How many of you subscribe to the law of attraction?

I've been kind of down, missing the old boyfriend that I broke up with, and am really better off without him, he was bad for my self esteem. But I really want to be in a meaningful relationship.
Have any of you practiced this philosophy LOA successfully?

I found that when I stopped looking for Mr. Right and said to heck with it, that's when Mr. Right appeared. Some 31+ years later, he's still Mr. Right.

First of all . It's hard breaking up anyway, but especially this time of year.

I agree, when you stop looking that's when you find him. Actually, DH and I were best friends and dated on and off casually for 10 years before the stars fell into alignment, we opened our eyes and realized we were meant to be together. So, who knows...Mr Right might be right there with you, you're just not ready to see it.

I DO know, the one time I really was looking, I fell ga-ga, head over heels with someone and started a 3 year long drama of on again, off again, friends "with benefits" relationship that almost sent me into therapy. Well, maybe not that bad, but it definately changed my view of myself to a much worse one. From what I've learned from personal experience and from what I've heard from other women, if you're looking you find the worst men.

This time of year, people want to be with someone because that is what all the commercials and songs and everything say. I would take time out, concentrate on yourself, get some good chocolate and a comfy blanket, chill out with your favorite movie, snuggle down with your cats and come Jan you'll feel better. Concentrate on YOU! You deserve it.

Originally Posted by Yosemite

I found that when I stopped looking for Mr. Right and said to heck with it, that's when Mr. Right appeared. Some 31+ years later, he's still Mr. Right.

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Once you are in a place in life where you are completely happy by yourself, that's when you meet the right guy, and everything in your life changes again.

Exes are like a carton of spoiled milk in the fridge. No matter how long you keep it, it's still going to taste spoiled when you bring it out again!

I hope you find what you are looking for.

Originally Posted by SwampWitch

Exes are like a carton of spoiled milk in the fridge. No matter how long you keep it, it's still going to taste spoiled when you bring it out again!

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OMG, I LOVE that analogy, and it's so true!!!

While I appreciate the concept and know that it works for some, I have a totally different viewpoint.

After my ex-husband left me (moved out and said he wanted a divorce), I decided that I could continue to be miserable and sad, or continue my "I hate men" period, I could immerse myself in work - or self-help like books and the gym, OR I could ...

determine what I really wanted in a man and think of who fit that description... and...
go after him!

My Mom said to wait at least a year to avoid the rebound effect.

My Dad said "honey, you are forty_____. You don't have a year." LOL!

Well, I didn't know exactly where he lived, so I cruzed the neighborhood several times until one Saturday morning, I saw his shoulder in the window! I was so nervous that it took me 10 minutes to get out of the car. I didn't know how to find his unit from the inside of the building, so I stood on his front lawn and yelled his name. He was totally shocked, but we had a really nice visit.

I "stalked" him a few more times.

Long story short - we have been together now for almost 7 years and will be married for 3 years in a few months. Neither of us can imagine being with someone else. We are totally in love and soul mates.

Originally Posted by SwampWitch

Once you are in a place in life where you are completely happy by yourself, that's when you meet the right guy, and everything in your life changes again.

Exes are like a carton of spoiled milk in the fridge. No matter how long you keep it, it's still going to taste spoiled when you bring it out again!

I hope you find what you are looking for.

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I had been single/casually dating for over a year. I was ok with being single and had just ended a casual relationship when DH answered the door. A friend of mine had just moved in with him. At first look we both thought that the other would be fun in bed. 7+ years later and we're very happy it turned into more than just a physical thing.

Originally Posted by Rockcat

While I appreciate the concept and know that it works for some, I have a totally different viewpoint.

After my ex-husband left me (moved out and said he wanted a divorce), I decided that I could continue to be miserable and sad, or continue my "I hate men" period, I could immerse myself in work - or self-help like books and the gym, OR I could ...

determine what I really wanted in a man and think of who fit that description... and...
go after him!

My Mom said to wait at least a year to avoid the rebound effect.

My Dad said "honey, you are forty_____. You don't have a year." LOL!

Well, I didn't know exactly where he lived, so I cruzed the neighborhood several times until one Saturday morning, I saw his shoulder in the window! I was so nervous that it took me 10 minutes to get out of the car. I didn't know how to find his unit from the inside of the building, so I stood on his front lawn and yelled his name. He was totally shocked, but we had a really nice visit.

I "stalked" him a few more times.

