leave the dirty dishes laying all around.

Last night they royally ticked me off!

She came out of the bedroom and asked what we were cooking for dinner.
Brandon told them Ramen Noodles on purpose because we're tired of carrying them.
The next thing we know, they went to Walmart and bought a huge chicken out of the deli. When they got home, she went into the bedroom and slammed the door.
After they left for work last night I heard Sammy in their bedroom. When I opened the door, I seen the box to the chicken on the floor and dishes all over the room!


So it's obvious that they're just going to do for themselves and don't care about us!

Since the day they moved in, we've made sure they've eaten with us at every meal. Especially since she's pregnant.

We've even let them borrow our car to go to work because theirs is a gas guzzler.

I've been nothing but nice to them but I am starting to see that they're freeloaders.

I really hate this too because he's been a good friend of mine for a very long time
and I see the problem isn't really him.
It's her.
He works 3rd shift delievering newspapers and she goes with him to ride along. From what he told me she sleeps in the car the whole time. But when they get home at 5am he goes to bed. She will go in the room with him but doesn't sleep.
It irritates me because she doesn't offer to help with anything around the house.
She does make it a point to tell me the toilet needs to be cleaned or dishes need to be washed but doesn't offer to help with any of this


One time I have asked her to do something and she blew up on me and told me to not treat her like a child


Sooooooo I don't know what to do or how to approach this... Any advice?

Their names aren't on the lease either.
 

emrldsky

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Nuh uh...might give me away!
This is tough, but have you talked to your friend about it, privately? If you're really good friends, he may already see this taking place. And it seems like HE needs to be the one to talk to her about all of these issues.

I'm sorry that you're in such a tight spot!!!
 
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dixie_darlin

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Originally Posted by emrldsky

This is tough, but have you talked to your friend about it, privately? If you're really good friends, he may already see this taking place. And it seems like HE needs to be the one to talk to her about all of these issues.

I'm sorry that you're in such a tight spot!!!
Yea, I mentioned it to him one night when we went to the store
I told him that it needs to be 50/50. Well, since then HE is the one doing everything while she literally sits on her rear end.
Now, I understand she's pregnant but I also know what it's like to be pregnant.
Perfect example is day before yesterday. I told her "Please try to keep the dishes out of your room"
She rolled her eyes as she walked away and said "I'm not a
kid"

Oh I was hot!
I told her that not ONCE have I ever disrespected her since they moved in and I thought it was very immature of her to roll her eyes and make snide little remarks as she walked away.
It caused a huge arguement and I told her the reason I haven't said anything to her was to keep from this happening and that's why I went to her boyfriend.
Apparently he never said anything about it and he was the one doing all of these things and not her.
Then Wed night Brandon asked her to do the dishes because WE had bought all the groceries AND cooked dinner. She said she would get to them. Well, they were sitting there the next morning.
He asked her again, she said there was no hot water left and would get to them... I ended up doing the dishes myself!


I'm thinking it might be better to just ask them to pay what they owe and move out

They owe us over $500 for the last 3 weeks... and that's not including groceries. Thats for half the ulitities at the other house, half the deposit to move into the new house, and half of the rental truck to move.

I may never see the money
 

gailc

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I think I would concur withyour thoughts on getting them to move out.

They don't seem to know how to handle money and I think its not going to improve.

You would hate to lose a friend over this but from what you have described-she seems to be a big problem and your friend, her boyfriend appears to let her do whatever she wants.

Give them a couple weeks to find a new place-a firm deadline but no more $$ as you are right you may not see what they owe unless you work out a payment schedule.
Sounds like she needs to find a job too.
 

zooy

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Roommates... never again
I've had 2.
The first one was great, it was in residence so we didn't have to pay for anything. Food wise, she bought her food, I bought mine. It was fine.
Then when I got my own apt, we lived with a guy. We split everything into thirds even though boyfriend and I shared a room. He didn't help, had girls over all the time. even went as far to comment that the maid did a horrible job... then I thought, we don't have a maid.
It was a very bitter ending of the school year, I kicked him out for being well... a jerk.

Then the next year, I was moving back home with my parents, so my fiance invited my first roommate to move back. She was good for the first bit but totally took advantage of my fiance. He did all the work, she didn't do anything. When I said we were moving, she just became bitter about it. Gave us the cheque for last months rent, then when we cashed it to pay the mover, she cancelled the cheque. Leaving us $400 in the whole.

