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just want an opinion.......

post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 
Do you think it's right to go out to lunch with your immediate supervisor? Some of the gals at work go to lunch with the lead. And, I know for a fact that the lead will talk about the problem people of the group, etc. So, I am wondering what you all think? Sometimes, I dont think its right to go to lunch with the leads/supervisors. What if one of the girls were to tell the wront person that the lead was talking trash on someone, whether it is true or not, and then the person the lead was talking about heard?
Something that I observed today........

Or...... what about being buddies with a supervisor?
post #2 of 15
This kind of ties into my new possible career move, so I'll give you my 2 cents. I don't agree with "hanging out" with your boss or supervisor. My company frowns on it BIGTIME! We are not allowed to have Christmas parties or anything like that with our Supervisor. Get this: If I happened to be a bar and my Supervisor happened to be there, my Supervisor could get fired because of it. Even if we didn't go there together! In that case, the Supervisor is "required" to leave immediately. I think this is extreme and not right, but I can see what the company is trying to do.

As for going to Lunch or something, I don't see too much of a big deal there....as long as work is not discussed during that time. Your boss sounds a bit shady if he/she is discussing those kinds of issues during that time. JMO
post #3 of 15
I know people I work with go to lunch a lot together . . . regardless of who is who's boss. I don't think it would be a problem, but if your lead talks about people you work with, maybe it's not such a good idea . . . .
post #4 of 15
My rule is, if it makes you wonder, "Is it ok or not?", it probably isn't. This sounds like an unhealthy situation. It's not always necessarily bad to go to lunch with the boss, but in most company atmospheres, I'd say it was a big mistake.
post #5 of 15
Thread Starter 
Personally, I would not go to lunch with a supervisor. And, I dont think a super should be hanging outside of work with the person below them. I saw too much of favoritism at my last job where people were buddies with the boss and got away with soooooooo much. It's the same at this job. One of the other leads is practically best friends with the one girl who is on her team, they share a ride together. And, you know she will get a good raise.
It almost makes me want to know if my lead is talking about me, but I could care less what she thinks. I know I do a good job, so thats all that should matter, you;d think?

Thats another thing; why is it the people who work their asses off, and have good work ethics are the ones who get poor raises, and yet the bad workers get the good raises!
post #6 of 15
Isn't that the truth!
Yesterday at work we had a big meeting where we discuss things that we all need to improve on. One thing was recognition for your good actions. I of course spoke up (there are times when I need to just SHUT MY MOUTH!)! I said that it's sad that they people who bust their butts day in and day out, get no credit for what they do. It is the people who do just the bare minumum of their job who happened to do something great are the one who get the pat on the back. Here's an example:
Edna is not people friendly and she just "puts in her time" everyday. When a customer asked where something is we are SUPPOSED to take them to the item...but Edna never does this. A customer asked her where the Tylenol was and she actually showed the customer where it was...What does Management do? They give her Associate of the Month! Why? This is a requirement and something you should do a hundred+ times a day...and since she actually did it this time she gets praised.
My Store Manager listened to my comment, but it went in one ear & out the other. It just isn't fair to the workers who do their job the right way everyday!
post #7 of 15
Shell, I hate that! It irritates me so much and there's mostly nothing you can do about it! The dumb thing is, if you did 'just the bare minimum' instead of working your butt off, someone would notice, STRAIGHT AWAY!!
post #8 of 15
Jeez! That's harsh Shell!

Darrell is best friends with his boss. But Darrell doesn't take advantage of that, and Steve knows it!

I think as long as you're a hard worker and don't use the aquantaince to boost your career, then there's nothing wrong with it. You're just two people who happen to get along outside of work.

Just my opinion.
post #9 of 15
Try being a cabbie!!! I get along with most of the dispatchers where I work, but I don't bury my nose so far up their butt my nose gets brown.

If they ask me to get a coffee I will, but I don't go out of my way to get them one.... most of the dispatcher's don't pay ya back anyway.
post #10 of 15
Well, in some work environments, it's ok. My boss actually brought me lunch last Thursday, and we ate in the office. However, we're the only 2 employees at that location. In a lot of corporate environments, seeing a particular employee or clicque of employees getting friendly with the boss can stir bad feelings, even if done with honest intentions. And sometimes, the intentions are to kiss up and put down other coworkers, which is why companies have bans on fraternizing. It depends on the case in question.
post #11 of 15
I went to lunch quiet often with my immediate supervisor "we called them TL for Team Leader". We got along well enough, but we normally didn't talk about work while we were together, we laughed but it was really kept pretty professional, plus he was very paranoid about sexual harassment at work, so for that reason we kept it very formal.

I don't know why you would want to hang out with someone who is just going to talk badly about other people, what a downer.

Though it would be nice to stay on his good side. I say give it a shot, and see what he/she does, see if he/she's even someone you would LIKE to spend your lunch break with. He/She might be a cool dude, and you might score some points by doing this.

While yes I wont lie, we both had a sexual attraction to eachother (we never wound up hooking up, as I moved away.) but it did help a lot, made work a friendly place, I had something to look forward too, we would talk online after work sometimes, and he even scored me a $1.00 raise. (Which at that time was the most you could get for a raise in one jump.)
post #12 of 15
I see nothing wrong with going to lunch with the supervisor. I see A LOT wrong with the supervisor discussing others on the job in front of the lunch companions, however. That's just flat-out unprofessional.
post #13 of 15
I work for a family owned business. I like my boss very much. His father owned the company before him and he is buying the business from his dad. So my boss went from father to son. His father and I had more of a boss/administrative assistant relationship. The son and I have more of a casual friendship, because we were co-workers before he became the boss. I know he is my boss, but I have been here a lot longer than him. I am telling him what to do most of the time.

He took me out to lunch on Administrative Assistant's day and it was OK. I wish his wife could have gone with us though. I think I would have been more comfortable. Not that it was not proper, but in a small community, you know how it can be. I kept telling people who stopped by the table why we were there.
post #14 of 15
Where I work it's pretty casual. You always see the different department heads and administrative people mingling. Any combination of people you can imagine can and do go have lunch together.

I have had lunch with the boss and I don't speak ill of my co-workers, if for no other reason than it would make me look petty and reflect poorly on me, as a gossip and troublemaker.

It's nice one on one time that allows the boss get to know me better as a person and vice versa. Some people here are tighter with upper management than others. It really comes down to a personality issue and who just 'clicks'.

I personally don't see a problem (where I work) with the different level people mingling outside of the office.
post #15 of 15
I thnk it's OK to go out to lunch with your supervisor, as long as everyone in the group is invited, or at least a portion of the people (example:it's a big office, and the supervisor takes out one specific team).

As for being friends with your supervisor, from my personal experience it almost always causes trouble, although I have mainly been in an academic environment.

My thesis advisor was good friends with one of the other people in the lab. They were the same age, same interests, etc. But, they never really discussed what was going on in the lab. This friendship respected the professional bounds.

My postdoc lab was a whole other story. Our advisor would have parties and hang out drinking with the students all night. If you didn't participate, it really hurt your "standing" in the lab. Now, my boss hangs out with two of the other researchers in the lab. Things get decided without the rest of the lab (4 of us) having any input. It really sucks, especially when they are deciding about things they have no experience in and I do.
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