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Christmas Depression

post #1 of 9
Thread Starter 
Does anyone here ever get depressed during the Holidays? I just can't seem to get into the spirit again this year. I have had moments I was in the spirit, like when I got my SS gift, but for the most part, I get really depressed.

These past few years have been extremely hard on us. We lost our house last year due to the fact I wasn't able to keep up on the payments and the homeowner's association dues. With Mike's disability and Social Security being denied, every thing is falling on me. I basically live paycheck to paycheck. Things are a bit better this year and we do have the girls now. Those 2 kitties really bring us joy, but it gets depressing when I can't buy the simple things.

My MIL is upset that we can't go there again this Christmas, but I only get the one day off and my car won't make it that far to travel on the weekend.

I do know that I have a lot to be thankful for. I do have a nice apartment that is cheery and bright. Not like the house that we lost which was falling apart around us. It needed so many repairs that I couldn't afford. I pity the people that ended up buying it, since it probably cost a lot of money to repair it. (It needed a new tub and toilet, bathroom fixtures, electrical work, carpeting and other things.)

Be praying that when we go to court sometime next year, that Mike will be approved for his Disability. When that comes through, things will start looking up for us. Mike wants me to buy a new car with the back pay. They are supposed to be paying us all the back pay when approved and if they do, it will be from Feb 2007.

Sorry this is so long, but I needed to get this off my chest.
post #2 of 9
Honey, Christmas can be hard on us, and it sounds like you have had a lot on your plate recently. Just think you have a day off from work...enjoy it however you want to! The important thing is you have a great apartment, 2 wonderful kitties and Mike. What more could you as for?? (tell MIL to kiss your butt! ).

Hey, in another thread, I said I wanted to crawl under the covers and sleep until Jan 2...wanna join me?

Many prayers and going out for Mike's court date. That would take SO much off your mind right now.

Everyone needs to vent, especially this time of year. That's what we're here for. .
post #3 of 9
The holidays can make problems seem worse sometimes. I have been there!!!!! Good luck with the social security next year. My friend went through it and its a long process. Hang in there! I hope things start turning around for you very soon.
post #4 of 9
I think I can understand how you feel some. I've felt that way around the holidays in the past. For varying reasons. There is a lot of extra pressure on everyone from so many directions during the holidays; it's understandable. I hope you can enjoy your day off! And I hope everything else starts looking up too!
post #5 of 9
I too have had many a Christmas where I was depressed.

Goodluck in the new year and enjoy the day with your kitties and Mike. Spending time with those who make you happy and love are what Christmas is all about.

sending you good for the new year and a giant
post #6 of 9
The holidays can be very depressing when your struggling to just make ends meet, add to that the demands on our time, and the fact that sometimes we are being pulled in a dozen different directions.
It can be pretty over-whelming that's for sure.
Just try and keep in mind the little things that make your life special and have faith that in the end things will turn out the way they should.
Sending lots of feel better viibes out to you.
post #7 of 9
I know it's hard. It's the time of the year when we, esp. the women, put all kinds of unrealistic ideas of holiday perfection upon ourselves--and that's not necessarily our doing (TV, Martha Stewart, commercials, etc.). We expect to be happy now. I have found in life that the less you expect out of an occasion, the better it turns out. Embrace the simple joys of the season--these are mostly joys that exist the rest of the year, but we sometimes forget that...we need to relax, and let it just flow. (It isn't easy for me to say this--I'm one of those Martha Stewart types myself!) Now, the problem with this is that YOU may be able to relax, but then there the others in the family who haven't gotten to that stage yet, and may have expectations for the "perfect" Christmas. I don't know how to advise you on how to "convert" them!

It's funny that I just saw your post. I was just thinking to myself about my miserable Christmases lately. Three Christmases ago, my family basically disowned me on Christmas Eve. I found out that they, even my Mother, had always hated me. I had inklings all my life, but that night it all came to a head. Christmas has been very lonely here since then--it's just DH and I (we are childless, and likely to remain so). It PAINS me to think that I have a family as close as 4 miles down the road, but yet I DON'T have a family. Well, just before I read your post, I thought to myself, "You need to get past this. The fact remains that you don't have a family. Sure, it hurts. But you have to decide what's important to you in life, and celebrate that especially at Christmas in lieu of having your family around." I'm not sure yet what that thing will be (helping the homeless? Celebrating with good friends, who truly love me? Going to some holiday event on Christmas Day, in lieu of the non-existent family dinner?), but I don't want to waste another Christmas Day crying over my dumb family, who will never like me anyway. It won't be easy, and I don't expect to entirely forget my sadness, but I must turn it into something positive--because if I don't,
I will learn to hate what can be the most beautiful time of year, and I don't want to turn into that sort of person. There ARE so many good and positive things out there. You just have to find them...and celebrate them--even if it's "only" a good meal with loved ones, or doing a small kindness to someone in need. Christmas is not about the cool new toy that everyone's raving about, or a luxury car with a big bow stuck on it. It's about love, kindness, sharing, counting your blessings, and the love of God. You DO have these things in your life, even though there are times when it doesn't seem so.

I wish you all the best, and also A Merry Christmas, and a Happy, Healthy New Year.
post #8 of 9
Yes I admit I get depressed every year around the holidays. My mom died many years ago on Christmas Eve and remembering that I get even more depressed. My cat died this year on Nov. 22nd so that is making me very unhappy this year. I have heard that most suicides are done around the holiday season so you are not alone in your feelings.
post #9 of 9
This holiday time has been more depressing than the last holidays. This Thanksgiving, my MIL's cat died, so from now on, Thanksgiving Day is going to be bittersweet. Her cat was 16 years old, and something even more special about her was that she was picked out from a farm by my DH when he was around 15 YO.

I think what makes it even harder this Christmas is just how much tighter everyone's wallets are. Finances can be very stressful. Our kitties are like an escape for us, because when they are on my lap just wanting some attention, I don't have to think of anything else besides their angelic faces.

OP, you definitely have a lot on your chest, and I hope things will fall into place for you and Mike. I guess we just have to believe. Believe that everything will work out. Taking it one day at a time and just believing certainly helps getting me through.

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