The Right to Die

Thats an interesting subject. I feel we have double standards when it comes to the way we believe it's humane to put a terminal beloved pet to sleep but it's murder to euthanize a human being. If I was terminally ill with cancer and the only thing that was keeping my pain at bay were heavy narcotics, I would want to have the option whether I wanted to end my suffering in a painless manner.

I want to have the option of ending my own life if I choose to. In fact, I frequently think about how best to ensure that I am able to do just that when and if the time comes. And, of course, as long as I am physically and mentally able to do it, there would be nothing to stop me.

But, life insurance won't pay out if the policy holder commits suicide.

And it gets more complicated if the person wishing to die requires assistance to do the deed. How to do it without someone being charged with murder? How to give someone the right to assist without the possibility of the right being abused?

It's not an easy topic.

I worry that someone would be doped up - NOT lucid - and beg to be killed. Then there is the family issue - I mean realistically, it is murder - it would be incredibly difficult to define murder vs. assisted suicide. Just, the technicalities of it all. I truthfully, think people do have the right to die - but the legalities of it all.

I 100% support the right to die. If a slow painful death was inevitable, then I would choose to be "euthanized" just as I would choose to help my parents should it ever come to that.

Katie, I agree that people should have the right to die. BUT I know that at this time I could NEVER assist either one of my parents with their decision to end their life. I couldn't do it.

I agree. I've lost both parents and when my mom was terminally ill, I took care of her in a home hospice situation. It's interesting that the hospice workers explained to us more than once what the lethal dose of morphine would be. It was explained in the way that if she were to take this amount of this medication, with her condition it could kill her. It was the knowing smile that came with it that told us that this would be a decision that we may need to make on her behalf. My siblings and I had this discussion and understood that mom didn't want to live her remaining days in severe pain. We were all prepared to administer her the dose if she got that bad. She died before the pain became unliveable, so fortunately we didn't have to make that final decision. She was in a coma the night she died but something in her gave her the strength to call out to me as I kissed her goodnight that night. In that moment, I know she put her life in my hands.

I don't think that you can honestly answer this question unless you have actually faced this decision with a close family member. It's very easy to call it murder. I have, and know that I support and will always support the right to die a dignified death.

Absolutely. I know a lot of people argue that that's what hospice care is for, but you have to see first-hand that there are limits to it before being able to make an informed decision.

Italy now has its own Terri Schiavo case:
Italian right-to-die move blocked

Home hospice care is a bit different. The family is the primary caregivers with constant support from home hospice visitors. You see things first hand that would normally be managed out of site/out of mind from the family. For example, we were the ones to find out that mom's bones were so fragile from the bone cancer, that when we went to lift her up to put her in a wheel chair, we broke her ribs. If that doesn't shock a dose of reality in you, nothing ever will. Maybe a hospice worker would have know better on how to lift a patient, but we would not have understood how fragile mom actually was.

And sorry to sound morbid about all of this, we did just pass the anniversary of her death a few weeks back and its still a bit raw.

Right and that is why I said "At this time" because who is to say what will happen if I am ever put in that position. I just don't know.

I do know that as of right now I would feel like I had killed my mother if I were to help her. That doesn't mean I feel that way in Terri Schiavo case or anyone else's case either.

I think that's the times where something I read about would be good. A medical Power of Attorney. Someone with no family ties, nothing to be financially gained, that would carry out our medical wishes. Not just deathbed wishes, but any serious medical decision like repeated surgeries, chemo treatments, etc. where the outcome would be marginal. It would extend beyond the wishes expressed in a Living Will.

Recommendations for someone to choose would be a Sunday school teacher, a personal banker, lawyer, etc. Someone with the ability to comprehend the medical terminology as explained, but not get caught up in the emotional aspects and make a decision based on them.

I can see where that would take the burden of "I killed them" off of family members, as well as making sure that no extra care was extended if it wasn't wanted.

I've not done much research on it, but it sounds like a solution that would work for many people who wanted to relieve their family of the guilt that would have to come with such a decision.

I absolutely don't judge anyone for their opinion on this topic and I'm sorry if anyone has interpreted my comment as a personal attack. My memories of the experience were renewed with the anniversary and my emotions are quite raw right now.

A hospice worker came out to the house to bathe my mom a few days before she died. She was in a coma by then, and I was helping the worker. She told me that she had to turn her over to wash her back, and in doing so, she might stop breathing and die. In a completely surreal moment, I looked down the hallway at my sister in the living room who was busy chatting away with my brother, looked back at the hospice worker, and simply said OK. I then helped the worker turn my mother over. Tears could wait for another time.