So, for roommates here are my suggestions:
Talk about what you guys are both paying
If your name is on the lease, ask for cash to pay rent, don't take cheques (too easy to cancel)
Don't take crap.
 
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dixie_darlin

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Originally Posted by GailC

I think I would concur withyour thoughts on getting them to move out.

They don't seem to know how to handle money and I think its not going to improve.

You would hate to lose a friend over this but from what you have described-she seems to be a big problem and your friend, her boyfriend appears to let her do whatever she wants.

Give them a couple weeks to find a new place-a firm deadline but no more $$ as you are right you may not see what they owe unless you work out a payment schedule.
Sounds like she needs to find a job too.
You're right. I don't think it's going to improve.

Originally it was supposed to be just him that moved in. I had no problem with that. He's a hardworking guy and we've never had not even the first arguement in all the years we've known each other.
She was just kind of an added bonus.
I don't know her that well but she is considerably younger then him and I.
She claims she's lead a rough life and all but at this point I'm thinking it wasn't as rough as she says. Its more of a situation to where if she doesn't get what she wants she has hissy fits and throws threats at my friend about leaving him.
 

gailc

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Well she seems like a spoiled princess!

Look at the rough patches you have had in your life and how well you have worked to overcome them.

And she's pregnant-how is she going to handle motherhood and a baby if she can't even pick up after herself?? Yikes.
 

gardenandcats

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I think its time for them to move out. I would not buy anymore food for them. as probably they won't be paying you back what they all ready owe you. I'd sit them both down and just explain as nicely as you can that this just isn't working out.. Give them two weeks to find other living arrangements and thats that!
You have enough on your plate without taking on more problems..
 
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dixie_darlin

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Originally Posted by GailC

Well she seems like a spoiled princess!

Look at the rough patches you have had in your life and how well you have worked to overcome them.

And she's pregnant-how is she going to handle motherhood and a baby if she can't even pick up after herself?? Yikes.
You guys are right... They're not paying anything... I just confronted them...
 

keycube

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Yeah, I have five roommates. Their pictures are posted in my profile. Never do a damn thing; just lie around all day, eat, wrestle on occasion. They seem to think everything I have is just here for their amusement. Oh, wait...it is.


You'll never convince me that people were meant to cohabitate. Whether married, friends, acquaintances, whatever; there's always gamesmanship and exploitation.

Whether it requires a 2nd (or 3rd) job, bank heist, prostitution, or what have you - ANYTHING is better than having a roommate.
 

forensic

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We split rent, one pays cable, one pays electric, and both pay their own phone.

Chores and typically done together. Cleaning's the biggest issue here, but we knew it would be (she's a neatnic and I'm... less so.)

'course the dog and cats don't do squat.
 
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dixie_darlin

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Originally Posted by Keycube

Yeah, I have five roommates. Their pictures are posted in my profile. Never do a damn thing; just lie around all day, eat, wrestle on occasion. They seem to think everything I have is just here for their amusement. Oh, wait...it is.


You'll never convince me that people were meant to cohabitate. Whether married, friends, acquaintances, whatever; there's always gamesmanship and exploitation.

Whether it requires a 2nd (or 3rd) job, bank heist, prostitution, or what have you - ANYTHING is better than having a roommate.
It's not so much that we're hurting for money, it's more that I know they needed the help. They were kicked out of his sister's house and had no place to go. I'm begining to see why
 

capt_jordi

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Yep I have one. We usually split the bills down the center but the past few months its been one has paid this one and the other has paid the next.
Rent is split in half.
Groceries we usually go to the store together and keep a rough estimate going and split the cart up between 2 orders.
Cleaning ha... well... yeah it doesnt happen often. When it does its done together and we both do our parts (and con our friends into helping mauhahaha)
 

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It may be worth it to get rid of them and lose the money. This is a terrible way to live and I would not stand for it very much longer....they have to go.
 

larussa

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Whether it requires a 2nd (or 3rd) job, bank heist, prostitution, or what have you - ANYTHING is better than having a roommate.

LOL LOL, I totally agree with you, well maybe not the prosititution.
 
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