My DH likes to travel; I hate it. Since 2001, he & our daughter have gone to Florida (with his Mom & step-Dad) 4 times. The first time he'd just received a bonus at work and I came up with some extra spending money for him (my Mom's Christmas gift to both of us was cash), so he didn't put much on the credit card. The next 3 times he went, the Visa card was smoking when he got home. (yes, I'm still paying on it) I finally told him the last time he went (2007) that if & when he went again he HAD to have the cash to pay for it, that the credit card wasn't making another trip. He agreed, and even promised that he wouldn't go again unless I went with him (even tho' I've told him repeatedly that I will not go, for several reasons) When I suggest taking a shorter trip to somewhere I might like to see his response is always, "I went there when I was a kid; it's boring."
So last night DD and I were talking about her taking some college classes during the summer. She asked, "Are we going on vacation?" I told her she'd have to ask her Dad. That opened a huge can of worms; he hasn't saved enough money to go unless he shortens the trip to 1 week instead of 2 (which he won't do). He thinks I'll go with them if he pressures me enough, and travel with his Mom! I flat out told him there was no way in hell I was going on the road for 2 weeks with his folks.
I think he's expecting me to come up with more money for him but I can't do it. I resent all the money he's spent on his vacations (I've tried to tell him that we could have taken a trip to Ireland for all the money he's spent, but he doesn't seem to care) When he & his Mom start planning their trips they act as if it's a big secret and they can't tell me because I'll get upset. I get upset when DH DOESN'T tell me until the last minute. When they get back that's all they talk about for months, while I sit there like an idiot, neither knowing nor caring about this or that ride at Disneyworld.
Am I being unreasonable to expect him to be able to actually pay for a vacation? I truly could come up with the extra cash for him if I had to, but there are so many other things that need to be taken care of around the house that I just can't say, "Here honey, knock yourself out." He doesn't even realize it, but he mentions Florida in some way EVERY day. I've pointed it out to him, and he seems so surprised. I'm sick of Florida, I'm sick of hearing about it, I'm sick of spending money every month to pay off his trips.
So, am I a horrible wife for not giving in?
So last night DD and I were talking about her taking some college classes during the summer. She asked, "Are we going on vacation?" I told her she'd have to ask her Dad. That opened a huge can of worms; he hasn't saved enough money to go unless he shortens the trip to 1 week instead of 2 (which he won't do). He thinks I'll go with them if he pressures me enough, and travel with his Mom! I flat out told him there was no way in hell I was going on the road for 2 weeks with his folks.
I think he's expecting me to come up with more money for him but I can't do it. I resent all the money he's spent on his vacations (I've tried to tell him that we could have taken a trip to Ireland for all the money he's spent, but he doesn't seem to care) When he & his Mom start planning their trips they act as if it's a big secret and they can't tell me because I'll get upset. I get upset when DH DOESN'T tell me until the last minute. When they get back that's all they talk about for months, while I sit there like an idiot, neither knowing nor caring about this or that ride at Disneyworld.
Am I being unreasonable to expect him to be able to actually pay for a vacation? I truly could come up with the extra cash for him if I had to, but there are so many other things that need to be taken care of around the house that I just can't say, "Here honey, knock yourself out." He doesn't even realize it, but he mentions Florida in some way EVERY day. I've pointed it out to him, and he seems so surprised. I'm sick of Florida, I'm sick of hearing about it, I'm sick of spending money every month to pay off his trips.
So, am I a horrible wife for not giving in?