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It's already been a year (extremely long-don't read if prone to tears)

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 
EDIT:This has all poured out, please don't get annoyed at me, i really needed to let it all out.

This day, a year ago i came home from doing some shopping. I saw you running around the nature strip and when i finally reached you, i picked you up and gave you a cuddle and walked over the road with you, only one house away from where we lived. Of course you were in such a playful mood that you didn't want any cuddles, so you squirmed your way out of my arms, and ran back across the road. You ran under the car to avoid the back tyres, instead of running behind it. It was a snap judgment. There was a little thump, I would've sworn it only clipped your foot or leg. You ran off into the neighbours yard. I freaked out and the woman who hurt you came back, parked and helped me find you.

You were laying in the yard, you only had enough energy to sprint over the fence. You looked like you were sleeping, absolutely perfect, with your paws laid out like the sphinx, your chin resting on your legs. You had no injuries, no blood. Dad so cruelly puts it that from the stress, your heart may have just burst right there. But i picked you up and you were limp. I cried and screamed carrying you back home as fast as i could, but it felt slow. I couldn't hold you up in my arms properly. The woman had my bag and keys, the house was locked like a fortress and she opened it for me. I saw on the couch with you on my lap. Dad was home, but tinkering in the garage with his earmuffs on. it was so frustrating trying to call out to him. She gets him inside and he sees you.

I can't believe it's real. Your eyes are open the whole hour and a half i sit there, i think you were gone when you jumped over the fence, but you look like you're staring at me the whole time. This woman is truly sorry and she keeps saying god has a plan for her. When she reveals she is a white witch, but believes in god, i get so angry at her for saying what she's saying. she says she will come and see how we are in a few weeks or so. it was 8 months before we moved house, i never saw her again. Mum wasn't going to be home for another 5 hours, so we didn't tell her till she got home. We put you into the pet carrier, with the top off, put a towel around you and let you sit up on the porch so you could watch the sun set. Charlie didn't understand. He sniffed you a little bit and said hello. That was the last day we allowed him any freedom outside.

The clay was so hard. Dad chose to put you out in the backyard where it was soft, but mum and i wanted you close to the house, so we spent a couple of hours taking turns, digging as deep as we could, and saying our goodbyes. Everyday we picked fresh flowers from the garden and put them where you lay. After a while we didn't do it as much, but to this day i never stop thinking about you. I bought a little cat statue to put on your grave. When my parents decided to sell up, i freaked out, because i didn't want to leave you there. My father just calls you a shell of a body, and your souls somewhere else. But to me, it isn't that simple. When we moved 3 months ago, i put your statue outside, near my bedroom window. I hope that some of your spirit came with it.

We adopted you at only 9 weeks old. Mum and i were at the RSPCA, and in this one room, we were surrounded by about 6 calico kittens, all with different spirit. But you were the one who kept coming up to me and chewing on the string hanging from my pants. You were definitely it. As i had Charlie, you were mums cat, but i gave you your name, mum really thought it suited. When we travelled back home, you didn't utter a sound, we were worried. After a day or two, we realised you had cat flu, we took you back, got your medication and at home when you finally got better, you were so vocal.

I can't really remember what Charlie thought of you at first. He had been on his own for a couple of years since our old Klingon had passed away. I do remember that you didn't get along with each other. You were the loud, dominant female, and Charlie lay down and submitted, he was always like that since he was adopted. You'd sometimes get into fights with each other, and the neighbourhood cats. When you passed on, Charlie went into a depression. The vet said you were his protector, that your smell was around the backyard to ward off other cats, and he no longer had a friend to defend him. We thought because you didn't get along, that that wasn't possible. He went on medication for a month of two, and after a while, he came out of his shell. It isn't a blessing that you're gone, but it is a blessing that Charlie has now taken on some of your cheeky and very vocal characteristics, that he didn't have beforehand.

We only had you for just over 2 years, you i think made the most impact on us out of other kitties we've had even though i've loved them all. When we adopted you we knew you had Marmalades bright eyes, and Klingons shape, and many other characteristics from past cats, you were new, and somehow very familiar. I miss you very much. I dont think my parents even remember that today is the day, they probably dont want reminding. But i remember you every day, i cry alot still. I miss your crazyness and that beautiful face. Charlie does that funny thing now where you used to flip underneath the couch and slide down one end and back on your back, it's so cute. I have never stopped blaming myself for your death, even though i was angry at that woman, you would have been ok had i not wanted to stop for a cuddle. I'm so sorry you aren't here with us, please forgive me. I hope that wherever you are, that you are happy and playing with the other siblings who never got to meet you.

~~~In memory of Jasmine
Rest in peace
January 2005 - May 9 2007~~~

post #2 of 13
I'm so sorry for your loss hon
post #3 of 13
That was definetly a touching tribute to Jasmine, she was so beautiful, I had the same thing happen with one of my little girls, LaLa, she was hit by a car just outside, she ran in another yard and just cried for me to go get her. I did get her, tragically, she had severe internal bleeding, and we had to get her put down. Thats a very very tragic thing that happened, and it hurts to lose special things that matter a lot.

Your words brought tears to my eyes,

Rest in peace Jasmine,

post #4 of 13
Of course no one is going to be annoyed at you

I can remember how upset you were when it happened but please don`t blame yourself. It was a terrible accident, you weren`t to blame.

Watch over your mummy Jasmine
post #5 of 13
Many for you today, Emma.
post #6 of 13
condolences on your sad loss of Jasmine. these anniversaries are difficult, I know, as are the holidays that pass, and with each passing year, the sad truth that they are really gone for good, at least, until we get to go join them, over RB, reunited forever.
post #7 of 13
Thread Starter 
Thanks for your replies. I'm so glad that i was a part of this forum when it happened. You are all so kind and supportive. It's nice to be part of a group of people who have this one big thing that links us all. Time has gone by so quickly, i can't believe it.
post #8 of 13
I am so so sorry and yes I shed a tear. It helps to talk about it.
post #9 of 13
Jasmine is a very pretty girl.
Rest in peace little one.
post #10 of 13
your tribute to jasmine was beautiful.

i lost thomas a similar way. was in my bedroom, heard a screech of tyres and when i looked out i saw thomas running onto a driveway across the road.

i thought he'd had a lucky escape too but when he didn't come home i started fearing the worst.

the following day i discovered that he had been found curled up, dead, under the car he'd been running to. i had had my boy for 9 months. that was 7 years ago.

for you. we never stop loving and missing our babies.

play happily across the bridge sweet jasmine.
post #11 of 13
My friend,... Don´t give up,.. I´m so sure Jasmine is looking for you someday!...

Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take

I'll be watching you

Every single day
Every word you say
Every game you play
Every night you stay

I'll be watching you

In loving memmorie of her!
post #12 of 13
What a lovely tribute to your girl. Rest in peace Jasmine.
post #13 of 13
Thank you for sharing your beautiful tribute to Jasmine.

I know how much you miss her, but she will always be with you.

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