Cat punishes me by peeing on my bed. :-(

It's really disheartening because I often can't tell what will provoke this behaviour which makes it really hard to avoid. I feel like I'm walking on egg shells around him trying not to get him pissed off. For example, If he's scratching at the furniture and I reprimand him, I'll end up with cat urine all over my mattress. He doesn't like to be reprimanded. Also, if i don't feed him quickly enough to his liking when I get home from work he'll do the same. If I reprimand him for biting me when I'm playing with him, same result. This has been going on for 5 years. I've had him to the vet several times and he is perfectly healthy. There are no other cats in the house and I keep the litter box extremely clean.

I've read the sticky about innapropriate peeing but am still at a loss. Does this cat just not like me or something? Or is he just a little tyrant? At what point does one give up and think about finding him a new home? I feel incredibly guilty as I consider myself an animal lover but i feel like he has me by the proverbial ****. I've had several cats before but I have to say this experience has made me never want to ever have another again.

My coworker has this issue. She got a duvet cover and stuffed it with tin foil as the cat hates the noise it makes. She makes sure when she is not in bed to put the duvet on it....he won't even get on the bed! He may find alternate places to pee but one thing at a time!

Originally Posted by Brette

It's really disheartening because I often can't tell what will provoke this behaviour which makes it really hard to avoid. I feel like I'm walking on egg shells around him trying not to get him pissed off. For example, If he's scratching at the furniture and I reprimand him, I'll end up with cat urine all over my mattress. He doesn't like to be reprimanded. Also, if i don't feed him quickly enough to his liking when I get home from work he'll do the same. If I reprimand him for biting me when I'm playing with him, same result. This has been going on for 5 years. I've had him to the vet several times and he is perfectly healthy. There are no other cats in the house and I keep the litter box extremely clean.

I've read the sticky about innapropriate peeing but am still at a loss. Does this cat just not like me or something? Or is he just a little tyrant? At what point does one give up and think about finding him a new home? I feel incredibly guilty as I consider myself an animal lover but i feel like he has me by the proverbial ****. I've had several cats before but I have to say this experience has made me never want to ever have another again.

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Well when you say you "reprimand" him what exactly are you doing? The fact is, you are right, cats do not like to be "reprimanded".

From your cat's perspective he is being chastised for behavior that is perfectly natural to a cat. He doesn't know that scratching his claws on this piece or that piece of furniture is wrong. From his point of view he's probably thinking, "I'm just scratching my nails, why is "she" getting mad at me?"

Your cat doesn't know that when you get in from work, you're tired and need a few minutes to chill, all he knows is that he is *hungry* so why is "she" not feeding me right away?!?!? Why is "she" making me wait, can't "she" see I'm hungry?!?!? She must be punishing me for something again.

Shucks, even when we are playing "she" gets mad at me if I bite "her". I don't understand, aren't we just playing??

Brette, cats and discipline simply don't mix. Just think, if you were being "reprimanded" all the time for what you considered to be normal behavior, you would begin to get pretty irate after a while. It's the same thing with your cat.

When your cat does something you don't like you need to redirect his attention. You also have to be consistent and fair and *patient*. Cats can be very stubborn but with patience and a loving attitude, you would be amazed at what you can accomplish.

For example, does your cat have a scratching post? With patience and love, you can teach him to scratch only there. Rubbing cat nip on a scratching post is a wonderful way to attract his attention. It's also best if you have more than one so he has more choices where he can scratch.

You can try wrapping heavy duty plastic, you can probably find some at a hardware store, around those places you don't want him to scratch. Cats can't get their claws into that so it deters them.

You might want to try Softpaws, but for me personally, and that's just me, the idea of glue on nails just doesn't seem healthy and I really don't know how long they can be safely used. But there are some here that have used Softpaws on their cats so they will be better able to inform you about that.

If he *does* bite you when you are playing, cry out loudly in pain "Ow! Ow!" and pull your hand away, your cries of pain will alert him that he has hurt you. Or, if you don't want him to bite you, don't play with him with your hands. There are all kinds of ways and toys that you can use to play with him.

Also when you get in from work, don't keep him waiting on your whim, just feed him right away. It really doesn't take long. Unless of course you have to use the bathroom first So, you do that and then you feed him.

Feeding time can be some loving time spent with your cat. For example, I always make a big deal with mine at feeding time. I talk to them, I tell them stuff like, "Yes I know you're hungry, it's coming, as I prepare it, and oh, this is going to be sooo good" and they purr and meow with happiness knowing that they are going to get a meal shortly. Also I love to pet them as they eat and my cats really love that.

The only thing I haven't mentioned is getting him checked for a UTI, which would normally be the first thing to do, but you said you have had him checked and that he is fine.

Brette, it's really easy to start over. Now it may take quite some time, but once your cat realizes he's not being "reprimanded" all the time, his love and trust in you will grow.

I had this same problem with a cat of mine, Sebastian, who I miss dearly. He had urinary difficulties throughout his life, then when he was 5 he died suddenly of kidnay failure. When I soke to the vet who tried to save him, they said that his potassium levels are throughout the roof.

