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Getting married Saturday and I am sooo sad right now!! (long)

post #1 of 11
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This is supposed to be the happiest day of my life and I am just a bunch of freakin' nerves just hoping I don't forget anything and everything goes right.

Well, if that isn't enough, I did talk to my aunt tonight. She is coming in from out of town and I wanted to know if they could snag the cake for us. That conversation turned into 45 minutes. She pretty much is being like a mother would with a kid's wedding. My own mother really just kind of let me do what I want and didn't give me guidance so in a lot of ways I do appreciate what my aunt is doing (And she is paying for the reception as a gift!). She wanted to know the order of things, people's names, is there a blessing, is there snacks before dinner, etc and so on. *sigh*

She then asked me if my grandma was coming (my mother's mom). I told her she wasn't. My grandma is 81 years old and physically can have a hard time getting around and she would be coming 2.5 hours with my uncle. I understand that when you get older like that, sometimes you just aren't comfortable being away too far from home, etc. Plus, I don't think she feels as well as we think, etc. So, my aunt has to add on that she thinks that is self-fish and la de da of her. I love my aunt to death (step-aunt), but this is my GRANDMA and I am the only GRANDCHILD and I would die for my grandma. I was TERRIBLY offended by what she said, but I didn't say anything to her really...just that I didn't think she felt very well lately. I could sit here and CRY over this!!

Am I wrong? I mean, should I just blow it off to the wind?? I feel so bad that she could say such a thing about someone that is so important to me!
post #2 of 11
Deep breath.

Ok, now you understand why your grandmother can't come and that she loves you, and that's all that matters. Your aunt probably can't sympathize, or just wants everything to be perfect for you, but I'm sure she didn't mean to offend you. Unless she starts going on an on about it, it's probably better just to let it go. I'm sure her heart is in the right place.

You're probably a bundle of nerves right now, and it's understandable. The day before the wedding is the most stressful because you have all sorts of detail that need to be attended to. Don't Worry! It will all turn out beautifully, and you will have the day of your life. If you did what you could to plan and prepare, then I'm sure it will be wonderful (and if something comes up, just roll with it).

Have a wonderful day! And show off as much as possible:girly1:!! It's your day to shine!!

post #3 of 11
awww don't be sad!! Maybe your aunt was just saying what she thought you wanted to hear. Alot of brides aren't as understanding as you when people are unable to attended. You know your grandma loves you very much and that is all that matters!! You are going to have a wonderful wedding!!! Try not to stress over the little things too much!
post #4 of 11
Carrie, hon, deep breath!

Everyone has their own expectations of what a wedding *should* be, and sometimes those just aren't realistic given specific circumstances. Weddings bring out the best in people the day of, and sometimes the worst in people (unintensionally!) before. Everyone who is working on it is a ball of nerves like you are, although not quite to your extent since you are the bride.

Don't worry about everything being perfect! It either will be or it won't and more than likely something will happen to make your day a little different than originally planned. Not always a bad thing - that's what memories are made of. In the end, you and Roger will be married and that's really all that counts on Monday.
post #5 of 11
If she can't come, maybe you could make her a special photo album, just for her, and take it to her after the wedding. Then you could tell her all about the day as you show her the pictures.
Everything is going to work out in the end. Have a great wedding. Best Wishes!

post #6 of 11
Right, Dear Abby just had a letter about the very same thing a week or so ago! You could take a photo album and if it's not a lot of trouble, wear your dress so that she can see how beautiful you look as a bride. I think she'd be happy just knowing that you were thinking of her, even if she couldn't actually come. But calm down! If things go perfectly, or if your wedding video ends up on some "funniest videos" show, you'll be a new mrs. at the end of the day, and that's the whole point!
post #7 of 11
Just remember Carrie, even if your Grandma isn't there in body she will be with you in spirit! I am sure that your aunt just wants your wedding to be perfect for you and said what she did without thinking. You will have a wonderful day!
post #8 of 11
Hi Carrie

Don't worry!! I got married last August and I know exactly what you're going though Everyone in the wedding party will be stressed and people always say things without thinking, and because people are stressed they can take things the wrong way, etc, etc.

Try to relax and enjoy the run-up to Saturday. Everything always works out in the end and I'm sure you will have a fantastic day - Once Saturday comes, everyone forgets what's gone on in the past few days/weeks and they are all enjoying themselves and making sure you have the best day of your life.

I'd love to have my wedding day again

Good luck for Saturday - I'm sure you will have a fantastic day Don't forget to post some pics
post #9 of 11
Carrie, I'm so sorry your Aunt upset you with what she said. I'm glad you understand why your grandma can't make it..a trip that long is sometimes difficult for older people. Try to relax, I know it is hard to do, but I am sure your wedding will be perfect! I will be thinking of you Saturday!!! *hugs*
post #10 of 11
Carrie, I agree with the others, maybe you could visit your grandma soon after you are married and give her an album of your wedding pictures. I'm sure your grandma will really appreciate being able to visit with you.

I also wanted to mention another time that might be stressful for you, and that is the wedding rehersal(sp?) If it happens, just blow it off. My sister was so nervous and stressed during hers that she started laughing when they got to the part where she and her husband would exchange vows. By the next morning, she was absolutely calm and very radient. Her wedding day went smoothly, and yours will too. And your grandma will be there in spirit.
post #11 of 11
I agree - I don't think she meant to hurt you. I think the idea of a special album for your grandma is a great idea!!!! I hope you're able to do it, I'm sure you would enjoy being able to do that for her.

Carrie - do your best not to worry!!!! Take up this Mantra for the next two days: Everything is going to be wonderful!

...and just repeat it over and over and over and over and over and over....

See, that way you won't have time to let your pretty head worry you!!!!!!

Carrie - this is YOUR day! Don't focus on the wedding it's all ready to go - so just focus on the marriage!!! AND ENJOY IT!!!!!!

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