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I am officially a cat killer!

post #1 of 28
Thread Starter 
As I was driving home on the highway there is one part where it splits from one highway to another and as I was turning on the other, this cat runs right in front of me as I'm going 60 mph and sees my headlights and freezes! I have guardrails on both sides and I tried to brake, but I wasn't fast enough, I have traffic behind me and I can't swerve without causing an accident myself.

Needless to say, the only thing I could do was keep driving and I ran the poor cat over right down the middle and broke its back in the process. I could see it twisting in my rear view mirror, but at that speed there was no way I could stop and turn around. I felt horrible and it freaked me out! I could feel it as I ran it over. I can't get that picture out of my mind. I know I couldn't do anything to avoid it, but it doesn't make me feel any better. I really shouldn't have any cats. A friend of mine drove home after me and saw it. It was dead, but I hope it didn't suffer long. I really hate myself right now.
post #2 of 28
Sweetie, there was nothing you could have without making a bad situation worse. Please be gentle with yourself and forgive yourself.
post #3 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by katachtig View Post
Sweetie, there was nothing you could have without making a bad situation worse. Please be gentle with yourself and forgive yourself.
post #4 of 28
As much as I freaked reading what happened, jaw dropped, teared up, You are not to blame! As you explained, there could have been a much more tragic result.......I also think you are a good person looking to the right place to talk to someone who understands how you feel about this. Just know that it was out of your hands........
post #5 of 28
Oh Honey...I'm so sorry you had to go throught that. Many, many years ago I was taking my Dad for a ride in my car to hear the *funny* noise it was making. An orange tabby ran in front of me, I hit the brakes and thought it would make it across. But it stopped looked right at me and then ran again and I hit it. I freaked out! My Dad just said calmly "keep driving", he was looking out the back window and knew it didn't make it and there was a line of traffic behind me and nowhere to pull over. My heart goes out to you, there was nothing you could do to prevent that. It's owners should have had it's kitty inside, where they belong and are safe!
post #6 of 28
Oh hun I'm sorry but don't beat yourself up. These things happen, we have no control over anything.
post #7 of 28
Oh no, that is terrible but there wasn't anything else you could do.

If if makes you feel any better I think most, if not all of us, have been there. I killed someone's Beagle who just loved chasing cars on the highway. I drove by every day thinking, "that dog is going to get killed!" Then, one day, I kill it..... I went to tell the owners.....of course, I should have known they woudn't be crushed since they didn't care that it chased cars: "Oh we knew it would happen one of these days"
post #8 of 28
I'm sorry you had to experience that, but you made the right choice. If the cat was someone's pet, it was their mistake, letting the cat outside where it could be hit by a car, that was at fault, nothing you did.

It happens to me occasionally, and I always feel bad, too.
post #9 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by katachtig View Post
Sweetie, there was nothing you could have without making a bad situation worse. Please be gentle with yourself and forgive yourself.


I've had it happen to me, too. Thankfully, it was only once - but that was bad enough. I felt so bad about it for a loooong time.

Unfortunately, those things can & do happen. Please don't be too hard on yourself. It was an accident: you didn't mean to do it.
post #10 of 28
I've never hit a cat or dog, but I did hit a raccoon a couple years ago. It was a busy road at night and I didn't see it until it was within the limits of my headlights. I think someone else had hit it first because just as it came into view, I could see it sit up and look at me. I'm thinking whoever hit him first must have broken his back legs or something. I was going 40-45 miles per hour and so by the time I saw him there was no way I could stop. I just heard a *thud* as I hit him. My fiance was in the car with me and I just screamed. We were meeting some friends at a video store to pick out a movie for the night and when we got there, I couldn't go in. I just sat in the car and cried. Even though it was "just" a raccoon, I think it was hard because when i was a kid, my family rescued a baby raccoon that was abandoned outside our house. We had it for about a week before finding an animal rehab place that could take it in.

I guess I can take some comfort in that I probably put the poor thing out of his misery.
post #11 of 28
This summer, I was doing field work in the mountains. I was driving an SUV with two other students, and my professor drove on ahead. I couldn't keep up because the road was so curvy. At some point, I saw a big dead animal in the road. I slowed down to try to figure out what it was and it moved! "It" was actually 3 kittens.

I hit the brakes hard. All I could think was, "Someone left kittens in the road!" I tried so hard to stop, but I still managed to hit something. I thought I had hit a kitten and cried and cried. I pulled over and looked for the other kittens, but they had run off. The kitten I hit was one that had already been hit and the other two had been inspecting it. It turns out, it was my professor who had hit the cat. I felt disappointed, angry, sad...

