Why do adopters return cats...I am Angry.

mlynn

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I got an email last month from a family who adopted a pair of kittens 3 YEARS ago asking to have them returned. They are male/female possible russian blue/OSH mixes. They were adopted to a single law student...who expressed how pets were a life long commitment.

Fast forward 3 years, she gets married, has a newborn baby, and decides she would rather live in California and BOOM the cats are and I quote "in the way" (coming from her husband who just dropped them off).

What is wrong with people?

Now I have 2 more cats...making a total of 9 with the 3 I own and the 4 kittens I am fostering...in an apartment where my landlord doesn't know the cats are here. I CAN'T have 10 frecking cats and I can't keep taking back cat after cat after cat YEARS after the fact. The adopters WERE screened. I thought they had a forever home. Uggh. The nerve of people....don't want your cat...just dump it back on the rescuer. Putting "take back" clauses in adoption contracts seems like it makes it too easy for adopter's to just dump ALL responsibility at all as pet owners for no reason. It's not fair.
 

white cat lover

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It's not fair, but where would they have been dumped otherwise?

Road ditch?
High kill shelter?
The street?

I'm always upset when fosters/shelter animals come back, but glad we get them rather than them ending up who knows where.
 

cc12

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Originally Posted by white cat lover

It's not fair, but where would they have been dumped otherwise?

Road ditch?
High kill shelter?
The street?

I'm always upset when fosters/shelter animals come back, but glad we get them rather than them ending up who knows where.
Good point. I didn't think of it that way.
 

addiebee

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Originally Posted by white cat lover

It's not fair, but where would they have been dumped otherwise?

Road ditch?
High kill shelter?
The street?

I'm always upset when fosters/shelter animals come back, but glad we get them rather than them ending up who knows where.
Yup, yup, yup!! Our rescue also has a return clause which has been exercised by adoptors in the past.
 
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mlynn

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I think a return clause is a good thing in general....but why does it seem like these people are just "babysitting"....just enjoying the cute little kitten stage for a while...with no long term commitment or accountability. It seems like the "the rescue will always take it back" idea makes dumping animals "easy" for people who SHOULD be responsible for them. They don't have to do any work...or make any hard choices or sacrifices. I have a dog who I have had to revamp my entire life for....so I could keep her...and these people won't even try. These adopters COULD have kept their cats it was just EASIER for them to dump them and let someone else do all the hard work of fostering and finding a new home for them. They wanted to make no exceptions. They just wanted their "burden" gone and away from them. It makes me feel used IMO.

I know the clause is in the contract for a reason and it is for a damn good one...but over the last few years I have had 2 dogs adopted as puppies returned with issues that now make them unadaptable (who I have kept), stray and owned animals abandoned in my back yard because "she will take it", and now I am having adopters return cats after having them for YEARS. It just makes me feel so used...like I should feel ok about having other peoples "burdens" dumped on me when I am already overwhelmed and struggling to pay rent, bills, vet bills, and...oh yeah food. Maybe I don't have a right to feel this way...as the return clause is something I insisted upon....but I do. I just wish there was a way to ensure the pets who really NEED to come back into rescue CAN with out making it an "easy way out" for the adopters who just don't want to be bothered with doing the right thing.

The fact is I am probibally going to end up keeping these cats if they can't be adopted...which is doubtful especially during kitten season. I guess I just feel overwhelmed and under appreciated. Like a means to an end. I am not in a situation right now to keep these cats...it hinders my ability to care for and keep my own cats (my landlord would be less likely to evict me if he found I had 3 cats instead of 9 cats) and jeopardizes their safety....but what choice do I have if they can't be placed? Euthanasia for convince? Not something I would do. I guess I will just have to struggle extra hard to make it work...which troughs my life off balance too. The thing is my landlord is pet friendly....but paranoid about cats or cat rescue or cat fostering. He doesn't mind dogs or me fostering the occasional extra dog (he lets me keep my 4, one being a pit bull mix even because I am a good tenant and the house has been in great and drastically improved condition from the white trash crack house it was since I have been here). The things is his ex-girlfriend used to rescue/hoard cats and they had 13 cats in a tiny apartment in AWFUL conditions. My upstairs neighbors tell me the carpet was so infested with flea's and larva when they moved in that they had to bug bomb 4 times to kill them all and replace all the flooring out of pocket. He is OK with my 4 dogs and is never here. Every time he comes I make sure the house is super clean, spotless, nothing looks "dogafied", or dirty, or drolled on exc...and there is no "pet smells". So he knows the animals aren't a risk to the house...but I don't want him to show up on an off day and come into an apartment with 9 cats. I can see how that would make him loose trust in me and make him more prone to "regulate" my foster work.

I wouldn't feel so upset if there was a real reason for these adopters to re home their cats. I am upset because I was lied to, manipulated, and used as a dumping ground when the cats became less convenient.

