My ego......

KittenKrazy

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has taken quite a beating of late! Now, before I start any fuss, let me say up front that I have no problems with gays/lesbians....I figure anyone has a right to whatever lifestyle they want, whatever makes you happy....BUT......when I was in high school and college, I can count on both hands the number of guys that I dated...I was terminally shy in high school, and during my first two years of college I carried a torch for the longest for a guy who had moved away.......now, after all these years, I have found out that three of those same guys are gay!......sheesh, kind of makes you wonder what kind of person I was to date, lol! ( I didn't think I was that bad) But then again, if you looked at the other guys that I dated, they're pretty much terribly "redneck".....so am just happy I found a man who is most suited to me.........has just been startling to find out that three out of a double handfull or less......
 

lorie d.

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I don't think it's a bad reflection on you that some of the guys you dated turned out to be gay. If they dated you, then I'm sure they had some feelings for you. IMO, people in high school and college are so young it's easy for someone that age to be confused about their sexuality.
 
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KittenKrazy

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Lorie, I guess what has tripped me out is that the one I learned about most recently, I in fact invited him to my Sr. prom because I didn't have anyone to go with and didn't want to go it alone.......lol!
 

mzjazz2u

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I've always been attracted to gay men that I didn't know were gay!
I think it's just that they are so much fun to be with.
 

carolpetunia

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This seems to happen to a lot of "good girls" -- never the girls who like bad boys on motorcycles, but the girls who are a little shy, make good grades, and respect their parents. Like me, and probably you.

Well, I have a theory about it. I think girls like that are just plain intimidated by boys who are strong and confident and intensely masculine -- so we find ourselves attracted to boys who aren't. And those often end up being the boys who are confused or frightened (or both) by their own sexuality.

All but one of my best male friends from high school turned out to be gay -- including the one I married (he was trying to fight it, because his religion told him he was "evil" for being what he could not help but be). I suffered a huge sense of rejection when we divorced, and I must admit that I never have really recovered from it.

But that was DUMB of me, and if I'd analyzed the situation correctly back then, I'm sure it would not have shaken my confidence so badly. Don't let that happen to you! After all, the way boys are at that age, a girl can hardly have a real conversation with 'em unless they ARE gay!


Originally Posted by mzjazz2u

I've always been attracted to gay men that I didn't know were gay!
I think it's just that they are so much fun to be with.
The best party I've ever been to was at a house full of gay men (I was one of two women the host invited, because he knew he could trust us to keep his secret). Everybody there sang or played the piano or did stand-up or something -- such a great, fun crowd!
 

mrblanche

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I'm going to kind of support that; I'm not gay, but I've been accused of it, and I think it comes from a very "gentle" upbringing. My mom couldn't get along with anyone for any length of time, at least not to stay married to them, so I was mostly just raised by her, in a church that was very much against violence of any kind.

I got along great with a lot of girls, and I was almost always disappointed in the kind of guys they would fall for, especially since it was rarely ME! Why do you girls like the bad boys? Is it the mothering instinct?

Anyway, I've discovered an acquaintance or two who turned out to be gay. And I have realized that one of my favorite high-school teachers was a lesbian. I'm sure everyone else knew it; I just thought she was a great teacher.
 

j_f_a

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Well you could look at it in a negative light and let your ego get bruised or look at it in the positive and be hightly flattered. For example, the number of gay friends of mine far exceed one hand. But several of them despite not liking women have confessed a torch for me, asked me out or made improper suggestions to that effect.So by mid term one year I was affectionatly and jokingly deemed the cure for gays. (The gays dubbed me with that title so please noone be offended it was a joke.) A huge ego boost!
 

cata_mint

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Maybe its because I'm a...
I went gay clubbing on friday and it was wonderful. I find that gay men are generally more considerate than straight men, and the atmosphere was so relaxed.

Don't forget that sexuality is a spectrum. Just because they're dating men now, doesn't mean that the feelings they had for you and moments you shared together weren't real.
Like J_F_A says, I would take it as 'I'm so great I turned him straight'
 

mrblanche

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Of course, guys DO say that the fastest way to get into bed with a woman is to tell her you're gay. The women believe the guys just haven't met a really good woman yet!

But, hey, here I am on a cat web site, where I represent less than 10% of the population here!
 
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