Of course you deserve to have cats. You love your cats, and what happened was an accident. While running over the cat is by no means a desirable outcome, it could have been worse. I saw on TV once, about a lady who was driving with her brothers and she swerved to avoid hitting a couple of ducks crossing the road. This caused her to crash, and her brothers didn't survive.

I'm probably not helping any. But I hope you aren't so hard on yourself, you're not a bad person!
post #12 of 28
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by cheylink View Post
As much as I freaked reading what happened, jaw dropped, teared up, You are not to blame! As you explained, there could have been a much more tragic result.......I also think you are a good person looking to the right place to talk to someone who understands how you feel about this. Just know that it was out of your hands........
The friend who saw it said there was no way I could have avoided it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by spudsmom View Post
It's owners should have had it's kitty inside, where they belong and are safe!
That's what my friend said, but I still feel bad because it is a living thing.


Quote:
Originally Posted by EnzoLeya View Post
Oh no, that is terrible but there wasn't anything else you could do.

I know that, but it still bothers me.

If if makes you feel any better I think most, if not all of us, have been there. I killed someone's Beagle who just loved chasing cars on the highway. I drove by every day thinking, "that dog is going to get killed!" Then, one day, I kill it..... I went to tell the owners.....of course, I should have known they woudn't be crushed since they didn't care that it chased cars: "Oh we knew it would happen one of these days"
That is just wrong. I can't believe people are so careless and emotionless.
post #13 of 28
There was nothing you could do to avoid it, so dont be too hard on yourself. I've only ever hit birds (two), but there is a dog on our street that always is running in front of cars. The mail truck no longer tries to go slow and avoid it - it usually stays just far enough away from the tires - but I worry one day I'll be the one to hit it. (I bet the owners are as emotionless as the ones EnzoLeya posted about, too).

You definitely deserve your cats! If you didn't feel bad about hitting the cat, then maybe that would be different, and horrible. Hitting someones pet would be upsetting to anyone with a heart.
post #14 of 28
I had something similar happen to me many years ago... driving to work on the FREEWAY in the middle of the night. I couldn't stop or I would have been late to work and in big trouble. When I got to work, I called police dispatch and told them and asked them to notify animal control. I was sick to my stomach for the rest of the day.
post #15 of 28
I'm so, so sorry this happened. No matter how we try to avoid them, accidents still happen. Please try to cut yourself some slack, there was nothing you could do it avoid it.

I know how you are feeling... I ran over a squirrel last summer, and saw the same thing in my rearview mirror and I couldn't stop either.
post #16 of 28
I'm so sorry that happened... but as everyone agrees, it wasn't your fault. It's ignorant people who let their animals run loose who cause these tragedies. Please forgive yourself, hon.
post #17 of 28
Oh Sabrina I would feel horrible too but you couldn't help it. My dad always says if it's bigger than a sheep try to avoid but anything smaller you can't compromise your safety to avoid hitting. I know I hit a rabbit this past summer and I felt terrible for weeks. I mean what did that little thing ever do to me. But then thinking about the situation I couldn't avoid it, there was oncoming traffic and someone right behind me if I had swerved or slammed on the breaks something even worse would have happened. I know your a cat lover and if you hit it and could take it to the vet you would but when that much trauma happens to an animal there is nothing you can do.

When I was about 12 years old our Orange and White DLH "Sam" got trapped in the garage door. When mom took us to school that morning we couldn't find the cat (he was indoor outdoor) so we left and hit the remote on the garage door when we were pulling out. We didn't know that Sam was on top of the door and that instead of jumping off and into the garage he would try to squeeze though the space at the top of the door. My dad came home 6 hours later and Sam was still alive. All of his ribs and spine had been crushed. There was nothing we could do. The vet came to the house and put him down. My mom felt horrible for weeks after that she kept blaming herself or not looking and not making sure he wasn't in the garage. and I said to mom. Even if you had looked back to see that he was stuck in the garage door, there was nothing you could have done. He still would have had to been put to sleep. It was a freak accident. There is no fixing it and noway to go back in time to make it happen differently.

*hugs* there is nothing you could have done I know it may sound harsh but these things happen even if we don't like it.
post #18 of 28
Oh god sweetie, i am so sorry =( I can't imagine how you must be feeling. It was an unfortunate thing, it does not mean you shouldn't have cats. We all know you love your furbabies and like you said it was unavoidable.

