Hi there,
I have read a number of articles on cat behavior/aggression and introducing cats to one another. I don't know that my situation is "unique" except for the fact that so many things are going on all at once.
I was compelled to move in with my boyfriend, Jake, rather suddenly due to various real life issues. I could not part with my two spayed female cats (Angelica, a petite longhaired kitty who tends to be a bit nervous, and Jedi, a Siamese calico mix who is fairly unflappable), both of whom are quite friendly and reasonably well-behaved but used to being indoor/outdoor. My boyfriend was perfectly happy for me to bring them here.
Jake, too, has a cat that he has had since it was a kitten four years ago, a male named Neko. Neko was not socialized with other animals or other humans, and he's never left the apartment. He absolutely adores Jake, and both of them were accustomed to living a life of solitary bachelorhood before I came into the picture a year and a half ago. I was the first girl Jake ever had around much since he got Neko.
I am an animal person and used to gentle kittens and befriend feral cats when I was a kid living on a farm in Indiana... so I thought I had a fairly good handle on cat behavior. I took it slow with Neko. For a long time he was just timid around me... eventually he let me pet him and I thought everything would be roses after that, but seemingly quite suddenly he turned on me and has absolutely loathed me ever since. At the time he was not neutered. Neko became highly aggressive (hissing at me and then striking as soon as my back was turned, leaving pretty nasty scratches on my legs even through jeans) and at that point he also started spraying. So Jake finally got Neko neutered. This stopped the spraying, but did not stop the aggressive behavior.
I tried feeding Neko special food from a pouch to try to bribe him into liking me. He loves the food I got for him so much that he will dig into the garbage to get out the pouch and rip it open to lick it clean. It got to the point that whenever I went to the kitchen, Neko would be right there, rubbing against my legs as if he loved me, expecting me to feed him. But I couldn't give him that expensive food ALL the time. So then he'd get mad and hiss and scratch me because I didn't behave in the way he expected me to, I guess. Poor kitty, I'm sure he was confused.
Incidentally, Neko eats plastic. Like chews it up, swallows it and then barfs it back up if he finds any scraps anywhere... but he did this before I came into the picture. We try not to leave anything lying around, but occasionally he manages to find some. I read this is pica, and a sign of an anxiety problem... I'm sure the current living situation doesn't help that.
When I moved in here a little over a month ago, I pretty much came to accept the occasional scratch as a matter of course. This apartment is small, and Neko and I have a hard time staying out of each other's way. I try to be patient, and usually use a shirt or something to gently herd him out of the way when he's in my path. He walks across my desk sometimes on the way to see Jake (our desks are next to each other) and he will tolerate a bit of petting when that happens. Scratching has become less frequent, but sometimes he will strike very unexpectedly, and always when my back is turned. I have no idea what to do about this.
Unfortunately, the fact that I brought two cats with me has compounded the issue. Unsurprisingly, Neko doesn't like them (and they don't like him much either.) I put them in the bedroom and Neko stays in the other room... leaving the door open sometimes so they could try to get used to seeing each other. They have separate litterboxes and food. Well... my cats have established the bedroom as their territory and they don't venture out hardly at all even after a month. When they do, Neko chases them right back into the bedroom. Neko himself will sometimes go into the bedroom, and when that happens a minor fight will ensue with much hissing and growling and a bit of scratching. Neko has definitely scratched Angelica... on her nose, and on her neck. The scratches don't seem deep but I am worried! What if he gets her eye? I don't blame Neko for this... my cats haven't been particularly nice to him, either, but they're not being aggressive.
But I feel absolutely awful because I have two cats cooped up in a bedroom when they're used to going outside pretty regularly. I can't let them here -- the area is much busier/more urban and the apartment door opens into a hallway, not outside.
My cats love me and they adore Jake. I go into the bedroom often to spend time with them, but most of the time they just sit around in there with nothing to do (but they generally aren't meowing or complaining or anything). We'd all be happier, though, if all the cats felt welcome throughout the apartment. I can't stomach the idea of separating Neko and Jake. He gets so frustrated when Neko scratches me, but he loves his cat and I can tell how much he would regret giving him away. And I feel the same if not more so about my cats... but I am so worried about all of them and their happiness/quality of life... Hopefully in six months or so we will get a bigger place with access to the outdoors... but what do we do in the meantime?
We are poor and would have a very hard time finding money for expensive treatments... but we're open to doing what it takes. My thoughts at present are to fit all the cats with Soft Claws. Last week I put vanilla on them all and it didn't seem to have an effect. Maybe it was too late for that? Some people say Feliway is great, but others seem to report that it's ineffective... I want to know the odds on it helping before I invest that kind of money. What about St. John's Wort... what's the correct dosage for cats? Is this a problem I ought to be seeing a vet about? I feel so over my head right now. Any suggestions or help would be most welcomed.
