Dilemma-NEED opinions !
Long post ! But I'm sobbing ( and rambling ! ) as I type, so please bare with me - I need your opinions !
Last year in June and July, I fought so hard to save the life of a pony, who I knew for many years, and as the owner refused to pay livery costs, the retirement place in Wales wanted to shoot her.
With the help of Chev from here, who I met on this board, I was put in touch with the Veteran Horse Society ( my pony's 25 now ), and the pony was signed over to me, and she was saved. It turned out to be a bit of a rescue and she was retreived in a bit of a bad way. At the time. I was suffering from chronic depression, and the fight for my pony pulled me back on the road. I feel I owe my pony my life.
Anyway, much to my delight - it was like a miracle - my pony was rehomed on Permanent Loan, only 20 minutes away to a lovely family of all adults, who's life's ambition was to own a pony of her breed. They love her to bits, and they have done so very much for her, she looks fantastic, and is clearly healthy and happy. They are really nice people and I get on very well with them.
Now the dilemma. Before she was rescued, in a space of a year, she had 9 different loaners, and several different homes. When I agreed to rehome her to this family, who I get on very well with, I really thought this would be her last home - and her home for life. They gave me no impression that they would ever leave.
My world and my pony's were more or less perfect, and I dreamed of watching her spend the rest of her life, in that very same place.
Then last night, my bubble was burst. Less than 7 months on, I am faced with a decison. The family want to move - they were badly flooded out in January and cannot take that again. They want to take my pony with them - they've already made transportation cost enquiries, so by the Autumn they will have gone. I haven't stopped crying. I don't know what to do for the best.
For the last 7 months, I have seen my pony daily, even if just from across the field, - I didn't visit every week, because I didn't want to invade or interfere, even though I long to hug her and groom her every day. By pure chance, I now even work in a mail order company next to her field. I yell goodnight to her every night when I drive by her field, and I took it for granted that that is just where she'd be all her life. She is my pride, and joy and daily pick-me-up. I can't imagine not seeing her so often. I've been with her for the past 13 years. Even got a job on her yard to be with her, to make sure she was loved, and looked after, until she was sent to that awful 'retirement' place in Wales.
I was the only stable thing in her life.
I love her soooo very much, but am not in a position to look after her myself, physically and financially - hence the permanent loan. If they take her with them, I'll be lucky if I see her more than twice a year, inspite of promises of photos, and camcorder footage. She'd be two and a half hours away drive, and ferry ride away, and the ferry is very expensive.
If I find her a home closer to me, and they leave, I can still make sure she is ok. I save my own heart from breaking...probably - but break their whole family's - they do love her to bits - and her field/stable mate, their 40 (?) year old horse's, heart. If I let them take her, I lose her on all but paper, and not see her more than a couple of times a year. And what also fills me with terror - even if it's irrational, because no one ever knows when - is that when her time comes, I doubt I'll have the opportunity to say goodbye.
So what would you do ??? Break a whole family's heart, or break your own ??? Please help !
Thanks for reading all this.
Peace, Love, and Happiness, Always
Sonia
Long post ! But I'm sobbing ( and rambling ! ) as I type, so please bare with me - I need your opinions !
Last year in June and July, I fought so hard to save the life of a pony, who I knew for many years, and as the owner refused to pay livery costs, the retirement place in Wales wanted to shoot her.
With the help of Chev from here, who I met on this board, I was put in touch with the Veteran Horse Society ( my pony's 25 now ), and the pony was signed over to me, and she was saved. It turned out to be a bit of a rescue and she was retreived in a bit of a bad way. At the time. I was suffering from chronic depression, and the fight for my pony pulled me back on the road. I feel I owe my pony my life.
Anyway, much to my delight - it was like a miracle - my pony was rehomed on Permanent Loan, only 20 minutes away to a lovely family of all adults, who's life's ambition was to own a pony of her breed. They love her to bits, and they have done so very much for her, she looks fantastic, and is clearly healthy and happy. They are really nice people and I get on very well with them.
Now the dilemma. Before she was rescued, in a space of a year, she had 9 different loaners, and several different homes. When I agreed to rehome her to this family, who I get on very well with, I really thought this would be her last home - and her home for life. They gave me no impression that they would ever leave.
My world and my pony's were more or less perfect, and I dreamed of watching her spend the rest of her life, in that very same place.
Then last night, my bubble was burst. Less than 7 months on, I am faced with a decison. The family want to move - they were badly flooded out in January and cannot take that again. They want to take my pony with them - they've already made transportation cost enquiries, so by the Autumn they will have gone. I haven't stopped crying. I don't know what to do for the best.
For the last 7 months, I have seen my pony daily, even if just from across the field, - I didn't visit every week, because I didn't want to invade or interfere, even though I long to hug her and groom her every day. By pure chance, I now even work in a mail order company next to her field. I yell goodnight to her every night when I drive by her field, and I took it for granted that that is just where she'd be all her life. She is my pride, and joy and daily pick-me-up. I can't imagine not seeing her so often. I've been with her for the past 13 years. Even got a job on her yard to be with her, to make sure she was loved, and looked after, until she was sent to that awful 'retirement' place in Wales.
I was the only stable thing in her life.
I love her soooo very much, but am not in a position to look after her myself, physically and financially - hence the permanent loan. If they take her with them, I'll be lucky if I see her more than twice a year, inspite of promises of photos, and camcorder footage. She'd be two and a half hours away drive, and ferry ride away, and the ferry is very expensive.
If I find her a home closer to me, and they leave, I can still make sure she is ok. I save my own heart from breaking...probably - but break their whole family's - they do love her to bits - and her field/stable mate, their 40 (?) year old horse's, heart. If I let them take her, I lose her on all but paper, and not see her more than a couple of times a year. And what also fills me with terror - even if it's irrational, because no one ever knows when - is that when her time comes, I doubt I'll have the opportunity to say goodbye.
So what would you do ??? Break a whole family's heart, or break your own ??? Please help !
Thanks for reading all this.
Peace, Love, and Happiness, Always
Sonia