Please make sure you get your kitty checked out by a vet ASAP. When cats misbehave by scratching and weeing inappropriately, it's often because they're trying to tell us something, besides, a human child can tell you they hurt and need to see a doctor, a cat can't. And I get a huge gut feeling that throughout his life, Sebastian was trying to tell me he doesn't feel well. One idea that may be worth trying is finding an animal communicator in your area.

I hate to sound glum, but it would be so great for another cat to escape the same fate Sebastian had.

The poster said she had already taken him to the vet for this problem, and they found nothing wrong.

I think the idea about making the bed area unattractive to the cat is a good one. First, try washing the bedding and mattress in an enzymatic cleaner to make sure that the smell is gone... the cat may have made a habit of going there because of lingering smell. Or it could be a particular texture of bedding that attracts him (my cat will pee on suede pillows, so I had to get rid of mine). I'd try new bedding entirely to see if things change. And try washing it first in a citrus-scented detergent, since cats dislike citrus scents.

The idea about tinfoil is also good.

I wonder if you could get one of those plastic outdoor tablecloths to cover the bed with when you aren't using it.

In terms of changing the behaviour, I had a lot of luck with buying a cat gym/climber for my cats. One cat never uses the couch, and one will once in a while, but if I catch him and move him to the cat climber he'll use that instead. My version of reprimanding is to say no in a stern voice and physically move the cat to where I'd rather him scratch. I believe that cats will associate a 'reprimand' with the behaviour eventually. Mine know that they aren't allowed on the kitchen counters and will skedaddle off the counter if they see me coming.

Thanks for all your ideas guys. I will try a few of them out for sure. And just to reiterate, the cat is not sick, has been to the vet several times. Eats well, is active, generally fit as a fiddle.

I should have clarified, my reprimand is a stern "no" and removing his claws from me or the couch etc which doesn't strike me as overly harsh. It's not only when he's repimanded though, he'll pee if I've been away. I've read this is pretty common. "Welcome back mom. While you were away I've done some "redecorating" of my own around the place".

He's really sensitive though and seems to take things extremely personally. I guess they all have their personalities and lucky me, I get this. And also, I'm not reprimanding him all the time as someone said. Only when he's destroying something or me.

I'm so desperate I may actually try the tinfoil thing even though it seems really ridiculous. I suppose I'm a dog person deep down. They've always adapted to my lifestyle as long as I meet their needs. I can't think of how else I can accomodate this little guy but he seems to have it in for me sometimes. I've read that innapropriate urination is one of the main reasons people put their cats down. Sad how this seems to be such a prevalent problem among cats!

Don't put project human emotions onto your cat. He isn't trying to punish you. He may be upset, he may have bad associations with the litter box, but he isn't having the thought process "I don't like what Brette did ... what does Brette hate ... Brette hates my urine on the bed ... I'll go urinate!" By all means, do anything you can to make him happier and more comfortable, but don't interpret urination as a weapon directed against you. It's not.

Since the cat is peeing on the owner's bed, I do think the behavior may be directed at the owner — stress, absence-related anxiety, or marking. There are some helpful chapters on this problem in a book by an animal behaviorist, called "The Cat Who Cried for Help." There, a cat was peeing on the female owner's belongings because the cat was upset over a new boyfriend who had moved in. The author of the book often recommends medication (such as Prozac) for such cases. Since in your case it's been going on for so long and is so difficult for you, it might be worth a try.

Some cats do learn that this kind of peeing gets a reaction from the owner, and do it purposely. An acquaintance of mine had a cat who, when reprimanded, would run to her bed and squat over it, then look up to the owner in a challenging way.

After reading yur last reply it sounds like you are miserable and not only don't like the behavoir but have a probelm with cats in general....it's okay not to be a cat person. You have a right to be happy and this little guy does too.

Do what is best for both of you.

Originally Posted by fifi1puss

After reading yur last reply it sounds like you are miserable and not only don't like the behavoir but have a probelm with cats in general....it's okay not to be a cat person. You have a right to be happy and this little guy does too.

Do what is best for both of you.

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I agree, you may want to consider re-homing him. Just a suggestion

I also want to apologize Brette if I misinterpreted your "reprimanding" comments. The internet isn't always the easiest medium by which to communicate and misunderstandings can happen.

It sounds as if by now these have become normal, everyday behaviours for your cat.

Can you close off your bedroom and just not allow him in there, and confine him to one room, with food, litter box and toys and maybe a window to sit at, while you're away?

Another option that just might work is to ask your vet for some anti-anxiety medication for him. Prozac or Buspar can work in some cases.

I also agree that perhaps re-homing would be best for both of you. It can't be pleasant for you to put with this constant behaviour.

Good luck!

I am having the same problem we have 3 cats one we had for a year (smokey)before recieving the 2nd (angel) and finding the 3rd (peaches) at around the same time when we first got them angel never did it but peaches did angel seen him and started doing it (monkey see monkey do right lol) then we got them fixed and eventually peaches stopped (except its his way of saying the box is dirty and meowes at the box so we keep it clean) but angel still does it but only on our bed where as before both angel and peaches did it any where they could find to. IDK what to do we are at our wits end with angel and she is my favorite and I dont have the heart to get rid of her. If anyone has any suggestions please email me
thank you
bekah