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skittish kitty

post #1 of 3
Thread Starter 
I have two cats. The older cat, Spot, has been with me since 2002 and she is the light of my life. Late August circumstances conspired to bring a second cat into the household. Cat #2, Lilah, is a black kitten who was captured as a stray by friends when she was two months old and they fostered until I adopted her.
I've been nothing but quiet, gentle and I've only raised my voice once since she's joined our family but she's always wary around me. The few times I've been able to hold her, pet her, give her treats and speak in soft tones about how she's a good kitty always involved picking her up while she's napping or she happened to follow Spot into the bathroom while I'm in there and I closed the door.
Spot and Lilah get along famously, they have no issues spooning together in bed, they play together and appear to be quite happy with the arrangement. What more can I do to bring her out of her shell and let her know the big human only loves her?
post #2 of 3
Don't try to pick her up. Look for opportunities to gently pet the kitty when it's mellow on a chair.

Get down on the floor and entice the kitty to come play with a toy and/or cat treats. Just let it walk around you first.

Somebody here offered some advice that has worked wonders with my feral kitty, Miss Scaredy Cat. Instead of reaching to pet the cat, I always extend a partially closed hand with curled fingers and the index finger extended just a bit further, but still curled. I wait for the kitty to sniff my index finger, thus giving me the "all clear" for petting.

Our little routine is that kitty hops up on a stool next to my desk for petting. I have used the curled finger to entice her onto my lap.

She's still skittish in other parts of the house.

My wife has yet to touch the kitty after three months. I can't get her to lie on the floor and have the patience to lure the kitty with a fishing pole toy. The "towering human" approach doesn't work.
post #3 of 3
Some kitties are just more "twitchy" than others You have to let her come to you . I know it's really hard to leave them alone. I'm sure she will warm up to you after a few more months. The fact that she gets along with your other cat is great Welcome to TCS!
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