I hope the poor thing R.I.Ps.
post #19 of 28
Thread Starter 
Thanks everyone for your kind words. I know it happens, but the sound it made when I ran it over still rings in my head. I just hope it never happens again.
post #20 of 28
I am sending prayers and vibes that the awful memory soon goes away
As the others have already said, it was an accident. The kitty made a horrible mistake but he isn't suffering anymore. I just finished reading a book called "Life is So Good" by George Dawson, an African American who learned to read at 98yo, and co-wrote his authobiography at 101 years!! Anyway, while a young boy, he and his father watched the lynching of a dear family friend - it disturbed him greatly, until his father said that it was just the friend's "time", and that friend's suffering was over and he was in a better place. sometimes, that's the best logic we can use. My 18yo nephew was murdered in 1992 and my brother was killed by a drunk driver in 1993 and I would have gone crazy if not for that same philosophy. It doesn't take away or minimize the loss, but it gives one's heart the beginning of healing.
I know that there are those who would think that I shouldn't compare losing my human family members to the loss of some unknown cat, but I remember that Jesus said that God cares even when a sparrow falls, so I know that God cares for that cat, too Play happily over RB, little kitty- all of us here at TCS will tell our RB kitties to welcome you to their kitty club
post #21 of 28
I´m so sorry about it...
post #22 of 28
I know I would be feeling the same way as you are. It's a feeling no one can talk you down from. I still remember my first car "accident" and that was a skunk, over 12 years ago! I'm sorry.
And I just had a thought...better to be run over and killed quickly than to freeze or starve or be killed some other horrible way outside where she didn't belong in the first place. All things happen for a reason, maybe that thought of you spared her suffering will ease it...if only a little.
post #23 of 28
That is sad. I feel your pain. I once hit a deer. It was in Wisconsin. It was night time. I saw a small group of deer on the road and braked hard . I hit a doe. I remember the sight of her head rolling up and smashing on the hood of the car and then rolling off to the side. I pulled over and cried.

It could of been worse. I was OK, but I was frightend and shocked.

I am sure you know it was not your falt, but knowing that does not make you feel any better. Huggs.
post #24 of 28
Oh honey, I feel your pain too. Years ago, I was driving down a road near home and there was a cat in the middle of my lane. I couldn't swerve to avoid it, all I could do is make sure the cat was in the centre of the car so I could drive over it without squishing it. I pulled over, and it was alive, but injured, and hissing and growling at me, but couldn't move. I didn't know what to do, and was standing in the middle of the road trying to flag down someone to help me, but everyone kept just going around me.

A dog walked came by, and helped me pick the cat up in her jacket, and we discovered a tag, so I called the owners, who were right nearby and so distraught. She was a gorgeous Persian, and I don't know if she made it.

Every time I drove past that spot for weeks I would tear up, so I avoided it when I could. For ever more though, every time I drove past that spot I thought of the kitty. I was so upset thinking about how freaked out this kitty was, and what it must have been like for her to see my car coming, then have it pass right over her head without her being able to do anything.

This will haunt you for a long time unfortunately, and you will never forget it, but I think there's so many cats and dogs outside that it happens to everyone at least once.
post #25 of 28
First of all, you are NOT A CAT KILLER!! Get that in your head first. You had no control over the situation. If you had slammed on your breaks, with no care for the cars behind you to go you could have caused human deaths. You did what you had to do. A "cat killer" is someone that goes out trying to kill cats. You love your cats and we all know that (and your kitties DEFINITELY know that!) and they are who is important right now.

I wish I could take the sound out of your head, but the only thing that will do that is your own mind once you forgive yourself.
post #26 of 28
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by calico2222 View Post
First of all, you are NOT A CAT KILLER!! Get that in your head first. You had no control over the situation. If you had slammed on your breaks, with no care for the cars behind you to go you could have caused human deaths. You did what you had to do. A "cat killer" is someone that goes out trying to kill cats. You love your cats and we all know that (and your kitties DEFINITELY know that!) and they are who is important right now.

I wish I could take the sound out of your head, but the only thing that will do that is your own mind once you forgive yourself.
I know, but it made me feel worse because it almost looked like a snow bengal. I am going to get to see my aunt's bengals tonight so it makes me feel guilty.
post #27 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by Duchess15 View Post
I know, but it made me feel worse because it almost looked like a snow bengal. I am going to get to see my aunt's bengals tonight so it makes me feel guilty.
you shouldn't feel guilty - it'll keep you from enjoying your visit!
are you going to choose one tonight?
post #28 of 28
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by laureen227 View Post
you shouldn't feel guilty - it'll keep you from enjoying your visit!
are you going to choose one tonight?
No, just going to meet them. The litter that I was to pick from didn't survive. I'll have to wait until next month or for the next cycle. It would have been a perfect christmas gift, but just wasn't meant to be.
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