Need help homing a stray female

Hi everyone,

It is with a heavy heart I am writing this. This winter we had a feral female who was in really bad shape start hanging around. She would grab the feed dishes outside and run off with them. After a few weeks of talking to her and finally being able to pet her I brought her inside to find out she was very pregnant. Took her to the vet and ofcourse they wouldn't do anything while she was pregnant so I brought her home to deliver her babies.

She has turned into the sweetest kitty ever ( when she is alone or 1 other cat) But I have with her 5 cats. Baby is just now fully weaned so we have introduced her to the gang. And things arent going so well. She is a nervous wreck and the other cats are feeding off of it. Mama cat just stays in 2 rooms and growls all the time. She hunkers when she walks and wants nothing to do with the other guys. That I could live with. But now she is so stressed she is taking it out on anyone who touches her. I hate to keep her locked in one room all the time. Which when she is in there she does great. Purrs, happy to be petted ,wants in your lap, and will greet you when you come in. Out in general population she is miserable and I feel so bad. I had really wanted to keep her and give her her forever home.

But the more I think about it the more I think she would be better off with someone who has no cats or 1 or 2 calmer cats. She has bonded with another stray I brought in. Unfortunately I have another who will just not allow him into this house even after long introductions. So he lives in the basement with my son. My son is allergic to cats so he can't have 2 down there as much as he would like too.

So I have decided for her sake it would be best to try and rehome her to a home more suited for her. She is not spay yet but will be getting spay soon. I just weaned the baby and got the estimate to get all her shots and the spay done. So I can do this before someone takes her or I am willing to pay half of it their choice.

I really like this kitty and feel awful she is not happy here. I wish there was more that I could do to help her but as more time goes on she is regressing worse and worse.

Anyways I am in the state of Mass. I am looking for someone to take her to a forever home. I will even put in a stipulation that if she doesn't work out for you, I will take her back. I really really hate having to do this. She has already had a bad start to life and I really wanted to give her a chance to have a happy home but my kitties are not going to allow it and they were here first.

Our shelters are full and she is on the older edge of young so she would be pts if I took her anywhere other than a no kill. I really would rather do the adoption myself and save her anymore stress.

Any help anyone can give me I would appreciate it.

Thank you

You are right about wanting her to have a loving home. I can feel your distress at having to make this decision. It is not easy. I am in a similar bind with a stray.
Do you have any friends who are cat people? Or someone who would take her in and foster her until you can find a better situation for her?

You could try reintroducing them for a loooong period of time. Like months. Did you get the Feliway plug ins? Have you tried some of the herbal remedies? I use Bach Flower essences and my vet gave me some natural medicine for Mary when she was going crazy about the outside strays and it worked. She still gets irked but she is not stressed out all of the time.
If you feel strongly then a no kill shelter would be best. If she is sweet she may not be there that long. If she is 2 or 3 she still has a good shot. If she were 9 or 10 then it would be more difficult.

Good luck in whatever you decide.

I commend you for helping this cat out.

I can't help but wonder just how much of her behavior can be attributed to the fact that she only recently gave birth (it's natural for mama cats to be on edge) and she hasn't been spayed yet.

Obviously there is absolutely nothing wrong with your decision to look for a different home for her, where she might indeed wind up being happier than she would be in your home. But it would be interesting to see what things would be like if you decided to continue to isolate her, then reintroduce her to the rest of your cats some time after she's been spayed and those hormones leave her system.

Best of luck with whatever decision you make.

I am not sure reintroduction would work. They aren't fighting physically. It is a mental battle that is going on around here. They wont attack her, they stalk her. I believe they stalk her because they know she is scared. Even when they aren't around she is just a nervous wreck. For her to feel safe going to the litter box I have to go with her. When I am not home I have to move one litter box into her safe zone which is my livingroom under the coffee table at my feet. She will also go in the kitchen to eat but those are the only 2 rooms she will go in. The other cats roam the whole house. She has free rein to go anywhere she wants but she wont. She just cowers and growls. Even if I take all of the cats out of the way she will not go out of those 2 rooms.

I am almost positive she was abused by someone. If you pet her and move your hand away from her too fast she will attack you. If you reach at her too fast she attacks. She hasn't bit yet but threatens. She will scratch you and chase you down. But only if you move your hands too fast. Otherwise she loves people she just has a issue with fast moving hands. She cowers and ducks her head even when you reach slowly towards her.

I had her down in the basement with the other stray and she had such a personality change it was incredible. She was a completely different cat. Sweet loving and just played. But as I said earlier my son is allergic to cats. He has a stray down there he claimed as his own and with medication does ok with him. He is a short hair. The female is medium/long haired and she is more than his medication can control. When she is down stairs or if my son handles her he breaks out and his eyes just swell. I have to keep her area vacuumed well too keep him from breaking out upstairs as well.

Thank you for all of your suggestions. I have tried to rehome her with friends, people I work with I have even offered to fly her out to my father who would like a cat. But with her issues she is special needs at this point and really needs to be with someone who has enough patients to work with her and understand the hand movement and mood swings and not get mad at her. I am really hoping the spay helps. I know she is good I have seen it when she was downstairs so that is what leads me to believe she would be better off rehomed with someone who understands her needs.

You might try working with vets in the area to re-home her. They often know of a family that might fit the situation. Another good place to find a match is senior centers. Stressed cats like that often do great in a home where there is and older person. Older people often do not want a kitten and have the time to care and work with a cat with some issues. I have re-homed many cats with that issue to seniors and have not had one come back yet. They are usually so spoiled and are great companions.

Originally Posted by kat89447

You might try working with vets in the area to re-home her. They often know of a family that might fit the situation. Another good place to find a match is senior centers. Stressed cats like that often do great in a home where there is and older person. Older people often do not want a kitten and have the time to care and work with a cat with some issues. I have re-homed many cats with that issue to seniors and have not had one come back yet. They are usually so spoiled and are great companions.

Click to expand...

Yes. That is a great idea. She may need to be an only and some people don't want the work of a kitten. Seniors are great for that.
Keep us posted.