Later that day I went outside to have a smoke with my sister. I told her what happened and her eyes got wide, then admitted that she would not have been able to do that. This is why mom called out to me the night she died. She instilled her strength in me for those hard times in life and knew she could trust me with the hard decisions.

So I guess my point in all of this, is that the decision could be very easy for some and impossible for others. But I think that if the person making that choice is the one that understands the person the best, then it becomes easier. I am my mother. I could make that choice.


And folks, this thread is becoming a catharsis for me. Thank you for listening.

I think you should be able to fill something out in a hospital if you are checked in with a terminal disease... Like today you can write DNR, you would be able to give yourself an expiration date, or circumstance... I am absolutely in favor of assisted "suicide"; I think it is the person's choice to live or die, and to chose to live their last days with no pain and some quality of life... A person has the right and the means to commit suicide anytime, so why not when they are terminal and dieing anyways? We don't let our kitties suffer, yet we are supposed to let our loved ones suffer an excruciating death? It just doesn't make sense to me...
Last year, on my grandpa's birthday/family reunion, my mom called the three of us kids, and told us that if she ever got into a position where she was not independent and suffering from dementia, she wants us to put an end to her suffering... I said I would never do it, my sister said a four letter word, and my brother agreed to take the task on his hand... I can not even think about that day coming....

I believe everyone should have the right to die as they wish - IF suffering very badly.

I couldn't assist though, I'm not strong enough for that either. I've watched my Granddad die a long slow death [His doctor told him not to buy a new shirt ever again in 1990] well he's been gone for 5 years now.

I thought so to.

I found these online.

http://www.mamashealth.com/patient/medicalpower.asp

http://www.free-legal-document.com/m...-attorney.html

And there's something I hadn't thought of: making sure the person isn't a member of a medical provider being used. I guess they could possibly be influenced to prolong your care for financial gain for the care facility? Hopefully no one would be that crass, but a good idea from a legal standpoint, really.

People do make living wills, but that's a little different. With the Terry Schiavo case though, that is something that could have been settled with a living will if she had had one. If the person is in a vegitative state then a living will can help decide whether to pull the plug...If someone is terminally ill and in pain, but there is no life support then it's illegal to assist in suicide. With drugs though, isn't it possible to live one's final days without much pain at all??? I think it's a really hard decision....and seeing someone suffer of course one would think it's be better if the person was dead rather than going thru so much suffering. But to assist in suicide? I think it's a lot more than just being able to logically assess a situation and say the suffering is so bad their life should be ended. But doing it single handedly, I think many people would hesitate..

I am looking at this from a healthcare worker's viewpoint and I really don't like this. I know that someone that is not family might be a little less emotional about it, but how could you put the "burden of "I killed them"" on someone that is not a family member? If it was me, I would feel so incredibly guilty deciding someone I was not related to's right to die and I would not be able to make that decision. I completely agree it should not be someone that is involved with a healthcare facility. Too many ways for that to be abused! That being said, i firmly believe that people should have the option of euthanasia. As someone else said, we can do it for our pets and I consider my pets family. The best way to take care of a situation like this without having the controversy of someone else deciding to "kill" a person, would be for people to fill out a Living Will. I always encourage my patient's to fill out a Living will when i admit them to the hospital. You can put any restrictions you want and this is YOUR wishes. Of course, there can be problems with this as well when families decide not to respect the person's wishes (I have had to stand up to families before for trying to do something that was against the person's Living Will). With a Living Will, a caveat could be included to inform whoever read it the person's belief about assisted suicide. Of course, a living will has to be drawn up while the person is completely lucid or it is worthless. Personally I would rather have a Living Will then put the decision of whether I should die on a stranger's, or even my family's, shoulders.

the way I look at this is that to allow my parent pass away pecefully without pain and suffering would be like the ultimate gift or the ultimate act of unselfishness. It would be incredibly difficult to do though

Luckily I have never been in this situation yet, the closest I have been is when my grandma was very weak from chemo, she fell in the tub and hit her head. I was 12 years old and I was the one who found her. The whole thing is kind of a blur, but after that she was completely incoherent and in a lot of pain and thankfully she passed away very quickly after that. She had instructions that no heroic measures were to be used and my mom followed those instructions, I know it broke her heart but to leave my grandma in that condition for however long with machines was just wrong.

