I am so miserable right now. I lost 5 cats since the middle of December one from the cold and and 3 from an FIP outbreak and an older cat. Now tonight one of the ferals I have been feeding for years was hit by a car, and we were there-though we didn't know it even happened at first. A lady picked up the cat, said it was breathing, and gave her to me, but my baby was in bad shape! I put her in our truck,and then she was gone...I NEVER wanted the time I would finally hold her to be when she died!! I always hoped to bring her in and domesticate her and give her the life she deserved. I have 5 of her babies, three almost six month olds and two 15 month olds-all males. I feel absolutely horrible and can't understand why this even happened. Last year she went through hell with a man that was trapping her and others with her. They took her mate and he likely died one way or another. Luckily, when she was trapped the spca found her and released her! ANd then we took her babies so they would not be at risk. She did eventually find a new mate and friends, and even the lady across the street began to feed her often. So much that she was no longer coming to the other side of the road,which was good for her. She looked healthy and put on some weight-looking the best ever. Unfortunately, she still crossed the road even with trying to sway her to stay on the one side. She was always very smart about it-but tonight she must have misjudged. And looking at her and seeing her in such bad shape will always be an image I won't forget. She trusted me and would come close to me-even more so last year before the b****** started trapping everyone. She had to battle this terrible winter (as well as the previous) only to end up in such tragedy. I feel absolutely horrible!! And having lost 6 cats in 7 weeks is just too much. I can't even get through one and then there is another. I don't know what the hell is going on!!Originally in this area there were 5 mother cats. We lost two in 2007 (either someone harmed them which was most likely or something happened). I took in 2 others the same year. This one today, she was the last female and had survived everything bad there-only to end like this. One thing is for sure (though still not 100% where diseases/illnesses are concerned) the best survival rate for cats is inside!! If I had taken her in sooner this could have been avoided. I was going to back in July when she was pregnant,but didn't because we ended up with multiple litters of kittens from July through December and finding another colony that was in depserate need of help also. She was very feral and happy outside anyway so it wasn't pressing. But now I will always regret not having been able to get her in!!!!!!!!!!!! She was lucky all along and probably did use her "9 lives" but it will never take away how much I love her and wanted to help her!!! It is painful to see her babies here and know that she isn't. I am sorry to ramble, I am just absolutely miserable this even happened...
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1/24/09 at 11:21pm