I have read a number of articles on cat behavior/aggression and introducing cats to one another. I don't know that my situation is "unique" except for the fact that so many things are going on all at once.
I was compelled to move in with my boyfriend, Jake, rather suddenly due to various real life issues. I could not part with my two spayed female cats (Angelica, a petite longhaired kitty who tends to be a bit nervous, and Jedi, a Siamese calico mix who is fairly unflappable), both of whom are quite friendly and reasonably well-behaved but used to being indoor/outdoor. My boyfriend was perfectly happy for me to bring them here.
Jake, too, has a cat that he has had since it was a kitten four years ago, a male named Neko. Neko was not socialized with other animals or other humans, and he's never left the apartment. He absolutely adores Jake, and both of them were accustomed to living a life of solitary bachelorhood before I came into the picture a year and a half ago. I was the first girl Jake ever had around much since he got Neko.
I am an animal person and used to gentle kittens and befriend feral cats when I was a kid living on a farm in Indiana... so I thought I had a fairly good handle on cat behavior. I took it slow with Neko. For a long time he was just timid around me... eventually he let me pet him and I thought everything would be roses after that, but seemingly quite suddenly he turned on me and has absolutely loathed me ever since. At the time he was not neutered. Neko became highly aggressive (hissing at me and then striking as soon as my back was turned, leaving pretty nasty scratches on my legs even through jeans) and at that point he also started spraying. So Jake finally got Neko neutered. This stopped the spraying, but did not stop the aggressive behavior.
I tried feeding Neko special food from a pouch to try to bribe him into liking me. He loves the food I got for him so much that he will dig into the garbage to get out the pouch and rip it open to lick it clean. It got to the point that whenever I went to the kitchen, Neko would be right there, rubbing against my legs as if he loved me, expecting me to feed him. But I couldn't give him that expensive food ALL the time. So then he'd get mad and hiss and scratch me because I didn't behave in the way he expected me to, I guess. Poor kitty, I'm sure he was confused.
Incidentally, Neko eats plastic. Like chews it up, swallows it and then barfs it back up if he finds any scraps anywhere... but he did this before I came into the picture. We try not to leave anything lying around, but occasionally he manages to find some. I read this is pica, and a sign of an anxiety problem... I'm sure the current living situation doesn't help that.
When I moved in here a little over a month ago, I pretty much came to accept the occasional scratch as a matter of course. This apartment is small, and Neko and I have a hard time staying out of each other's way. I try to be patient, and usually use a shirt or something to gently herd him out of the way when he's in my path. He walks across my desk sometimes on the way to see Jake (our desks are next to each other) and he will tolerate a bit of petting when that happens. Scratching has become less frequent, but sometimes he will strike very unexpectedly, and always when my back is turned. I have no idea what to do about this.
Unfortunately, the fact that I brought two cats with me has compounded the issue. Unsurprisingly, Neko doesn't like them (and they don't like him much either.) I put them in the bedroom and Neko stays in the other room... leaving the door open sometimes so they could try to get used to seeing each other. They have separate litterboxes and food. Well... my cats have established the bedroom as their territory and they don't venture out hardly at all even after a month. When they do, Neko chases them right back into the bedroom. Neko himself will sometimes go into the bedroom, and when that happens a minor fight will ensue with much hissing and growling and a bit of scratching. Neko has definitely scratched Angelica... on her nose, and on her neck. The scratches don't seem deep but I am worried! What if he gets her eye? I don't blame Neko for this... my cats haven't been particularly nice to him, either, but they're not being aggressive.
But I feel absolutely awful because I have two cats cooped up in a bedroom when they're used to going outside pretty regularly. I can't let them here -- the area is much busier/more urban and the apartment door opens into a hallway, not outside.
My cats love me and they adore Jake. I go into the bedroom often to spend time with them, but most of the time they just sit around in there with nothing to do (but they generally aren't meowing or complaining or anything). We'd all be happier, though, if all the cats felt welcome throughout the apartment. I can't stomach the idea of separating Neko and Jake. He gets so frustrated when Neko scratches me, but he loves his cat and I can tell how much he would regret giving him away. And I feel the same if not more so about my cats... but I am so worried about all of them and their happiness/quality of life... Hopefully in six months or so we will get a bigger place with access to the outdoors... but what do we do in the meantime?
We are poor and would have a very hard time finding money for expensive treatments... but we're open to doing what it takes. My thoughts at present are to fit all the cats with Soft Claws. Last week I put vanilla on them all and it didn't seem to have an effect. Maybe it was too late for that? Some people say Feliway is great, but others seem to report that it's ineffective... I want to know the odds on it helping before I invest that kind of money. What about St. John's Wort... what's the correct dosage for cats? Is this a problem I ought to be seeing a vet about? I feel so over my head right now. Any suggestions or help would be most welcomed.
