What to do?? A company WANTS me?!

pamela

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I know I haven't been online much lately but things have been sooo hectic for me lately.

Let me try to summarize what's going on. I have such MIXED feelings about what's going on and just need to put this down and see what you guys think.. First, this is NOT the first time that another company/employer have tried to entice me away from where I'm currently working BUT this is the FIRST TIME I'M SERIOUSLY CONSIDERING IT.

It IS FLATTERING to know that people WANTS me to work for them BUT at the same time it's causing me MORE STRESS and I just don't know what to do!!

About a month ago, this company contacted me about having me be in a short clip on their website and I was interviewed over the video phone for this. To my surprise, one of the interviewers was a long lost good friend of mine who is now the director of PR/marketing for that company.

After working with them on this video clip, I received an email from this friend/director (Let's call him Jack) putting "feelers" out about an unofficial job position (Jack added a line at the end saying "Want to move back home for this?" kinda joking I thought) and I replied saying I'd see if I could find any qualified candidates for him (I work with employers to set up interviews, etc).

At that time I got real busy coordinating a big job fair so I didn't reply to another email from Jack following up on this. He called me up and when I apologized and promised I'd see if I could find some candidates after the fair, he looked at me and said "Pamela, remember I asked if you wanted to move back home? I was NOT joking.. We are interested in YOU for this. We have heard so much about you and everyone recommended you highly to us. Will YOU consider this opportunity?? I even spoke to our Vice President of Marketing about YOU and she's interested in meeting you."

I about fell out of my chair- I guess I was just so stressed and focused on the fair that I didn't see this coming. I told Jack I was open to opportunities BUT that I couldn't discuss it at that time since I was very busy with the fair and asked if we could discuss it further after the fair which was last week. He agreed and asked me to email him my resume and my salary range.

Exactly TWO DAYS after the fair, Jack emailed me to follow up so I emailed him my resume and salary range. Sunday, he emailed me and said he wanted to fly me out to interview me ASAP at their expense.

I wasn't expecting this to be happening so FAST! I agreed and I will be flying out Sunday evening and be interviewed on Monday then fly back Mon night.

I started getting more mixed feelings about the whole thing so I called a good friend of mine (let's call him Tim) who works at that company but in a different department and asked him what he thought. He gave me some good information about the company then when I mentioned that Jane (Vice President of Marketing) will be interviewing me with Jack, Tim said "Pamela, the job's obviously yours!" Tim explained when Jack wants something, he goes after it and it's OBVIOUS that Jack wants me to work for them ESPECIALLY since Jack has gotten Jane involved in the interview process. Normally, Jack will just interview the candidate with a few of his people under him and it's RARE that Jane would be involved. Tim said it's pretty obvious that I will have the job and the interview is just a formality. I about pulled my hair out when he said that because that made me start thinking about all the logistics (moving cross country from Maryland to Utah with six cats, how to tell my boss, how to wrap things up at work, etc). I did NOT want to hear this!


Jack called me today to give me more details and I was informed that I will also meet with the CEO of the company!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I about died inside when he mentioned that!! I DID not need more pressure!! I asked if that was normal for the CEO to be involved with the interviewing process. Jack said in the beginning when the CEO was setting up the company over 10-15 years ago, he was involved with the interviewing process but since the company has grown so much and now there are thousands of people working for him, he has stopped that a long time ago. He does like to keep in the loop with the PR department, apparently heard about me and wants to meet and chat for a while. I am very flattered and excited about this but at the same time I am SCARED AND TERRIFIED AND .......... Tim about FLIPPED out when I called him later and told him about the CEO wanting to meet me. He said that was extremely rare.

