The most difficult and heart breaking decision i've had to make in a long time...

I absolutely do think you are making the best decision, especially since it IS so hard for you - it's akin to making the decision to euthanize, by putting the kitty's needs before our own.

But it's really a happy ending for her, especially as she'll be with your mom! and for Jasmine.

As soon as i started reading this,
my first thought was to take her back to your mothers house.
i will be willing to bet that works just fine.

it my very well be, that with all the moving, and foster animals you have it is upsetting her. Just a guess.

i hope that things work out for her at your mother's/

I'm so sorry you had to rehome her. But I'm glad it's with your mom. At least you'll be able to see her! If she seemed happier there, maybe she still will be. The puppy may be an issue, but hopefully she will like him/her. I am sending good luck prayers Jasmine's way!

thanks you guys. i'm glad ya'll seem to think i'm making the right decision- it helps a little. i'm still soo torn up about this and just can't stop crying over it. i've been holding jasmine all day she's soo sweet, always giving my kisses and purring. i just hate to do this, i feel like she won't understand. i don't want her to think i'm abandoning her i do feel like maybe she will be happier with my mom though. she is already bonded to her and all of the other animals except the pup, she is comfortable in that house- maybe that's what she needs

this is so hard for me to do- but i feel like if it makes her happy then maybe it's the right thing to do. at least i can see her whenever i want to that way too...and i know she loves my mom- i feel good about that part. she will be treated just as well over there and loved just as much.

none of this behavior started until she moved in with me and colin and that's why i think maybe she was happier there. maybe moving her just stressed her out too much- two moves in a year- first into our old house and then into our new one in feb. (i haven't been fostering much lately so she hasn't had any new animals around really). i think maybe she just misses her home with my mom. i hope it works out there, i feel like i've tried everything at this point.

Nikki, you aren't "giving up" on her. You're taking her back to where she was possibly happiest. And it's not like you're just giving her away or anything, she's going to your mom. She won't be far away, you KNOW she'll take excellent care of her, & you can visit whenever.

You're doing nothing wrong, you did nothing wrong to make Jasmine unhappy. It's just her nature & the fact that you can recognize that & be pro-active in making her happy just proves how good of a meowmy you are.

I think you are making the right decision for her. I know how hard these decisions can be to come to. We're in a position right now with one of ours trying to determine, and almost hoping, if there is a health issue behind his problem. I hope for the sake of both of you that she will be happier with your mom.

Wow I just saw your message and thought something worst happened. I hope she does well at your mom's so you can at least visit her.

I know how frustrating it is cause Connor is the same way.

For you during the healing process.

Originally Posted by white cat lover

Nikki, you aren't "giving up" on her. You're taking her back to where she was possibly happiest. And it's not like you're just giving her away or anything, she's going to your mom. She won't be far away, you KNOW she'll take excellent care of her, & you can visit whenever.

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Yea that.

When I read the title of this thread, I thought it was going to be a lot worse. At least if she's happy at your mom's place, you can still go visit her and everything. I think you're doing a good thing for her, even if it is hard.

Oh Hon, you arent abandoning her, you're returning her to where she calls home! The first thing I thought of when I started reading this was god hope her mom can take her and since she can I think all this is wonderfull!! You will be amazed at how fast a cat can get use to a dog too! Things will be great, just give it a month or so!

No need to feel bad. I know it feels like a horrible decision, but she's happy at your mum's, and you know that not only is she going to a great home, but you can see her regularly. You're not rehoming her, she's just going to stay with your mum - big difference!

You've done all you can, and I think have made a great decision.

You are being selfless and loving.
You have gone above and beyond what you could do and have truly exhausted every avenue. Is she is with your mother you know she will be cared for and you can visit her. It is a win for both of you.

You're doing the right thing. You've taken all the right steps and she's still not happy. At least (as others have said) you know she's going to a good home and hopefully she'll be happier there.

I agree this is the right solution. Like everyone said, you aren't rehoming her...you are taking her back to what she thinks of as "home". Moving can be hard on cats. Some deal with it fine, others just never settle in. I think she will be much happier at your mom's. And, I doubt that it's because she loves your mom more...she probably just misses her favorite napping spot or hidey hole. She misses what she is used to.

And, I wouldn't worry too much about the puppy. Puppies are looking for their place in the pack, and cats have a way of putting them in their place REAL quick!

I know you will miss her, but you know she is going to a good home, and you are doing what will make her happiest.

Thank you so much everyone for all of the support It's really made me feel a great deal better about the whole situation. I told Colin about what everyone had said as well and we both feel like even though it's a hard choice- it may just be the right one for Jasmine.

It's around 5 now and i'm waiting to hear from my mom when she gets off work tonight (soon). I am not feeling so great today so i will likely take her over there later on tonight or tomorrow night. In the mean time i've just been spending a lot of time with Jasmine and trying to spoil her.

The thing that worries me though is Isabella- her and Jasmine have been pretty much inseperable since I brought Izzy home as a kitten. She thinks Jasmine is her "mommy" They sleep together, eat together, groom each other, play together.....it's going to be really hard splitting them up. Isabella likes it here better though than when she was at my mom's house. She's come out of her shell soo much she she moved into the new house and has bonded well with the other animals. I hate to split her and Jasmine up but i know Isabella will regress if she goes back to my mom's house. Izzy is a momma's girl and that's it - she dislikes pretty much anyone else except for me so i know that would make her a bundle of nerves. Right now i'm just praying Isabella and Jasmine do ok seperated from one another- but i'm really worrying about it. Izzy slept on top of Jasmine's crate all night long last night and hasn't left her side at all today I feel soo bad about this- i know they're going to miss each other.

I'm at least going to give it a try tough and just see what happens. With the other two cats staying here Isabella at least won't be alone so hopefully she will adjust. / Jasmine is so sweet and tends to do well in most situations that i think she'll be ok going back to my mom's place, but i know without a doubt Izzy would not so i'm just hoping for the best right now with both of my girls.

Colin and I are leaving on Tuesday to go to Alabama and see his family for a few days, so when i get back- depending on how Jasmine does and all we will make our final decision- that will give Jasmine a few days to see how she does back at my mom's house. Hopefully all will go well. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

oh hon, don't worry, you aren't abandoning her! you are being so loving and selfless for her, its breaking my heart!

I truly hope she does well at your mom's, even with her being so attached to Isabella. If she does well, at least you will know that she is happy, loved, well cared for, and you can visit her whenever you like!

sending lots of and

Well, i just heard from my mom a few minutes ago. We are going to wait until tomorrow to take her to my mom's house- that way my mom will have the entire weekend off to watch her and help with the adjustment. I think that is a good idea I'm starting to feel a little more calm and at ease with the decision. We are going to just try it out for a week or so and see how she does- if all goes well she will stay with my mom, if not though we'll just bring her back to my house and then i dunno what else we'll do but we'll just have to try something else.

My mom is going to come over to my house tomorrow to pick up Jasmine and take her back so that i don't have to drive with her and be upset (i know i'll cry the whole drive so i think that's a better choice.) My mom is excited about having Jasmine back at home with her and i feel better knowing how much my mom loves her. It's been a tough decision to make- but i think i'm doing the right thing for Jasmine. I just pray everyone adjusts well and she is truely happy there.