will she be to lonley?

cgeiser · Aug 20, 2008

Heres the story

I have two 16 week old kittens who are the best of friends. One of them Nola is incontinent and is going to a new home this week. My boyfriend and I have come to realize we just cannot keep her. We are working college students and do not have the the time or money to properly take care of her. And as much as it breaks my heart to see her go I know she will be happy in her new home.

My question is about my other kitten Sophie, she has never been an only cat. Of course we will play with her as much as possible, bit as she is still a kitten I wonder if thats enough. I don't want her to be too lonely especially when were not home. Does anyone have any suggestions for making her transition into only cat-dom easier?

laureen227 · Aug 20, 2008

you could always get a new kitten to keep her company...

cgeiser · Aug 20, 2008

yeah I was thinking about that, but I'm not sure I can afford it right now...adoption fees and shots get pretty expensive.

Plus I'm afraid I'll get a new kitten and they won't become friends. Some cats just don't like each other. Or are they young enough right now that it doesn't matter?

mrblanche · Aug 21, 2008

Sixteen weeks is old enough to be on their own, and cats are actually normally solitary animals. She may be lonesome for a few days, but if you give her plenty of attention, you may find she actually prefers it.

kalikat · Aug 21, 2008

My cat is an only cat, but we do have 2 dogs that she loves to torment & get them to chase her. There's usually someone always home, but if there's not I lock Blossom in the front of the house. I think she sleeps most of the day. Sometimes she's in my bedroom window when I leave & when I return. But I'm sure she sleeps on the bed, as she does when we're home.
I surpose if you were to get another cat, now would be the time while she's still young. Introductions should be made slowly.
http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=67321
Follow the link in the 1st paragraph.

laureen227 · Aug 21, 2008

Originally Posted by cgeiser

yeah I was thinking about that, but I'm not sure I can afford it right now...adoption fees and shots get pretty expensive.

Plus I'm afraid I'll get a new kitten and they won't become friends. Some cats just don't like each other. Or are they young enough right now that it doesn't matter?

she's young enough [imo] that if you follow the intro protocols, she'll do fine.
my Cable did just fine w/my Java [Cable was 6 months, Java 3.5] & i didn't even do the slo intro [don't have the facilities for it].

arlyn · Aug 21, 2008

Originally Posted by mrblanche

Sixteen weeks is old enough to be on their own, and cats are actually normally solitary animals. She may be lonesome for a few days, but if you give her plenty of attention, you may find she actually prefers it.

Please, I mean no offense, but this is simply not true!
Cats are social animals, their complex social interactions are very close to those of African Lions.
Lions will not accept newcomers at first either, but most prides will eventually adopt nomads once they become familiar.

Cats do much better with another of their own species, once they are older though, it takes longer for them to accept newcomers to their territory.
The solitary ones are the exception, not the rule, all you have to do is look at what happens when cats go feral.

To answer the OP's question though, if you do not think you can afford another cat, then yes, she can learn to be alone, and she probably will be lonely at first, but she will eventually get over it.
But, as students, can you afford to spend extra time with her, filling the void?
It's really a tough question and it really requires you to sit down, both of you, and weigh the pros and cons of each option.
Sorry to hear about the other kitten though, and good luck with Sophie, whatever you eventually decide.

mews2much · Aug 21, 2008

I would get another kitten and she is young enough for it to work out. See if you can get one cheap somewhere. My last two I got free.

jack31 · Aug 21, 2008

We felt extremely pressured to get a second kitten (especially by TCS) when we got Jack but we waited. He did great on his own--we were very cautious in making sure the house was safe so while we were gone he was safe as well as providing lots of attention when we were home, but overall I don't regret waiting to add a second cat to our life.

Jack was a stray and his costs were expensive, 12 weeks in and we'd spent $300 in vet bills. I was still in school and we were basically living on my husbands salary, another cat was out of the question. It took us 7 months to find a second cat we felt would fit our home and Jack very easily accepted Harley. Jack was almost a year old and Harley was about 14 months at adoption.

Have lots of toys, a quality diet and provide as much attention as possible when home and your kitten will be happy and healthy.

Leslie

zane's pal · Aug 22, 2008

Originally Posted by Arlyn

Please, I mean no offense, but this is simply not true!
Cats are social animals, their complex social interactions are very close to those of African Lions.
Lions will not accept newcomers at first either, but most prides will eventually adopt nomads once they become familiar.

Lynxes, bobcats, and Scottish Wildcats, who are all more closely related to the Domestic Cat than lions, are solitaries, as are tigers, leopards, jaguars, and pumas.