I mean, part of me would be thrilled to move back home and be near my family finally along with childhood friends. Part of me is terrified to leave my current job cuz I LOVE the job. I do not have many close friends here (most of my close friends are out west). There's really nothing holding me here except my job to be honest. I'm scared that if I do get this job and I move back that I'd regret it and will not be able to get my current job back. (There are not many jobs like what I have now). I also am feeling guilty about thinking about leaving my co workers- we have been through so much, we've fought to get more staff and now are FINALLY getting more positions so we can hire people. I am also one of the KEY people in my department. I HATE to say this but I KNOW if I leave, it'll be TOUGH for the department since I do so much for the department. My wonderful boss keep telling me how amazing I am and that he couldn't do without me. At the recent fair, he was talking with some employers and when they complimented him on everything related to the fair, he pointed to me and said "Pamela did it all. She deserves all the credit." I told him that was not true and that I couldn't have done it without him or the team. At that point, he said "Pamela, you did 95% of the work and it was amazing."

I recently spoke with a friend of mine about this and she knows a co worker of mine and she said "Oh boy, from what I've heard from your co worker, your department will really struggle without you since you do so much and you are pivotal to your department." That really hit me hard because this co worker does not give out compliments lightly and she has never really complimented me to my face about work. I told her that everyone CAN be replaced and that maybe someone better qualified will replace me... Who knows?

My current boss is a WONDERFUL BOSS and I feel guilty for thinking of leaving this job if I do get this job offer. I LOVE my job but I do have to admit that it is getting OLD that I have to bring work home to catch up on often, that I have to stay at work LATE often and I have a hard time taking a few days off because I keep thinking of work that need to be done.

I am also TERRIFIED that I will not be happy living in Utah because of the environment there. (People there are OBSESSED with marriage and I am HAPPILY SINGLE). I am TERRIFIED that I will feel more LEFT OUT with my family if I'm there with them (long and complex story that I won't go into!).

Am I wrong for feeling this way? Has any of you gone through something like this? If so, how do you handle all the mixed feelings and making a TOUGH decision like this??

Any advice is greatly appreciated!!! I'm so sorry this is so long!! Thank you for your patience if you've read down this far!
 

mrblanche

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I think you should go and interview. If you don't, you'll kick yourself if something changes at your current job and you've burned this bridge.

Then, if you like the offer and it's significantly better than what you have, you might give your current boss the opportunity to match it. This carries the inherent danger that he might hold it over your head, expecting you to do a lot more than you're currently doing.

Living costs are lower in Utah, depending on where you are. And while the LDS church has a lot of influence there, you'll find that more and more Utah is pretty much in the U.S. mainstream.

Sometimes, however, in order to grow in your work you have to move. This was something I learned the hard way; don't be afraid to change, if it gives you the chance to grow.
 

lunasmom

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Sounds like a lot is happening really fast for you. Number one are you looking to leave? Are they willing to offer you at least 10% more than what you're making now. If it's less, will they pay for your entire move?

How are the benefits? Do they offer a 401k WITH company match...how do their medical benefits compare that what you have now? Living expenses - are they higher or lower? If higher, will you be able to make your bills without sacrificing what you have now?

IF this is an opportunity that YOU WANT to take on go for it. Never feel "guilty" about leaving somewhere. Hate to say this, but really, your department will survive without you if you decide to go. You say that you want to stay a single person, then you have to take care of YOURSELF, not someone else or a department. It's all about careers and moving on/up in the world.

Good luck in your decision though and keep us posted!
 

theimp98

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i think both the answers you got, are about everything i would think of. SO good luck


and yes i would at least go and check it out.
 

kluchetta

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If your current boss is a good boss...he will understand that people move along, change, and grow. He will be sorry to lose you, but he will either understand, or do something to make you stay.
 

catsknowme

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Originally Posted by kluchetta

If your current boss is a good boss...he will understand that people move along, change, and grow. He will be sorry to lose you, but he will either understand, or do something to make you stay.
Such opportunities are so rare, you should definitely give it serious consideration. Aside from the job aspect, are there other ties that would hold you in Maryland - such as helping with TNR or being a mentor to schoolchildren??? Those are other considerations to keep in mind; but on the other hand, there may be some kitties in UT that really need your help!! Ah, decisions, decisions.....
 
