I have two ten month old cats (brother and sister) that I adopted together. They have always gotten along wonderfully. The male cat was very fond of my partner and the female cat of me. They loved each other a lot as well. My partner and I recently separated. After much debate about whether we should split the cats up, I decided to keep them together in our home. My partner was very sad, as he loves his cat.
The first few days when my partner left, the male cat seemed a little lost. His sister groomed him more than usual, laid with him and let him lay with her in on my side of the bed when we slept. It's now been three weeks since my ex left and dynamics have changed. The male cat seemed to bounce back, and replaced me with my ex. He started to sleep closer to my head, to the point where my little tortie (his sister) won't even come on my bed now. My tortie was extremely affectionate before, now she won't come near me.
I took her to the vet and he said that the male is just asserting his dominance. However, I am quite saddened by the whole thing. I love them both very much, but I miss my affectionate, loving tortie! It seems so against her nature to spend so much time alone, not sleeping with me, not greeting me, not answering my calls etc. I am also finding myself not responding as much to the male's shows of affection because I know the more affectionate towards me he is, the more distant my little tortie becomes.
The cats still seem to play together well, and they seem okay. I seem to be the issue. My question is: what should I do? Will this pass and will my tortie return to normal? Should I consider giving my ex the male cat? I love them both so much and I just want them to be happy. Right now, I feel like I am not making either one particularly happy (I'm afraid to show and accept too much affection from boy, and I am killing myself trying to remind the girl I love her).
Please help!
The first few days when my partner left, the male cat seemed a little lost. His sister groomed him more than usual, laid with him and let him lay with her in on my side of the bed when we slept. It's now been three weeks since my ex left and dynamics have changed. The male cat seemed to bounce back, and replaced me with my ex. He started to sleep closer to my head, to the point where my little tortie (his sister) won't even come on my bed now. My tortie was extremely affectionate before, now she won't come near me.
I took her to the vet and he said that the male is just asserting his dominance. However, I am quite saddened by the whole thing. I love them both very much, but I miss my affectionate, loving tortie! It seems so against her nature to spend so much time alone, not sleeping with me, not greeting me, not answering my calls etc. I am also finding myself not responding as much to the male's shows of affection because I know the more affectionate towards me he is, the more distant my little tortie becomes.
The cats still seem to play together well, and they seem okay. I seem to be the issue. My question is: what should I do? Will this pass and will my tortie return to normal? Should I consider giving my ex the male cat? I love them both so much and I just want them to be happy. Right now, I feel like I am not making either one particularly happy (I'm afraid to show and accept too much affection from boy, and I am killing myself trying to remind the girl I love her).
Please help!
