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My Sister is having alot of problems with her ex bf and I told her to call the cops

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 
She dumped him a about three months ago and he will not stop bothering her.
Yesterday she got a terrible email from a fake name on yahoo.
We know it was him and part of the email addy was had dead in it and 666.
I am afraid he will hurt her.
He once jumped on her car to block her from leaving and Jasper is missing.
He used to threaten to hurt him if my sister did not stay with him.
He says he ran away but I do not trust him.
He is bi polar and is crazy.
I have seen him act crazy before.
We told her to get a restraining order.
He even posted pics of her with no shirt on that were private pics.
She got them removed from myspace and you tube.
She will never take him back.
What should she do.
He even calls from other numbers so she will answer the phone.
I can not post the email it was not nice.
post #2 of 17
I would definitely get a restraining order and let the authorities know what is going on. I would also get her to change her number so he can no longer call and harass her.

that he leaves her alone or gets taken care of by the police.
post #3 of 17
I would get her to call the police Things may get worse if not

for her

Who's Jasper?
post #4 of 17
Thread Starter 
I told her to get a restraining order and call the cops.
I also told her not to let him know where I live.
post #5 of 17
Changing her number is a good idea. It certainly sounds like something the police should be involved in
post #6 of 17
Thread Starter 
She has a new number on the landline and he still got it somehow.
post #7 of 17
Tell her this. She needs to file a formal police report. They will sit down with her and go over her options. But at least this way there will be written documentation on him. She needs to print out the e-mail and take that with her to the station. The cop will most likely ask her if she would like to put a court order restraining order on him which in this situation would be best. If you live close enough to her you might want to go with her to the police station for moral and emotional support.

I hope this helps. That your sister will get through this.
post #8 of 17
Is her landline number unlisted? So they still have connected friends?

I'd switch to cell phone only and make a policy that if she doesn't know the number she doesn't answer.
post #9 of 17
Thread Starter 
They are both unlisted numbers.
It mostly happens on teh cell.
I was shopping for my ss when she got one of the phone calls and it was a blocked number.
I said do not answer but the guy she might start dating calls from a blocked number.
She amswered and it was him talking nasty.
She hung up on him.
Me and my husband can go to the police station with her if she wants.
We live about 25 minutes from her.
post #10 of 17
The only advice I can think of was already given, what a terrible man.

I am so sorry she has to go through this, poor terrorized woman....

Your family will certainly be in my prayers...
post #11 of 17
tell her to get some mace or pepper spray, or in some states you can now buy a taser gunremember the cops wont really help unitl he breaks the law , and often by then its 2 late to do anything
post #12 of 17
It would be nice if she could get a body guard or a tough friend to hang around.. I knew someone with a similar problem and she changed her number and got a restraining order and when that didn't work she ended up moving. Well the guy was such a stalker that he found where she moved to very quickly. But then she got a new boyfriend who became like a bodyguard for her... After a while things calmed down when he realized that there was no way she was coming back.

I don't know if that helps.. I certainly wish her luck
post #13 of 17
This is a very serious situation and needs to be taken that way. California has Stalking Laws, but your Sis has to go to the police in order for them to do anything. What he is doing is stalking her. You need to let her know, that she can be protected and the police can get him off the streets, but she has to go to them.

Here is some info to read on California Stalking Law
post #14 of 17
He sounds like my sister's ex husband and he was crazy enough to burn his own mom's house down. I would tell her to get a restraining order and it wouldn't hurt for her to take some self defense classes because restraining orders are good but it does take a minute for the cops to get to your house sometimes. Like where I live it takes much longer than that and so you have to protect yourself.
post #15 of 17
She MUST go to the ploice. If she does not want to, sit her down at the computer and surf some domestic abuse sites, she must act on this, her life could be in danger. Classic abuse patterns are to harm a persons pets, that Jasper is missing is a bad, bad sign. You say that she answers her blocked calls to see if it is a friend she likes, can she set up her phone to give him his own ringtone so she knows its OK to pick up? Can he call her from another number? Why does she not call him instead? SHe must break off ALL contact with the ex, and if that means maybe missing a call now and then, so be it. This is NOT a game. I do not know your friend, but some people thrive on crisis, if she is like this it is of the utmost importance that you do your best to let her know that it is not acceptable to you as her friend.
Does she have any friends he does not know about that live in her area? They could be her safe house, or you could call a crisis center for her to see if there are any safe houses set up in her area, Im sure they would want to see her in person and do a check on her though before giving out that info.
Please, get her to the police station ASAP, even though they might not be able to do much besides arestraining order, it is documentation, and they can bust him even if he does not harm her if her breaks it in any way.
Good luck to her, and to you as her friend.
post #16 of 17
Who is Jasper?

post #17 of 17
Originally Posted by lauracatlover View Post
Who is Jasper?

I would assume her cat or dog, I would guess cat, easy for an outdoor kitty to go missing.
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