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pamela

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Originally Posted by mrblanche

I think you should go and interview. If you don't, you'll kick yourself if something changes at your current job and you've burned this bridge.

Then, if you like the offer and it's significantly better than what you have, you might give your current boss the opportunity to match it. This carries the inherent danger that he might hold it over your head, expecting you to do a lot more than you're currently doing.

Living costs are lower in Utah, depending on where you are. And while the LDS church has a lot of influence there, you'll find that more and more Utah is pretty much in the U.S. mainstream.

Sometimes, however, in order to grow in your work you have to move. This was something I learned the hard way; don't be afraid to change, if it gives you the chance to grow.
Yes, I DO plan to go and be interviewed- I'll be flying out Sun evening, be interviewed and meet some staff from the marketing department Mon then fly back Mon nite.

Unfortunately, my boss does not have the authority to increase my salary or offer other incentitives. He can PROPOSE to increase my salary or add other incentitives but it's the administration above him that has the final say and they are very very "tight fisted". Everyone got ONE to TWO PERCENT increase in pay last year and the administration kept saying how LUCKY we were to GET that MUCH.


I'm LDS and grew up in Utah but haven't lived there for over 10 years so I'm hoping that things have changed since then regarding marriage.
I remember often at various parties, events, etc, one of the first questions a lot of people would ask would be "have a boyfriend? Find anyone? Married yet??" When they find out I am not in a relationship, they often would "pat me on the head", tell me to have hope, and not to give up. That made me feel like my life was no good since I was not in a romantic relationship. I HATED that feeling. Out here on the East Coast, LDS people do not obsess about marriage like that. They don't see it as a big deal that I'm still not married.

I do agree about getting out of my comfort zone if I want to grow.

Originally Posted by lunasmom

Sounds like a lot is happening really fast for you. Number one are you looking to leave? Are they willing to offer you at least 10% more than what you're making now. If it's less, will they pay for your entire move?

How are the benefits? Do they offer a 401k WITH company match...how do their medical benefits compare that what you have now? Living expenses - are they higher or lower? If higher, will you be able to make your bills without sacrificing what you have now?

IF this is an opportunity that YOU WANT to take on go for it. Never feel "guilty" about leaving somewhere. Hate to say this, but really, your department will survive without you if you decide to go. You say that you want to stay a single person, then you have to take care of YOURSELF, not someone else or a department. It's all about careers and moving on/up in the world.

Good luck in your decision though and keep us posted!
You've asked some great questions I haven't thought of yet. *This is WHY I wanted to post this thread - to get input since this is happening so fast and I have not had a chance to really sit down and think things through yet. *

I have NOT been looking to LEAVE my job but how often will this kind of opportunity fall in my lap? The job description sounds like it's written for me literally.

I do plan to ask if they will cover moving expenses *I will ask only AFTER they offer a job (IF they DO!)*. I also plan to negotiateabout the salary and try to go as high as I can without pushing my luck.


The benefits are excellent - I have many friends who works there and I have NEVER heard a complaint about the benefits. I've only heard a FEW complaints about the company from the employees so that shows that the company takes good care of their employees IMO.

Yes, I know my current department will survive without me (like I said in my previous post, I know everyone can be replaced in the workplace) but my fear is how long will they struggle before someone is hired to replace me? Like I mentioned before, we had to fight a couple years just to add TWO positions and we are still very short staffed.

I do enjoy being single but if I do ever meet a guy out there who can handle a crazy cat woman with 6 furbabies that loves me and I love him, I'd be happy to marry him. I just have not met a guy that meets the criterias mentionend above.
I'm always "starcrossed" - meaning I'd be in love with the guy and he'd be in love with my best friend OR HE'd be in love with me but I am NOT interested in HIM.