Another situation was my ex's grandma. His Mom kept her alive much much longer than she should have and she did it for herself, because she didn't want to lose her mom. It was truly awful I think that this particular situation really strengthened my view on the right to die

I actually did it for my mom, unknowingly. She had stage 4 cervical cancer that had metastisized to her bones, and finally to her brain. Her last 3 days she was getting high dosages of morphine, and the nurses told me she didn't have much time. The last day, I went up to the hospital and she was very agitated. I went out to the nurses station and was told the NA's just repositioned her to prevent bedsores. After I asked if they could give her something to calm her down (she was trying to rip off her oxygen mask, etc), the nurse gave her another dose of morphine.

She slipped away peacefully about 20 minutes later.

After I spent some time with her, I went out to let the nurse know and she said "I thought that last dose would push her over the edge". Now, whether she meant to say that outloud, or forgot she was talking to the patients daughter, I don't know. At first I was shocked, and I did kinda think that my request killed my mom. But, after I thought about it, I didn't regret it at all. I hated seeing my mom being in that much pain and there was NO chance of recovery. Could I have honestly requested it had I known? I don't know. Probably not, but who knows.

This really sounds like a good idea but my bet would be that somebody in the family would end up suing whoever makes the decision. The power of attorneys might keep that from being successful but you can at least file a lawsuit for anything and it would cost the person a lot in defence and fees just to get it dismissed.

I was against euthanasia, and still am unless it's really necessary, as in a painful terminal illness.

My brother died in agony last june from lung and bone cancer and the strongest painkillers had no effect on him. The last 24 hours were, in my sister in laws words horrendous, and the night before he died i prayed to my mum and dad to come and get him so he wouldn't suffer anymore. Thankfully my prayers were answered because he was gone the next day

My views on euthanasia changed slightly after that, because no one should be allowed to suffer, especially when they know theres no cure for them

Could i be the one to give them a lethal dose to end their suffering?. Yes, i really think i could after my experience of seeing my brother in pain

Both my parents died when they were fairly young from cancer. By fairly young, I mean in their 60s. Both knew they were dying, and had months to take care of addressing what measures they wanted taken to prolong or end their lives. Neither addressed the issue. So when I was asked to make a decision on whether to withhold care that would end my mother's life after she went into a coma, I opted to keep her alive, but comfortable. I knew in my heart she wouldn't want to live that way, but she failed to give a clear directive. Maybe it's my fault for not pushing the issue, but it's hard to push people who are fighting for their lives for an answer, especially when you know it's a fight they won't win.

If a friend or family member asked for my help, and I could so do without landing myself in jail, I would do whatever I could ... short of taking their lives myself, to help them. Of course, I would have to believe there was no hope.

I absolutely believe in the right to die with dignity. Could I take an active hand in hastening a loved one's end, if they asked me to? I don't know. I won't know unless I ever find myself in that situation. But I would never pass judgement on another for doing so.

This is a question I struggle with without coming to a resolution. As I'm getting older, and as I have a chronic health condition, I become increasingly aware of how, well, I don't know a nice way to put it; how not worth living life can become in the final years of one's life. On the one hand, I believe that life is precious and I believe that God gives life and God takes life away. On the other hand, I don't believe in preserving life at any cost. Yes, life is precious, life cannot be valued in terms of dollars and cents. And yet, there comes a point at which there's just no point. And for those who use their religion as an argument against a right to die, I'm just not so sure at this point that can be justified. I'm going to have to study it some more. Maybe it's not right to commit suicide, but on the other hand, I'm beginning to think that it's all right to just allow life to cease existing when it's near its end anyway, when continuing to live just causes pain and suffering, and yes, even when in terms of dollars and cents it would reduce a person and their family to penury. I don't see anything wrong with just pulling the plug and allowing God to take away the life He gave. And if death is inevitable and the time is right, is it really all that much different to just decline health care, perhaps even decline food and water that would keep one alive past a time when one would want to be alive? How about declining oxygen? I don't know. I don't think it's set in stone for me, yet.

As far as legislation enabling people to make their own decisions, I think we have to be careful that the decisions ARE left in THEIR hands, and not made by anyway else, doctor, legislator. If they're not competent to make that decision, and they didn't leave a Living Will, then maybe that decision just ought not to be made. In other words, I could support legislation permitting right to die as a personal decision; I could not support legislation regulating it, defining it, controlling it, delegating it, or enforcing it.

Completely agree!!

Oregon has a Death-with-Dignity Act.

If my mom were in horrible pain that no drugs could help, I would like to think I could help her to a peaceful passing. I know I don't want her to suffer. She spent her life working as a nurse's aid and has seen people screaming to die. I do not want that for her.