Vibes for our bipolar son

I know that I have posted about Ben, our bipolar son, before. But yesterday was just awful.

Ben's teacher, Dana, called me yesterday and told me that Ben was suspended for today because he picked up a chair and tried to hit her with it. Can all of you who are parents even imagine that the beautiful boy that you brought into this world would pick up a chair to try to hit his teacher?

Ben started hitting himself and biting himself and saying that he wanted to kill himself at school. If he keeps saying that he wants to kill himself we have to commit him to the children's psych ward - 72 hours minimum - where he has been 3 times before. Luckily, it is a wonderful facility.

I also just realized that Ben may need us to take care of him for the rest of our lives which I will do gladly but who is going to take care of him when we can no longer do so?

I am very depressed and I am out of ice cream.

I don't have any advice, but I'm sure that you're a wonderful parent and you'll figure this out.

You are an example of the amazing strength of the human spirit. Sending lots of vibes for your family and your son.

Oh, Rosemary, I am so sorry for you and Ben.. and your entire family. I know you will figure it out. Til then, here are some loving vibes:

I'm so sorry. I do know just what you are going through. My oldest son has Schizoaffective disorder.Bipolar with some schizophrenia. It has been a long hard journey with him. We have good days and then we have the bad days .. He's now 22 married with a 15 month old daughter.They live with us.Hes not able to work and we provide for him wife and granddaughter.
I too see us as always having to take care of him. Meds help but they aren't the cure all.
It breaks my heart to think of what he could of done with his life if he did not have this horrid disease. Hang in there and love him its all you can do..

Oh, I'm so sorry. Please try not to think too far into the future -- it's so hard just being a kid in the first place, it's no wonder he's having some trouble coping with this disorder on top of that. I would imagine it will ease up as he gets older. And of course there are bound to be better treatments in years to come. There's every reason to trust and believe that someday, Ben will be just as happy and healthy as you are now.

But for the moment, I know it's agony to see your little boy going through this, and I'm so sorry for that. You've shared with us some of the wonderful things he's capable of, though -- he's a wonderful boy, and with your love and support, he can overcome this and have a good life. Sending waves of peace and strength to your family, sweetie...

Thanks, everyone. I am going to play name that tune now because it makes me happy.

Originally Posted by butzie

Thanks, everyone. I am going to play name that tune now because it makes me happy.

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Good, you deserve to be happy! As does Ben, and you being happy will make it easier for him to be happy.

I'd come over and bring ice cream if I wasn't stuck at work!

Hang in there, we're always here to listen.

and to your entire family!

Many Many to you! You are amazinging strong, and a great parent.

Is there a councillor your son can see once a week or anything! so he has a constant form of support other then his family.

Maybe his school can arrange this (sorry if this has been mentioned i didnt manage to read the other posts)

He could also have a traffic light system

When he is around people do the following let him have 3 cards

Green- he is focused and wants to join in
Yellow- he does want to be included but would rather work alone
Red- he needs to be left to do his work and thats it , he will talk when he wants too.

Also there are many 24hours lines to talk to guidance people have this avaliable for him!

Hope that helps

Well done too you
Jess x

oh, Rosemary, I'm so sorry you and Ben have been having a bad time lately many vibes for you both to be strong

Originally Posted by junior_j



Is there a councillor your son can see once a week or anything! so he has a constant form of support other then his family.

Maybe his school can arrange this (sorry if this has been mentioned i didnt manage to read the other posts)

He could also have a traffic light system

When he is around people do the following let him have 3 cards

Green- he is focused and wants to join in
Yellow- he does want to be included but would rather work alone
Red- he needs to be left to do his work and thats it , he will talk when he wants too.

Also there are many 24hours lines to talk to guidance people have this avaliable for him!

Hope that helps

Well done too you
Jess x

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Jess,

Thank you so much for your thoughts. Ben is in a special school, a public school, for kids with behavioral problems. It's goal is to use behavioral modifications and positive reinforcements, just like your lights. They didn't work yesterday, but, like you said, we hope that they will work in the long run.

Rosemary

I am very sorry to hear about your son. I have three of them (16,12,6) and my wife and I can only imagine the pain you suffer.

I was diagnosed with Bipolar II earlier this year. His behavior, as described above, does not sound like Bipolar. I obviously don't know the the whole story nor am I a doctor, but throwing chairs and self destructive behavior as well as proclaiming he wants to kill himself does not fall into the Bipolar category -- as least as far as I am aware.

I would say it's time for another visit to a specialist. There are non-habit forming medications that could really help your son to be and feel more normal. Just a thought.

Here's some ice cream for you

He is doing what Terry does from his bi polar.
Montee that idiot bf that my sister dumped asked the same.
He jumped off a roof because my sister would not take him back and broke bones in his back.
He is bi polar also.
He is the one I told you about.
I hope something will help Ben.

For Traveler: Bipolar in children and adults manifest in different ways. Among adults it can manifest in different ways also. It can be difficult to navigate amongst as you know.

My sister had her first bipolar break around the age of 10. Its not easy. But knowledge is the only way to arm yourself. Learn all you can, get support, and most important make sure Ben has plenty of support. You will make it through this.

It doesn't end though, but don't think too much about the future. All we really have is this moment right? My sister is 34, I am 29 and we live together. She hasn't worked in over a year. I am supporting us both while she tries and get disability. Yup, it's not easy. But not all days are bad and I love her dearly so...

Take care of yourself.

Originally Posted by fifi1puss

For Traveler: Bipolar in children and adults manifest in different ways. Among adults it can manifest in different ways also. It can be difficult to navigate amongst as you know.

My sister had her first bipolar break around the age of 10. Its not easy. But knowledge is the only way to arm yourself. Learn all you can, get support, and most important make sure Ben has plenty of support. You will make it through this.

It doesn't end though, but don't think too much about the future. All we really have is this moment right? My sister is 34, I am 29 and we live together. She hasn't worked in over a year. I am supporting us both while she tries and get disability. Yup, it's not easy. But not all days are bad and I love her dearly so...

Take care of yourself.

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Thanks. Bipolar is different in kids. They cycle all the time, sometimes hourly, whereas adults often cycle for months. For those who don't know, that is cycling between the manic and the depressive states.

Ben has gone to psychologists since he was about 5 because there was always something different about him. We have always been proactive about his mental health and have made sure that he sees the correct professionals.

He has had many diagnoses. He has ADHD. At one time a psychologist thought that he might have Asperger's (he doesn't). He does have a mild form of Tourette's as well. Ticks and bad language.

Our beautiful son is so intelligent. He taught himself to read when he was 5. He is artistic and funny. But he is in a manic stage right now. DH is home with me today and Ben is having a major meltdown as we speak and we really may have to hospitalize him.

for you and calming for Ben.

should to be really stressant my friend....
I,m really so sorry my friend...

.... for Ben...