HELP!! My Persian Wants To Kill My Tabby!!!!

jan reseigh

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I saved a male blue persian six and a half months ago from straydom. My husband and I brought him home to our 15 yr. old female gray tabby. Well, after all this time - he still wants to kill her. She was always an only pet, and was never very fond of other animals that I tried over the years, to introduce her to. And now, even she has come around, and wants to be friends - but he is just not having any of it. He stalks her, he terrorizes her, and they've gotten into two fights. She wants to play with him, but he just wants to attack her. We've tried all kinds of things already...punishing him, locking him in his room, water (which I am against, but had no choice) - and even that doesn't faze him, cause his coat is so thick. I love them both very much, but I can't trust them together. Let alone, leave them alone together when we go out.
She is very tiny and delicate, and he is muscular and huge. And he uses his size to intimidate her. He just towers over her like a giant. And he scares her very much. She is healthy, and eating - and she is finally starting to act like her old self again, although not totally. And she is constantly looking over her shoulder. Hard to get into playing when you are always thinking someone is creeping up behind you....
I am not too familiar with persians - I am still learning. I know that their behavior is different from other cats. Is this typical of persians? I know that he is fighting over me, with her. I try to be fair to both of them - affectionatewise - when they are in the same room together. But I am finally at my wits end. I thought that he would of come around by now, but it is still the same. He is very jealous of her, and her being with me. Can anyone help? Has this happened to anyone of you? What can I do? I will not get rid of him (we went thru hell to get him), but I don't want her to be unhappy either. I love them both very much, and I wish that it could work. They would have so much fun together, if he would just let it happen. HELP!!!! This is breaking my heart!!!

 

lotsocats

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I would immediately separate the two cats. Then follow the introduction process described below. This was written for someone introducing a new cat to her household, but the process will be the same. Also, I would put one or more Comfort Zone diffusers in the house to help calm the cats.

Steps introduce a new cat:

First, put the new kitty in her own room. She will need to stay there for a couple of weeks, so make sure it is comfortable for her with litter box, water, and food. This will allow your old cats to get used to the sounds and smells of a new cat without having their territory invaded.

After a couple of days, start trading scents between the cats. Rub the new cat (especially around the cheeks) with a slightly damp towel and then go rub the old cats with the same towel (and vice versa. This way they will associate the scent of the new cat with good things (being rubbed and getting attention). Do this several times daily.

After one week, lock up your old cats and let the new cat out for the night or for a few hours. Do not yet allow the new and old cats to be together. Do this for one week.

By the end of week two, your old cats are going to be really curious about what is going on with the cat behind the door. You can try bringing the new cat out with the old cats for brief visits. As soon as the new cat comes out, give them all some tuna or some other really yummy treat. This way they associate great things with the other cat. Put the new cat back in her room after a brief period of time. Make sure you keep any aggression from occurring (GENTLY toss a pillow at the aggressor).

Gradually increase the amount of time the cats are together. I recommend keeping new kitty in her room over night for at least a third week. When the cats are out together, make sure you give
lots of attention to the old cats so they know that they are the top kitties.

Expect lots of hissing and perhaps a swat here and there. But...this should keep any real aggression from occurring. The hissing will stop once they establish their hierarchy and get used to each other.

Most importantly....have lots of patience and take things sloooooowly!
 

dragonlady

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By the way, I raise Persians and this is not normal behavior. Has he been fixed? I would have him checked out at the vet. They could be trying to establish who is the top cat. She may be willing to accept the lower rank, but, if you greet her first... This is stealing his thunder. Best of luck with the kitties.
If you can please send photos!
 
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jan reseigh

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Thanks everyone once again. Yes, Shadow is fixed. He was all taken care of right after we found him. Trust me, we made sure he was well enough to be with our other cat before we put them together. It's weird though, he knows that she is the "top" cat here. We made sure to establish this right away. But it seems that he wants to be the boss of the house, and thinks that she should be the lower cat. This is unacceptable to us. Boogie is the boss - no doubt. He's the only one who doesn't seem able to accept this. I don't know why he is doing this. Like I said before, I think that he is fighting for me. And he is VERY jealous of her. And believe me he gets PLENTY of attention - he is spoiled. But still, it makes me wonder after all this time (6&1/2 months now), he still won't get along with her. She's trying, but he refuses. Maybe he's so territorial cause he was a stray before? I don't know. Believe me, we don't let him hurt her, or let him get away with his terrorism. But he always keeps trying - and we always have to stop him. They are fine when they are in the same room together, they even sleep in the same room sometimes together. But as soon as she gets up to walk, he runs and starts his stalking. What could the vet do? Do you think that there is something psychologically wrong with him to still be exhibiting this behavior after all this time? Do persians get along well with other breeds, and I just have a crazy cat? He's adorable and sweet and nice, but as soon as she moves, it's like he's hunting or something. It seems like he just wants to be an "only pet". And won't accept any attention she gets.
Thanks for the input. It helps. Let me know what you think Dragonlady - it's much appreciated. What are your persians like? Do they get along with other breeds of cats? I guess this is pretty uncommon huh? Maybe it has to do with him being a stray? It seems like he was abused a little too when we found him...
 
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jan reseigh

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I wish I could send photos but I don't have a scanner right now. But as soon as I get one - I will.

 

dragonlady

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When he attacks her is there hissing, screaming, and fur flying??? My kitties stalk each other all the time. It is more like kitty tag than anything else. We do have a dsh female spay and she is top cat! They are always getting into spats once and a while but never anything serious. One kitty will stalk the other and then they tear through the house in hot persuit. It is really comical as all of a sudden they both stop and walk away like nothing happened. Have you tried to seperate them and start the introduction over? Did you find the Feliway and see if it helped? Keep us posted!
 
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