We've never had more than one cat at a time, and they've always done OK; they sleep most of the time anyway.

sohni · Aug 22, 2008

I think cats can do well either alone or with companion. They are extremely adaptable (people assume they will be lonely, but who really knows how a cat feels). When I was in college, I only had one cat and I think that is a good way to go for the time being. It's tough enough to make arrangements for one cat when you are renting. They do sleep a lot once they are over their young kitten stage.

It's not that difficult to introduce cats to each other once they are grown up. It just takes some time and patience, I have managed it many times.

arlyn · Aug 22, 2008

Don't get me wrong please, I didn't mean that they don't do fine on their own, I do indeed know that they do, I have a solitary right now, but she's also always been accepting of other cats, but happy alone too.

But domestic cats, by nature, are social.

Whatever the OP decides will not be detrimental to her cat, one way or the other, they are indeed, very adaptable.

mrblanche · Aug 22, 2008

Actually, domestic cats and the African wildcats from which they are descended are described as "normally solitary but adaptively social." What that means is that they are normally solitary, but they will share hunting grounds (if the territory is not currently in use) and will tolerate other cats if food is sufficient. The do not normally seek out social interaction with other cats, except at mating time. In fact, lions are actually the only social cats, with a normal hierarchy, etc. All other cats are defined as normally solitary when fully adult.

There has been much written about why cats adapted to human contact and co-habitation, and I doubt the definitive research has been done yet.

However, it is definitely true that most cats can and do get along just fine by themselves, if they are kept that way.

phelana · Aug 23, 2008

It is honest and kind of you to come here with this sad story. I feel horrid the other cat has to go. Why is she/he incontinent? Can you treat that? I believe the cat will miss the friend and rather than get a NEW one, find a way to treat the old one? It's my opinion. If you own pets you need to find the time to care for them. Believe me, I am a single Mom with 4 cats and 2 dogs and kids..I find a way to balance it all and it's not easy.

Best of luck...

missymotus · Aug 24, 2008

Originally Posted by mews2much

See if you can get one cheap somewhere. My last two I got free.

There's really no such thing as a free kitten

You're much better off getting one from a shelter that comes health checked, vaccinated, microchipped and spayed/neutered.

laureen227 · Aug 24, 2008

Originally Posted by missymotus

There's really no such thing as a free kitten

You're much better off getting one from a shelter that comes health checked, vaccinated, microchipped and spayed/neutered.

my Chip came from a shelter - to date, he's been the least expensive of my cats [was already neutered, vaxed {even declawed

}]. Firefox, my most recent "free" kitty, has been the most expensive - lots of initial health problems, had to pay for vax & spay.

seaturtle · Aug 24, 2008

Hi,

I had to re-home two of mine (I had 9, and 2 females were persecuted by all the others, they're so happy now in their new homes).

When I had my first kitten, she would yowl and yowl and follow me everywhere. I got a second kitten, and she was fine.

But the kitten you're keeping will be fine, I think. Sometimes, I've seen a cat just love it when all the attention is one them!

One option for later on: an older cat, less trouble, less watching out for, one with already vaccines and fixed. I run across people all the time who have to give up their adult cats for one reason or another and who are looking for a really good home.

You're being very conscientious about this. I know how it hurts to give one up (I still cry over mine, and they both went over 2 years ago), but what you're doing is best for the cat. And you've obviously given it a great deal of thought. I wish all cat owners were as thoughtful and careful as you are.
So I think with people like you, any cat would love his home, alone or with another one.

Seaturtle

cgeiser · Aug 24, 2008

Originally Posted by phelana

Why is she/he incontinent? Can you treat that?

She has manx syndrome, and believe me if there was some sort of surgery or medication to fix her we would have done it no matter the cost.

The good news is that my boyfriends mom called today and said that she was adjusting well. So I'm happy about that.

And thank you all for your responses. Its good to be reassured that sophie will be happy on her own.

kluchetta · Aug 24, 2008

I think the most telling aspect is the relative youth of the kitten. A kitten that is young and solitary will probably do well alone. (I've had at least 2 cats that were without feline companionship their whole lives and did just fine.)

And a kitten that has another cat or kitten introduced into their household will usually either accept or become very attached to the new feline.

In my experience, there IS a need, however, to provide a companion to an older cat who is used to companionship, but had their companion die or go to another home.

(My Clyde was owned by a co-worker, and the other cat died, and Clyde just couldn't cope, therefore he moved in with us.)

mews2much · Aug 24, 2008

The last 2 kittens I didnt pay to get were on thier way to the pound if I had not got them. Oreo is not normal and I knew that when I got her. She has fcks and looks like a 6 month old kitten even though she will be 1 on friday. Our Dog came from the pound and lived 15 years. Some of the ferals we caught also lived 15 years. I would not give a cat up just because it has problems either.

will she be to lonley?

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