They are loosing their home (which I found out they don't own). But only because they didn't renew their lease (because they wanted to move to CA in 3 months) not because of money troubles. Now the landlord wants to get a stable tenant in his rental unit for his own sake (which isin't wrong...what should he have done?) and the adopters didn't plan for this. They said they couldn't bring the cats the place they were staying until they moved. I offered to foster them for 3 months to reunite them with their owners in CA. Then the excuse was "well we have a new baby and the cats still have their claws". I told them about socialization and supervising the cats with baby...not leaving baby's door open for cats to wander in and out as they please exc. Well then it became we want to do this...and that...and the cats are "in the way". It's amazing what lengths a person will go to to make themselves not look like the "bad guy". Jesus...couldn't they just have said...we are sick of taking care of these cats and we don't want them anymore? Geeze at least be honest.
 

jesi

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Im sorry and I understand the situation your in. It would make me angry too. Ive also went to great lengths to keep my dog... even paying insainly high rent because he is my family! I would do anything for my animals bc they are my family and it makes me so mad when people really dont honor the committment they made to these helpless animals! At least they brought them back to you but still.... I know what you mean.
 

mews2much

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Why are they Moving out here. I alot of people come here and think its going to be all great then they hate it here. We had Cats before my Sisters were born. One did attack her but my Manx saved her from getting hurt worse. She would sleep in her bed and protect her.
 

howtoholdacat

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I feel your pain. I run a pet sitting company and am floored at how often people approach me and ask me to help them re-home their pet for (usually) the very weak excuse that, "it just isn't working out." They always have great things to say about the pet but the bottom line is they don't want to be bothered with the responsibility. In TEN years I've only had one request to re-home cats that made sense. The couple's new born was extremely allergic to their two cats and was in danger of losing his life. That's the only one that seemed reasonable to me. When I get the unreasonable requests I always think, "Man, I'm glad I'm not your kid!" A friend once sent me a hilarious email about how a couple had two kids but their agility trainer called and they were finally getting an agility dog and since they would be so busy with the dog they needed new homes for their kids. I looked for a copy of it but couldn't find it. Maybe someone else knows of it. While it doesn't solve your problem of the returning cats it is very funny and made me feel better about all the times I've been hit up for help. Maybe it would give you a laugh too!
 

cc12

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I have been sneaky with my cats too because so many people have misconceptions about cats. Here where I live you get different kinds of landlords. You get ones that say dogs only, ones that allow pets up to a size but more cat onlys. The ones that are nice are harder to come by. I knew I was the kind of person who is responsible and I chose to stay out of the way. I called people to fix stuff and paid myself. There was no way on earth I was going to be separated from my babies.
People are strange. They have a pet but consider it a toy and then they are done with it.

I would try to get food samples from independently owned pet stores to help defray some of the cost.

3 years is really ridiculous.
 

kat89447

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There are people that see their pets as family, and those that see them as a possesion or status. The second I feel sorry for. I am glad that they brought them back to you, the alternative is worse. It's amazing how many pets have been left to die in houses that went into forclosure lately. It makes me sick.

If they are social enough, finding them a home should be easy. Since they are older they might be a perfect match for an older person. Older people don't usually want kittens and older cats get tons of attention from them.

Your local vet or shelter might be able to help you find a new home for them. Vets are my favorite resource because the usually can find homes of people that recently lost a loved pet, or looking to add to their family.They already have experience, and understand what they are taking on. Plus, if they get matched up by the vet, then you know they care enough to see that the cats would get proper health care. Good luck
 

morning

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> They were adopted to a single law student...who expressed how pets were a life long commitment.

> Fast forward 3 years, she gets married, has a newborn baby, and decides she would rather live in California and BOOM the cats are and I quote "in the way" (coming from her husband who just dropped them off).

Well, if people can afford all that -- she must be a lawyer now -- can't they afford a sizeable fee to place the cats back with you?

I agree: what is wrong with people?
 

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I worry that it is actually the husband who is returning the cats - he claims that she feels "they're in the way", but he is probably pressuring her to get rid of them. IMO, the cats are going to be better off with you, but how awful for you to be overburdened this way. Sending prayers and vibes that you find a much better home for the cats, and also protection vibes for the baby of a family that can so easily throw out (and probably ignore & neglect, at least emotionally) a family member
 

cc12

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Originally Posted by catsknowme

I worry that it is actually the husband who is returning the cats - he claims that she feels "they're in the way", but he is probably pressuring her to get rid of them. IMO, the cats are going to be better off with you, but how awful for you to be overburdened this way. Sending prayers and vibes that you find a much better home for the cats, and also protection vibes for the baby of a family that can so easily throw out (and probably ignore & neglect, at least emotionally) a family member
I was thinking the same thing.
 
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