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How to get the cat to cuddle more?

post #1 of 9
Thread Starter 
I adopted a cat 3 months ago (male, adult, aged 4, neutered 5 months ago). He's somewhat friendly towards me and my family, but he won't let me pick him up, won't sit on anyone's lap or sit on the same couch, won't let me brush him, and won't let me touch his tommy. When I brush him, sometimes he will bite and scratch.
The shelter has no info on his history, but do you think he's been abused to his prior home?
post #2 of 9
hehe...you have a typical cat on your hands. I have 7 cats and only 2 will let me scratch their bellies. Most cats do not like belly scratches like dogs. One of my cats absolutely does not like to be picked up. And none of them are crazy about being brushed. A few are lap cats, but not most. I would not say he was abused at all in a former home. He sounds like a totally normal cat to me.
post #3 of 9
It's funny; they'll even change after you think you've figured them out.

Punkin doesn't like to be picked up any more, but at one time he did. And the funny thing is, if you pick him up, he'll struggle to get down, but purr the whole time.

Sterling wants to be on someone's lap (preferably Dottie's) when we're sitting there, but try to pick him up when he's not in the mood, and he can be off like a shot and play tag the rest of the morning. But he wants to cuddle up to Dottie at night, too.

There is just no figuring out what's going on in those little peanut brains.
post #4 of 9
Thread Starter 
if I pick up my cat, he will struggle to get down while trying to scratch me with his hinge legs. Maybe the cat is annoyed by my petting, should I leave him alone for a while, w/o paying any attention to him or should I still try to pet him?
post #5 of 9
He still isn't fully settled. Some cats aren't lap cats. Some will take months to get used to a new home & relax. It's possible he was a stray outdoor cat, that doesn't know what it's like to be petted/be a lap cat.
post #6 of 9
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by white cat lover View Post
He still isn't fully settled. Some cats aren't lap cats. Some will take months to get used to a new home & relax. It's possible he was a stray outdoor cat, that doesn't know what it's like to be petted/be a lap cat.
Since he wasn't neuterred until recently, I suspect he used to spent a least part of his time outdoor. He probably wasn't a stray though, he's not really afraid of people or nervous around the house.
post #7 of 9
Last May I adopted George from the Humane Society (he was 5 yrs old at the time). You can see the progress he's made over the months to feel more comfortable in his new home. George will let you pick him up, but the moment you sit down he jumps out of your arms. He hates his tummy and feet being touched. He goes in spurts sleeping in bed at night or sleeping on the back of the chair. He likes to cuddle but only on his terms...he is in no way a lap cat. George is quite a character and I'm very happy to have found him. Your new buddy is probably just getting use to his new surroundings - it just might take some time.
post #8 of 9
My cat is just over a year old. She loves to sit on laps. It doesn't matter who it is. I did read where cats don't like their stomachs to be touched. Mine doesn't care either way.

The only problem with my cat is that she doesn't want to have someone pet her all of the time, or she'll turn around and act like she's going to bite you. She doesn't ever bite, it's more like a threat. She'd rather just lay on your lap and that's it basically.

I'm not sure why she's like this. In fact, she'll cuddle as though she's a baby or something. It's really strange, but sweet in a weird way lol. Not to sure what to tell you except that it's probably personality of the cat more than anything else.
post #9 of 9
I have a cat who didn't even want to be touched for the first year I had her (I adopted her as a kitten who came out from under a house with her mother and siblings, and obviously none of the kittens had been touched by humans early in life), liked to be touched but stayed away from my body for the next year, and now she's about the most insistent lap cat I've ever met. Another cat I had in my life never was a lap cat, until about the last year and a half of her life.

Cats can change, and some just aren't lap cats. Since your cat is willing to have you touch him, I don't have any particular strategies to get convince him that your lap is a great place to be. Patience sometimes works, though.
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