may I vent a moment?

mom2raven

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A little over a month ago I took a job because we have been really broke. We have 3 little kids (almost 5, 3 years 8 months, and 1 year 8 months) and cannot afford daycare for 3 kids so we worked it out so my husband works during the day (he does concrete) and I work evenings/nights (fast food).
During the week I go in at 7 and work until close (12 on Sunday through Thursday, and 1 on Friday and Saturday, it usually takes a half an hour beyond that to clean). On weekends I go in at 3, so on weekends I get around 20 hours. It is a good solution, although I am still struggling with getting MUCH less sleep.
Anyway, I just did another grueling weekend. I got up this morning, because one of our kids wakes up at 6 and since my husband is getting up and ready for work and has to leave by 8 I have to get up to be with the kids.
I got up and saw the state of the house! My husband did not do anything! I take that back, he loaded and ran the dishwasher.
I spent half the day on Friday cleaning the house so he would have a clean realxing house for the weekend, and now it is filthy again!
 
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mom2raven

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I just feel like I am working my butt off, I have a full time job and I am doing it on 4 hours of sleep a night (and trying to catch a 5th hour during the kids nap time) and I still have all the same responsibilities at home.
 

fwan

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I know how you feel.
I worked 16 hours a day, with just getting 4 hours of sleep, some nights i'd get home and FH hadn't eaten yet, so on top of that i made dinner. We have no dish washer, our dishes piled up. The apartment was a complete mess and filth. Now it's not as bad, I was able to do that for two months long and then my body broke down, then i did it again back in Feb for a month and now i can't even work 16 hours a day anymore as my body wont let me, unless it's only 2 - 3 days in a row. You really need to take care of your health, because one day you are going to break down and not be able to do it with such little sleep.

a new solution will arise
 

gailc

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You need to sit down with your husband and hash out how the housework is going to get done by the both of you. Its hard with your children being so young. Decide what is critical to be done-laundry/dishes and what can slide a bit.
You need to get a bit more sleep too as you don't want to get run down.
 

rone

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Originally Posted by mom2raven

I just feel like I am working my butt off, I have a full time job and I am doing it on 4 hours of sleep a night (and trying to catch a 5th hour during the kids nap time) and I still have all the same responsibilities at home.
Men
...sit him down and explain to him what you did. The housework need to be split up in a way that both of you find acceptable. Some men don't think about stuff like this, they need someone to tell them exactly what needs to be done.
 

mer636

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things should be 50/50 in the cleaning so sit your husband down and explain that you can't be wonder woman all the time and still stay healthy
 

cococat

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Originally Posted by mom2raven

A little over a month ago I took a job because we have been really broke. We have 3 little kids (almost 5, 3 years 8 months, and 1 year 8 months) and cannot afford daycare for 3 kids so we worked it out so my husband works during the day (he does concrete) and I work evenings/nights (fast food).
Anyway, I just did another grueling weekend. I got up this morning, because one of our kids wakes up at 6 and since my husband is getting up and ready for work and has to leave by 8 I have to get up to be with the kids.
I spent half the day on Friday cleaning the house so he would have a clean realxing house for the weekend, and now it is filthy again!
You sound really overloaded - hugs to you for doing so much for your family! My husband is great at cleaning but I also spend my "day off" cleaning, laundry, meals, stuff with the animals, etc. I wish it would just stay clean all the time, but that isn't life in our zoo. I don't have kids so I just can't imagine how much harder it is to keep clean with kids. Sounds like you are doing a good job though with all that is on your plate but you got to talk to your husband and let him know your feelings about this!
 
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