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Can't Punish Your Kids Anymore?! - Page 2

post #31 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by CC12 View Post
I would be interested in hearing more about this case. My question is why a 12 year old is spending unsupervised time on a computer? I allow my daughter to use a computer but it is strictly monitored. What kind of dating site? An adult site or a site with other 12 year olds? Not that that is safe but it seems a bit strange. If you told her not to go on dating sites once then why is she getting another opportunity to be on a computer alone much less posting anything.
The father had blocked those sites on her computer at home.
So she went to a friend's house and used HER computer because the other kid's parents hadn't used the blocking feature.
I suppose you could say the father shouldn't have let his daughter visit her girlfriend but at some point you have to trust the kids go over to other kids' houses and not assume the worst. In this case the 12-year old seems determined to be her own worst enemy.
post #32 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by ckblv View Post
Not all kids are like you. Some kids need spanking.
I was spanked, NOT beaten.

spanking does not = beaten

What a bizarre concept.


again, THANK-You!!!

Way to those that MISSED my point entirely!

I spend time around *kids* ALOT, considering i have 10 nieces and nephews all under 15, and 2 more cousins that are under 21, and a brother that is 15!


I know that as i akid, if i did something hugly bad, i would get a swat on the butt, NEVER BEATEN.

We were taught there is a REAction to our Actions. If you did something wrong, you got grounded/something taken away.

Ex. I stayed out late, didnt call home, didnt ask, etc. When i did get home, i got a talkin to, and grounded. Phone time got taken away.

Some kids CANNOT be reached, and for those, im truly feel bad, because they are going to see life on the inside of a jail cell, not a loving family or friends.


What i was SAYING was alot of kids nowadays are being given everything under the sun. Games, cellphones, Ipods, tv's, cars.They dont get grounded, or told NO often enough because the parents want to appear "cool". They have a warped sense of right and wrong, and run over their parents!

Time out's dont work, and when the LAW takes away a parents right to disopline a child, that child will grow up with a warped sense of right and wrong, and think its OK to do things they see in video games,and thats why we have kids that carry guns, sell drugs and whever else they WANT to.


Im only 30, and back when i was in High School, no one even THOUGHT of carry a gun or weapon to school! Sure there were drugs, and some kids did them, but alot DIDNT. We never really LIKED our parents rules, but we still respected our parents enough to do as we were told.

If i EVER told my mom " Hell no!" or "F OFF" i would gotta a fast slap! Not like that now. Kids swear at their parents, and tell them "if you touch me, i'll call DCF!!"

Its INSANE! Nothing really shocks me anymore when it comes to kids/teens. Not weapons, not pregnancy, not drugs.

you want to see how screwed up these kids/adults are? just watch a court show like Judge Alex or Judy, or Maury Povach.
post #33 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2dogmom View Post
The father had blocked those sites on her computer at home.
So she went to a friend's house and used HER computer because the other kid's parents hadn't used the blocking feature.
I suppose you could say the father shouldn't have let his daughter visit her girlfriend but at some point you have to trust the kids go over to other kids' houses and not assume the worst. In this case the 12-year old seems determined to be her own worst enemy.
I was only wondering how she got access. In this case she willfully disobeyed him by going to her friend's house and breaking the rules. Oh I would be really mad. For lying AND disobeying AND making someone else an accomplice.
post #34 of 42
I had a lady come through my line with 2 very well behaved children, the smaller of the 2 started acting up. She looked at him and said, if you do not stop that rig now, you will get a spanking right here. He stopped immediately. She looked embarrassed, and told me, I really don't beat my kids, just a spanking when they need it. I had to tell her how much I admired the way she had such well behaved kids, and kids just sometimes need one.
The next ones through were lucky they were not my kids, they were awful brats, and mom could not control them. She kept screaming at them "you are going to get a time out." Apparently that is not much of a punishment.
post #35 of 42
Thread Starter 
Not only in 1957, but 1967 and 1977 too. After that things went down hill, especially in the last decade.


Quote:
Originally Posted by ckblv View Post
SCHOOL -- 1957 vs. 2007

These are some new ones, hilarious



Scenario:
Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.
1957
- Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2007 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.


Scenario:
Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1957 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.


Scenario:
Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1957 - Mark shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2007 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario:
Pedro fails high school English.
1957 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2007 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English..

Scenario:
Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1957 - Ants die.
2007- BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario:
Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1957 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.
post #36 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by Natalie_ca View Post
Not only in 1957, but 1967 and 1977 too. After that things went down hill, especially in the last decade.

thats the sad part. back then things were simple. now there is to much involved, and they make things out of NOTHING.
post #37 of 42
This is exactly why I am scared to have children
post #38 of 42
I don't agree with hitting your kids to punish them but this is just way out of line for the court.
post #39 of 42
We had a lot of family that got together this past holiday weekend and the subject of kids and the lack of discipline came up. A quick swat on the rump never did us any harm when we were growing up.
post #40 of 42
No but I think like any other punishment if it is the default, knee-jerk reaction to misbehaviour after a while it loses its effectiveness. I don't have children yet (about two weeks and counting) but I would hope that if I ever spanked one of them it would be a considered decision, not something done out of anger, and an absolute last resort.

There are other ways of disciplining children and I've seen them used to wonderful effect. In fact, many of the forms of discipline I use with my dogs I plan to use with my kids. They're all based around the same principles and they work beautifully with the doggies so I figure, why not?
post #41 of 42
Quote:
In fact, many of the forms of discipline I use with my dogs I plan to use with my kids. They're all based around the same principles and they work beautifully with the doggies so I figure, why not?
Well, I'm pretty sure crating is frowned upon. Using a leash seems to be acceptable up to a certain age. Not sure how well clicker training would go over.

Good luck!
post #42 of 42
LOL! Classic.

Well, we don't crate them, so that's out. My Mum used to have me on a leash when we went shopping because I was liable to disappear without warning and in the one, split-second when she wasn't looking, and as for clicker-training, well, hadn't thought of that but my what a good idea!! I taught Ruby to sit in about four minutes with a clicker when she was a puppy. I wonder if I could do the same thing with this little one??
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