Cat misses his brother

Sadly, we lost our cross burman/tabby darling Toby to
FIP 3 weeks ago, our other cat is pining for him. He
keeps sitting in Tobys places and miaowing, he keeps
walking round the room and sniffing and looking for
him. He used to sleep all day but now he is downstairs
and about all the time, they were together from kittens
and we have no other pets. He is 15, he was always the
dominant of the two cats and I thought he would cope
but he is still looking for him. Has anyone any idea
of how we can make him happier or how long it takes
before he will accept the situation?

Christine

just talking to him and letting him know the other kitty is no longer in pain. That he has gone to the rainbow bridge and he will see him again. Tell him you love him and are there for him and everything will turn out OK.
It will take a while for him to settle down. He is greiving too.
I am very sorry for your loss and will keep you in my thoughts.

When my sweet Shredder died, his brother Kabota was beside himself and wouldn't be comforted. I have had the privilege of meeting some wonderful folk through my association with Meowhoo, and one of them is an animal communicator. I was sharing with her in an email about Kabota's grief and she told me to wait until he was on my lap and then turn him around to face me, ask him if I could talk to him, and then if he didn't turn away, or jump off- just tell him how it went, how I miss Shredder etc..

So at the next opportunity, I did just that. Kabota was crying and I was outside, so I sat down on the picnic table, called to him and he came and jumped on my lap. I turned him around to face me, asked him quietly if I could talk to him, and he settled down and looked at me. I just dumped on him, told him everything and how much I missed his brother. He was strangely quiet and when I was finished- he head bumped me, wrapped his paws around me and snuggled to my chest. The very next day, he stopped searching for Shredder, and stopped crying. I told him that Shredder died upstairs,in the cat room, on my chest, and to this day, even when he is inside the house, he will not go into the room that his brother died in.

Stacie, the animal communicator said it is important that you ask their permission to talk to them, and tell them all. You may think it is nonsense, but I am just telling you that it works.

Hissy...that just gave me chills!

Thank you all for your advice. I did talk to him last
night, I asked his permission and he stopped and
stared at me. When I had finished, he washed and
settled down. Unfortunately, today, he is going around
the house miaowing again. It could be that I cooked
something this morning that Toby always was scrounging
for, it upset me and my other cat, not a good idea.

Christine

About 1 1/2 years ago we had our cat, Midnight, put to sleep at home, and had the vet take the body away to be privately cremeated(sp?). Snowball and I were with Midnight when the injection was given, and my son and I talked to Snowball that same day and told him that Midnight was gone and could never come back because she had died. He did seem to understand what had happened because he never really looked for Midnight and he seemed sad and very lonely for awhile. Also, he didn't have any interest in playing for several weeks, and needed a lot of extra cuddling from us. It took some time, but he eventually adjusted to being the only cat.

I think it would help to give your cat extra attention and reassurance if he seems to need it. When Midnight died, the vet said our loss was also Snowball's loss, and that he would go through a period of grieving similiar to ours. I'm not sure about this, but I think the time it takes to adjust might depend on the individual animal.