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Im so upset right now!! *Venting*

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 
So this has to do with Jack and Something off topic...

This is gonna sound pathetic but... I have NO friends... accept for the few people I talk to at work who are adults and the one who is my age but she lives to far to hang out with, and theres my friends from out of state who I only talk to online and rarely on the phone. Im not in school to make friends and I dont get out enough to meet people (theres no where to go but the Shelter)... but there is this one family right across the street from us who has 2 kids my age... and when I talked to the girl yesterday (about the baby Robin) she seemed nice. But my mom wont let me become friend with them because she heard a Rumor that these people are druggies... plus my mom thinks there house looks trashy (I hate to say it but theres looks better than ours) and she says "I know character and those people are bad" SHE HASNT EVEN SAID ONE WORD TO THEM!!! There the only people around that I could become friends with and my mom wont let me! its freakin retarded! I havnt hung out with anyone since the end of '06 cause ive yet to know anyone who lived near me, yet when someone finally comes along im not allowed to even say hi to them!!
And I might not be able to work at the Shelter anymore cause the Girl signed up to Volunteer.... im afraid if my mom finds out that shes gonna stop me from going to the Shelter!

Then theres Jack... hes been missing for 2 days... my moms convinced hes not coming back so she sent my sister to the peoples house across the street to pick a Kitten out of the litter they have!!! I mean WTH!!! I dont want to be here anymore... this house is all Chaos and its really making me upset lately!!!
Im gonna put up a Missing add on Craigslist and im gonna walk around the block and look for him... cuz no one else will
post #2 of 13
That your mom opens her heart and gets to know these guys before judging them.

And for Jack to come home!!
post #3 of 13
awwwww that jack will come home and i'll be your friend
post #4 of 13
Thread Starter 
Aww thanx guys... I so hope Jack will come home, im so worried sick! When/if he does come home im claiming him as mine.. seeing as my lil sister isn't worried about him at all and is worried about her "new" kitten (who I honestly think is ugly) and no one else offered to help, there all just assuming hes gone forever

Its not that I dont have friends at all.. its just I dont have anyone to hang out with and to work on my social skills (my social skills are going to crap.. I get nervous now when I talk to new people so I cant talk right)... I sit at home 24hrs a day 7 days 4-6 days a week with no way of meeting new people and I think I need to do something active and socially.
post #5 of 13
Originally Posted by Vixen16 View Post
with no way of meeting new people and I think I need to do something active and socially.
I hope that changes for you soon It is a shame that your mother is judging your friends and that she is just being overprotective.
Is she worried that somehow you would be hurt, like maybe she thinks that if after the "honeymoon stage" the friendship will cool off and she is worried that you would be emotionally devastated?? Or do you feel like it's a selfish kind of keeping you to herself
You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders
post #6 of 13
I hope little Jack returns soon
and i'll be your friend too!
post #7 of 13
sounds like you need to be more rebellious.

Youre 16 why arent you at school?
post #8 of 13
awwwwwww i'm really sorry for you
your mum is wrong to think that there bad if
she hasent met them. you have.
and its your decicion
just sit her down and tell her how you feel.
she has to understand.

i'm so sorry
post #9 of 13
Thread Starter 
Its a shelfish thing.. im not sure what you mean by Honeymoon stage... but I know its more a shelfish thing.

Im the only one in our family that isnt rebellious and still my mom doesnt trust me... I quit school a yr and a half ago cuz my brother got really sick and just never went back.

My mom isnt the type of person you can just sit down and talk to... if she has something in her head it stays no matter what.

But thanx anyway for your support guys .
post #10 of 13
I hope things work out for you!

When I was 17, my parents packed us up and moved to North Carolina from New Jersey. I never really made friends there. I might have hung out with 1 or 2 people on one occasion, and then barely ever spoke again. I would talk to some people in school, but I was only there for a year (my senior year, so I was leaving in a few months!)

Then at 18, I moved to South Carolina to be with my boyfriend (who is now my husband). I had one friend there that I hung out with a bit, until she decided to get a fake ID with a few girls she worked with and went bar hopping with a fake ID for 2 years before turning 21. I wasn't into that and didn't want to risk getting caught with a fake ID anyway. So there went a friend I had. I considered Rob's friends to be mine, since he insisted that since I was his girlfriend, the friends were mutual. They were basically in a car club group, and I was part of that car club too. But slowly they faded out as well - for both of us! We really learned at our wedding reception who our friends truly were. And even now, some only call Rob when they want a deal on a transmission - never for anything else.