Long story short - we have been together now for almost 7 years and will be married for 3 years in a few months. Neither of us can imagine being with someone else. We are totally in love and soul mates.

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I hope this is someone you knew! I think knowing exactly what you want in a a man and what you won't except is a great start. I don't believe in settling and this is a good way to avoid that.

Originally Posted by twstychik

I hope this is someone you knew!

I think knowing exactly what you want in a a man and what you won't except is a great start. I don't believe in settling and this is a good way to avoid that.

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LOL! I knew him for about 10 years - always liked him as a person and his philosophies. You're right. Settling never works. It just makes you resent the person you settled for.

I really think it depends on the person. Some can sit around, wait and find love, others have to put themselves out there.

I met Tristan irl 3 days after i was dumped, it was only a 6 month relationship and not that good. We had been chatting on IRC for maybe a year or more and were meeting as friends. But now we're engaged and have been together over 3 years. I've finally met someone who i can be 100% myself with. Wether it's my random weird noises, twisted sense of humour, singing outbursts, funny accents, talking to the animals as we drive past, thinking murderous thoughts of annoying people, he completely gets me because he does the same thing, or it just doesn't phase him.

I really think if i hadn't have met him i would've died from loneliness or topped myself only because i spent my entire life chasing after guys who were never interested.

I completely understand how you feel. If you feel that getting out there will help, then you should try it and see how you go.

Originally Posted by Rockcat

LOL! I knew him for about 10 years - always liked him as a person and his philosophies. You're right. Settling never works. It just makes you resent the person you settled for.

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Wow! That is the "sh*t or get off the pott" philosophy. I tried that with my ex....didn't work. But I'm glad it worked for you. I agree no one should settle. Marriage for me is for life.

ok, dumb question what exactly is the Law of Attraction?

Originally Posted by katiemae1277

ok, dumb question

what exactly is the Law of Attraction?

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Law of attraction is an incarnation of the cosmic consciousness, or all the answers are out there, just ask the question. If you put out love, you will receive love, same true for negativity. Just google it and you will get the complete rundown.

I do believe that you do attract more people when you give off happy or positive vibes... they say women in satisfying relationships attract men!

I do get flirted with more since I began dating Doug -- or maybe I just feel more secure in the harmless stuff....

Well I thought I had found Mr. Right. I waited 3 years of not dating anyone in my life.

Then one day he appeared. No one in this world ever understood me like him. He became my bestfriend quickly. He was supportive in EVERY way. He told me how smart I was, how beatiful I was, how much he cared for me, I made him so happy.

Then ten month into the relationship he dropped a bombshell. I am moving to New York to get my Masters.

Two days later I asked him "If you could have anything you wanted best case senerio of when you move to New York. What would it be?"

He said nothing. Then I asked "Do you love me?" and he didn't reply. His face said it all.

We broke up that night about two months ago. And it still hurts. I really loved him.

So yeah. I feel your pain.

Well, I am not going to get so cosmic about LOA. I think that it means that the first time you meet a person you want to spend the rest of your life with him and he gives you that special physical feeling - I think that we know what I mean - whenever you see him or her.

I met DH when was going back to the U of M after Thanksgiving break. DH was sitting a row or 2 in front of me and I thought he looked cute. We actually stood next to each other at the baggage claim and I noticed his Cornell ring - both of our undergrad university. We just started talking and quickly decided that we had so much in common and so many differences that it made sense that we should be together. There was that physical attraction, too.

We are still married and I still get those - uh - feelings for DH after 26 years.

Yes, stop looking. How many couples have you met that connected at an airport baggage claim, weren't planning on staying in the same state for their careers, and have been married this long? Marriage was not on my mind so that I could get on with my career but he changed my opinion. We moved to the same state where we both had job offers. So, I got my man and my career.

It's just like trying to get pregnant. Stop trying and a happy event will be in the future.

Originally Posted by gailuvscats

Law of attraction is an incarnation of the cosmic consciousness, or all the answers are out there, just ask the question. If you put out love, you will receive love, same true for negativity. Just google it and you will get the complete rundown.

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Heh, I was half expecting you to say "The force of attraction between two objects is proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them."

In seriousness, I don't think that there's some mystic force that returns love for love. I think it's just that we human beings are very good at reading other peoples' emotions, even though we often don't realize it. When we sense that a person is happy, friendly, and confident with themselves we're much more inclined to be interested than if they're angry, depressed, or desperate. That's why so often people say that they get a lot more attention when they have a significant other or they aren't really looking. People notice that self-assurance and find it attractive.