Did I really overreact? (sorry, kinda long)

calicoprincess

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On Wednesday a friend was over here, a friend of a friend really, I had only been talking to her for a month or so. She was however fully aware of all of my animals before she came over. Anyone who knows me, knows about my animals, there are pictures of all of them on my cell that I am constantly showing people. Anyway, she had been here for about an hour I would say, and I didn't really like how she was treating my cats. I guess it wasn't really how she was treating them at that point, more how she was talking about them, like they are property which I really don't like. Well that and about how dumb cats are (she's a dog lover, which is great, I grew up with dogs, but I love all animals, not just dogs). Mercury is very friendly, so he came up to say hi. She was talking to me at the time and I am not sure that she saw him come up on the couch but when he decided that he was going to climb onto her lap, she turned around and smacked him! It wasn't like a surprised jump/smack either, she looked at him and hit him off her lap. She had to hit him pretty hard too because he is a pretty solid cat. Needless to say I was not happy and I told her that if she couldn't respect my animals, I would like her to leave. I think I was pretty calm about the whole thing too considering what had just happened.

So everything is fine yesterday, then today, I have three emails and two voicemails from a combination of my "friends" (the ones I have in common with this girl) and a few people that I don't even know telling me that I am a horrible person basically and that what I did to so and so was totally wrong. I was called any number of names . . . one of the emails accuses me of liking my cats more then humans, I am VERY tempted to reply that yes, I do, and people like them are the reason why (this is one of the people I don't know).

Do you guys think I really overreacted? I honestly don't think I even raised my voice, I just walked to the door, opened it, and told her to leave.
 

zissou'smom

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If you were calm, asked her to leave, and didn't say anything personal about her, then I'd be tempted to say you under-reacted!

Seriously, if I saw somebody it Zissou I'd have a hard time not hitting them, and you can bet they'd be on their way out the door faster than they knew it.



My guess is, from the violent and immediate reaction you're getting, that she told everyone that she just pushed him gently off her lap and you flipped out at her.

Maybe the best way to deal with it is to explain your side of the story to the people you care about, and as for the ones who cursed at you and called you names, well, they've just shown you you're better off not knowing them.
 

cococat

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Good call showing her the way out of the door.
I don't think you overreacted at all. Your kitties would thank you if they could!
If you don't stand up for them, who will? Not that girl. Obviously not your "friends" either.
 

luvmy2cats

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OMG!!! There is no way you over reacted. I would've let loose with a string of curse words and told her to get the MEEP out of my house.
 

kimkats000

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Hit my cat, leave my house FOREVER! Don't even raise your voice to my cat let along your hand!

You are finding out who your TRUE friends are. I would call the ones who love your pets and let them know what REALLY happened. Kind of the "rest of the story" kind of thing!

Kim
 

sarahp

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Yep, I would be telling your friends what really happened, and finding out what she told them she reckons happened. Ask how they'd react if she hit their pet or child.
 
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calicoprincess

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Originally Posted by luvmycat1

OMG!!! There is no way you over reacted. I would've let loose with a string of curse words and told her to get the MEEP out of my house.
Oh trust me, that's what I REALLY wanted to do. Maybe it's from my debate and mock trial background through highschool, I'm not sure, but I am REALLY good about holding in my emotions when things get heated. I did however call my sister and a few of my other friends right after she left to vent about what had just happened. . . and then I gave Mercury some catnip, the result of which you guys may have seen in the pictures thread. . . He perked right up!

Oh and I just reread my post, I don't think I clarified something, she hit him IN THE HEAD, hard enough to knock him off her lap. She will NEVER be in my house again, and neither will any of my "friends" who can't understand why I asked her to leave.
 
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calicoprincess

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Originally Posted by kimkats000

Hit my cat, leave my house FOREVER! Don't even raise your voice to my cat let along your hand!

You are finding out who your TRUE friends are. I would call the ones who love your pets and let them know what REALLY happened. Kind of the "rest of the story" kind of thing!

Kim
I plan on calling a few of them, but I feel so attacked, and betrayed kind of really (I've known one of them since middle school) that I think I might have to wait till tomorrow when I will likely be more calm about the situation.
 

pjk5900

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You are completely justified in what you did.

I would've done the same but with a little boost to helping her out the door!
 

pjk5900

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Originally Posted by CalicoPrincess

I plan on calling a few of them, but I feel so attacked, and betrayed kind of really (I've known one of them since middle school) that I think I might have to wait till tomorrow when I will likely be more calm about the situation.
yes, I would wait a day or so too.

good luck!

with friends like those, who needs enemies?
 

okiron

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Dude, if I was in your shoes, I would've hit that person so hard teeth would've came flying out.
 

strange_wings

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Even if a person views your pets as your property, they should respect them and you. Or just have common respect for a living creature.

That said - if someone was mishandling my property that would be disrespectful to me. They'd be reprimanded and told if they didn't like it to leave.
Teasing/tauting my pets would get the person reprimanded - told to grow up, stop the behavior or leave.
Harming my pets, I'd probably tell them they have till the count of 3 to get the
out.


I think you handled it better than I might.
 

brandi

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Originally Posted by strange_wings

Even if a person views your pets as your property, they should respect them and you. Or just have common respect for a living creature.

That said - if someone was mishandling my property that would be disrespectful to me. They'd be reprimanded and told if they didn't like it to leave.
Teasing/tauting my pets would get the person reprimanded - told to grow up, stop the behavior or leave.
Harming my pets, I'd probably tell them they have till the count of 3 to get the
out.


I think you handled it better than I might.
I agree 100% I was reading an animal abuse post in this forum...I have told DH many times that if someone did that to one of my babies...Id probably stop them from breathing...that being said Id like to tell every one that for the first time in about 8 years I have PMS so we can call that my excuse
 

whiteforest

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I would have done the same thing! If someone can't respect my family, animal or human, they are not welcome because I'm not going to subject any of my family to that sort of treatment, especially in their own home!
 

natalie_ca

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No, I don't think you over reacted at all. She had no right to hit your cat. If she didn't want him on her lap she could have picked him up and put him on the floor.

She probably really embellished what happened and making what you said worse than what it was, as well as making her seem like she was Miss Nicey all the time.

With friends like her and the others who were texting you, you don't need enemies.

My advice to you is to write off all of those people from your life and find yourself some new friends!! I wouldn't have anything more to do with any of them if it were me.
 

strange_wings

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As I've said, who needs reality tv? There's all your drama right there.
 

hammyandwaf

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well you did not overreact you actually underreacted IMHO. Cause i am not normally a mean person but i tell ya what someone comes into my house who one is not a close friend, and they hit one of my animals the better expect to get the same in return from me. I dont hit my animals and I'll be daggone if someone else is going to do it and not get a treat for themselves in return. I am proud of you for taking it so well tho.
 

catsknowme

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Originally Posted by hammyandwaf

I am proud of you for taking it so well tho.
Yes, we are ALL very proud of you!!! Assaulting your pet cat, IMHO, is criminal. even if he was property, it would still be vandalism

Boy, it would be tempting to burn the black candle with her name on it
But I guess all I can do is pray for her since she has such an empty heart . You are well rid of her out of your life
 

miagi's_mommy

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I would have done the same but I would have not been as calm as you were! I'd throw her out the door!
 
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