I think I've started to get used to not caring so much now. I work a lot, and so does he. By the time we get home, we rarely want to do much except relax together. The neighbor comes over from time to time and we talk to him, but I think he is more Rob's friend than mine. I'll go over there and we'll have fun on occasion, but he likes to drink a lot, and I'm not into needing to drink every time I go over, or want to get plastered on holidays. (Weird for a 21 year old, eh?)

I miss my friends in New Jersey. My best friend of 16 years lives in Indiana now, another lives in Missouri and is moving to Colorado, and I've got two friends who claim they are going to move to SC, but I've heard that for a year or two! Unfortunately, Rob doesn't want to move north (which will always be my favorite place). I'm glad I've gotten used to the situation with not having many friends (though I do talk to people I work with, we just don't hang out outside work, except the wedding reception or going out to lunch on workdays occasionally). I've changed a lot since I was 17 and living to have a ton of friends to do crazy things with.

It's not for everyone though, so I hope things start looking up for you! I hope your mom doesn't continue to judge your neighbors for no reason without knowing them first!
post #11 of 13
Oh honey, I'll be your friend too! I know it's not the same though. Have you checked to see if there are any youth groups in your area? I know it's hard walking into something like that by yourself, but it could be worth it.

Have you thought about going back to school? Or maybe seeing if you could get your GED? I'm not sure of the rules for GED, if you have to be 18 or not, but you can look into it.

As for the girl you met, I agree...sit your mom down and tell her that you need friends. She shouldn't judge just based on rumors. Maybe see if you could invite her over for dinner so your mom could get to know her. Maybe if she got to know her, it would open her mind a little. It could be that older people in the family are doing, or have done drugs, but that doesn't mean that she is too.

I hope you find Jack. Little One got away from us last spring and a few days after she left we got terrible storms...we found her a week later laying on the front porch waiting to be let in. We're guessing that the storms freaked her out enough that she stayed hidden for a few days. Sending prayers and vibes that he will find his way home.
post #12 of 13
Thread Starter 
I guess my brother went over to talk to the family... now tell me this: would anyone else be offended if someone walked up to you and amongst the convo used the "N" word?? I know I would... my brother did that to them and not everybody like/dislikes the same thing as my family and they got offended by it.. now my mom is basing my brothers convo with them on how they are

I have thought about going back to school.. I just never actually got there, than after the first yr my mom was all like "its useless going back cuz youll have to do the 2 yrs over again"... which it true and does make since. I went to a GED place and talked to the lady for a half hr about house I could get me GED before 18 but theres no way... so I just gotta wait a yr (I turn 17 on the 20th) to get my GED.

See... I cant stand not being able to get out of my house... and I love having friends I can hang out with, If I dont be social and get out of the house I go through depression.. its horrible. My mom wants me to quit the Shelter just so she doesnt have to drive there anymore... but the Shelter is the only thing thats keeping me from hitting the Depression stage.. so I refuse to quit.

Im thinking about just moving out to CA in a couple months, my friend invited me to go out there and live with her till my Boyfriend gets back from overseas... Im thinking it might help me with this whole "Useless" feeling.
post #13 of 13
Hon, how is going back to school "useless"? Not only will you be spending time with people your own age and making friends, but you will also be getting you HS diploma. To me, there's nothing useless in that. Yes, you will have to finish your last two years, that's a given, but it's better than sitting around the house waiting until you are old enough to get your GED. It sounds like you mom doesn't want you to do anything for yourself.

And, if you move out to CA, what are you going to do? First, how are you going to get out there? Do you have money saved? What are you going to do when you get there? You need to get money to pay bills, buy food, pay for transportation. Just some things to think about.

Is there any public transportation around there so you don't have to depend on your mom to drive you everywhere? If so, think about getting a second job for the summer (stay at the shelter, of course). Are you getting paid at the shelter or is it volunteer? If not, and if there isn't any transportation (or any that you can afford), check around the neighborhood and see if anyone has any odd jobs you can do. That will get a little bit of money in your pocket and give you a little bit of freedom.

I wish I could help you more, but it really sounds like you need to sit your mom down and talk to her about how you feel.
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