Originally Posted by theimp98

i think both the answers you got, are about everything i would think of. SO good luck


and yes i would at least go and check it out.
Yes, I plan to go and check it out. THANKS for wishing me good luck. I appreciate it.

Originally Posted by kluchetta

If your current boss is a good boss...he will understand that people move along, change, and grow. He will be sorry to lose you, but he will either understand, or do something to make you stay.
He IS a GREAT boss- very supportive and understanding. He'd WANT to negotiate with me to get me to stay but he cannot go above the administration and offer me incentitives.
 
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pamela

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Originally Posted by catsknowme

Such opportunities are so rare, you should definitely give it serious consideration. Aside from the job aspect, are there other ties that would hold you in Maryland - such as helping with TNR or being a mentor to schoolchildren??? Those are other considerations to keep in mind; but on the other hand, there may be some kitties in UT that really need your help!! Ah, decisions, decisions.....
HMMMM.. I used to help out with TNR but had to quit a couple years ago. Being a mentor to kids- they'd be lucky if I didn't drive them nuts!
I don't have a lot of patience for kids generally.
 
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pamela

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one question I'd like to ask you guys- I'm trying to decide if I should warn my boss in advance about this opportunity OR WAIT until I get a job offer (if that happens)?

Pros of warning- help prepare him for the possibility of losing me
Cons- I don't want him worrying/stressing over nothing- I mean what if they do NOT offer me the job? Then that'd mean he was worrying/stressing over nothing...


What do u guys think??
 

strange_wings

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It sounds like your friend has really pushed to help get you this far, and if the CEO wants to meet you that can't be bad, right? (just stressful as you said)

Can you talk to your current boss freely and inform him of the situation? If not, I think I'd wait... but I'm the type who likes to have pieces falling into place before I make a big jump.

That's also a big move, with 6 pets.
But if you could get a bigger home you could get more cats! or help foster if you have time. Overall it sounds like a great opportunity. Do you really want to stay with the security you have and always be asking yourself why you didn't take the chance to do more?

As for the marriage part, people do that. Maybe it makes them feel better to bother you about it because they jumped into that sort of situation while you're still "free".

Just point out that you're a successful single and independent woman - you're still free to make your choices on your own and you don't have to share with anyone!
 

kluchetta

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Originally Posted by Pamela

one question I'd like to ask you guys- I'm trying to decide if I should warn my boss in advance about this opportunity OR WAIT until I get a job offer (if that happens)?

Pros of warning- help prepare him for the possibility of losing me
Cons- I don't want him worrying/stressing over nothing- I mean what if they do NOT offer me the job? Then that'd mean he was worrying/stressing over nothing...


What do u guys think??
I think I would level with him...
 

kiwideus

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I am a firm believer in everything happening for a reason.

I say go for it. I was asked to interview for a position that I didn't apply for and I thought I would go for it. Now I am much happier. But part of me is sad for certain reasons but I know that it was meant to be.
 

lillekat

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Go for it hun!! I think you need to close your eyes and take a leap of faith every once in a while - and who knows, this could be an opportunity you can't pass up! you're not going to know for certain until you sit that interview though. Maybe they'll make you an offer you can't resist......
 
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pamela

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Just a quick update and to THANK all of you who have shared advice or wished me good luck.

I spoke with my boss about this and he was WONDERFUL about it. He's very supportive and told me he was not surprised that they were trying to "steal me away". He even told me to take tmr afternoon off early if needed to prepare for this interview (I already scheduled Friday off).

He's awesome.


Now, I just have to work on updating my portfolio, do more research on the company, come up with some good questions and be ready.


Will keep you posted if you'd like.

Again, thanks for your support and input!
 

lunasmom

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Originally Posted by Pamela

I do plan to ask if they will cover moving expenses *I will ask only AFTER they offer a job (IF they DO!)*.
I would negotiate it in while you're negotiating salary. If they offer they job, then you ask for them to cover moving, its much easier for them to say "no".
 
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