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French court rules on virginity

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 
I fail to see what the big deal is here. After all the women lied about being a virgin when she married the guy.
post #2 of 12
Even though we have so many no-fault states, fraud is still a legitimate reason in the US for divorce in the states where you have to give some sort of reason, if I'm not mistaken (might be...too late to do much research).

I mean, if the woman convinced the man she was an airline pilot or a pastor or a vegetarian just to get him to marry her, and it turned out not to be the case, he'd still have the same right to seek a divorce, IMO. The fact that sex is at the heart of it all is the only reason it even made the news.
post #3 of 12
Ruh roh! My niece is about to wed a muslim man from North Africa who lives in France and they are getting married in Paris. I'm sending her mom (my sister) this link!

My opinion? Same as Jen C.'s.
post #4 of 12
Leave aside the mix of sex and religion that got it into the headlines for a moment. In the US you are not bound by any contract which seriously contradicts the law. For example, a doctor cannot make you sign a contract waiving your right to sue for malpractice as a condition of treatment. So to the extent that insisting someone be a virgin as a condition of marriage is considered unreasonable (which I think in France would be the case) the court should not uphold it.
Just my opinion!
post #5 of 12
Goodness, if virginity is that important to that man, he could strap on some explosives, blow something up in the name of Allah and go to his heaven where he can have as many virgins as he wants.
post #6 of 12
I am sorry the woman lied. If someone lied to me about something that was very important to me and I found it was a lie soon after marriage yes I would get a divorce.

Lets take sex out of the equation. Lets say you are dating a guy. And you tell him I do not want to be with someone who is a drug addict. That it was a deal breaker for you and you would leave someone if they were. And he agrees and says he is not. And during all of your courtship with this person they lie and sneak around to keep their addiction a secret. And lets say you get married and that night (or a week later whatever) this guy decides he has you now no need to lie anymore. And you find out that that he is a addicted to crack, cocaine, meth etc. You are telling me you would stay in that and you would not want the court to granted you a divorce on the fact he lied, misrepersented himself.

I tell you if I was in that postion I would hit the door running even if not court would grant my divorce. I would not stay with someone who purposely lied to me just to get me.
post #7 of 12
The only part of it that seems wrong is how he proved she wasn't a virgin. It's unrealistic/inaccurate/etc to expect a woman to bleed like a stuck pig when she first has sex, so if that was the only thing used as proof then he failed to prove anything. If he actually found out that she slept with someone else...

Well, why would she want to be married to such a jerk anyway? Courts shouldn't be able to make you stay married for any reason, ever, so it's hard to say they should have been forced to stay together.
post #8 of 12
Originally Posted by Yosemite View Post
Goodness, if virginity is that important to that man, he could strap on some explosives, blow something up in the name of Allah and go to his heaven where he can have as many virgins as he wants.
post #9 of 12
All I can say is what the heck!
post #10 of 12
Frankly, I don't think virginity -- or sex at all -- is really what's at stake, it's being lied to. Telling a lie isn't a really good way to start a relationship that involves trust. Maybe she didn't know it was important to him and thought it was a "little white lie." Well, even if you think little white lies are OK, there's a pretty big miscommunication problem there. Something that should have been settle before tying the knot. Maybe they would have realized their values were too at odds.
post #11 of 12
I'd also like to know how he PROVED that she wasn't a virgin....did he have testimony from someone that slept with her? Did she tell him she wasn't? Some women doen't even have hymens (sp?) so that is not a determining factor.

post #12 of 12
How did he know? I would want to know that. Did she confess or did he think so because she wasn't intact? Not to be too graphic but not all women are intact and can in fact break through by other means.
I understand if that is your requirement and you have been lied to you don't want to be married to a liar. Not a good way to start a marriage.
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