Help!! 18 yr old Pursuing my 14 yr old!!!

tinkrbl5

TCS Member
Thread starter
Young Cat
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
76
Purraise
1
Location
Virginia
Someone please help. My daughter is 14 yrs old and we have an 18 yr old who will not stop texting her and calling her even though we have asked. My daughter says they are just friends even though the 18 yr old has more feelings than to just be friends. What can I do to stop this!! I have spoken to my daughter and explained that it is not appropriate for an 18 yr old and a 14 yr old to hang out and be friends when the 18 year old has other intentions. (Big crush has said the 14 yr old in a text I love you) Please Help Me!!!!!!!!!
 

ping

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 14, 2006
Messages
2,205
Purraise
2
Location
Ga
Whats the age of consent in your state? I would be calling the police if I were you.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #4

tinkrbl5

TCS Member
Thread starter
Young Cat
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
76
Purraise
1
Location
Virginia
I don't understand we live in Virginia. Can you explain???
 

ping

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 14, 2006
Messages
2,205
Purraise
2
Location
Ga
In other words what he wants is illegal. He is an adult she is a minor in the eyes of the law. If he is pursuing her and will not leave her alone get a restraining order against him.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #7

tinkrbl5

TCS Member
Thread starter
Young Cat
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
76
Purraise
1
Location
Virginia
Does this apply if the other person is the same sex? She is 18 appoaching my daughter that is 14. My daughter is very angry with me right now and said that they were only friends but I found info. on her phone and computer of this 18 yr old that are more than just friend communication. I expresses to my 14 yr old that the relationship is inappropriate and that I want it to stop now. I have contacted the 18 yr old and explained to her I felt the relationship is INAPPROPRIATE and do not call my daughter or email her becuz she will not be allowed to communicate any more.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #8

tinkrbl5

TCS Member
Thread starter
Young Cat
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
76
Purraise
1
Location
Virginia
By the way my daughter has told this girl she is not looking for a relationship with another girl becuz she really likes boys. The girl will not back off
 

sharky

TCS Member
Veteran
Joined
Jan 30, 2005
Messages
27,231
Purraise
38
CALL your local Police department and talk to one of the officers
 

ping

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 14, 2006
Messages
2,205
Purraise
2
Location
Ga
Originally Posted by tinkrbl5

Does this apply if the other person is the same sex? She is 18 appoaching my daughter that is 14. My daughter is very angry with me right now and said that they were only friends but I found info. on her phone and computer of this 18 yr old that are more than just friend communication. I expresses to my 14 yr old that the relationship is inappropriate and that I want it to stop now. I have contacted the 18 yr old and explained to her I felt the relationship is INAPPROPRIATE and do not call my daughter or email her becuz she will not be allowed to communicate any more.
Yes still applies. Please do your self a big favor and call the police. I can not stress this enough.
 

duchess15

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Nov 23, 2006
Messages
3,825
Purraise
14
Location
Wishing I were anywhere but here
Call the police ASAP and get a restraining order! The 18 yo sounds like she may be obsessed and stalk your daughter where ever she goes especially if she is already having problems of understanding what stay away means.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #13

tinkrbl5

TCS Member
Thread starter
Young Cat
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
76
Purraise
1
Location
Virginia
Thank you to all of you. I told the girl already once today that I did not want her contacting my daughter again. She text my daughter 2 messages about how she didn't like her but then after I text back acting like my daughter she sent a message saying that she LOVED her. So yeah this is stopping. I am calling the police and getting this taken care of ASAp. Thank you to everyone. !!!
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #15

tinkrbl5

TCS Member
Thread starter
Young Cat
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
76
Purraise
1
Location
Virginia
Good idea. I will do that. She doesn't have her phone now I took that away from her and I am not allowing her on the computer either except to do homework. I think by tomorrow afternoon this I hope will be taken care of. I am going to the school and letting the school know after I contact the police. This will stop. This 18 yr old will get the message.
 

trouts mom

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 4, 2006
Messages
23,949
Purraise
16
Location
Snowy Santa Land
Originally Posted by Natalie_ca

Take your daughters phone away for the time being, and then change the phone number so that this girl cannot text her.
Great idea Linda
That might be the only way..
 

butzie

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 22, 2007
Messages
5,299
Purraise
1
Location
Secret Santa Land
OK, I have a totally different perspective about this thread than the other posts, so this is IMO only.
In your first post, you did not say that the 18-year old was a girl too. Teenage girls are exploring their sexuality. Perhaps there are some same sex feelings on both sides. Maybe your daughter, when she says that she likes boys, is telling you what she knows that you want to hear.
You said that you talked to the girl. Did you talk to her parents? It seems to me that everyone is jumping to calling the police in without all the facts.
Please get some counseling so that you and your daughter can really talk. It might well save the 18 year old's record and your daughter some embarrassment.
I am a happily married heterosexual. I just think that we should listen to our children and stand by their choices.

Again, you are the Mom, just IMO.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #18

tinkrbl5

TCS Member
Thread starter
Young Cat
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
76
Purraise
1
Location
Virginia
Thank you again to everyone with your thoughts and ideas. I just wish my daughter wasn't so upset and understood why this is not a good situation. She just doesn't think that this 18 yr old is doing anything wrong. I am soo she is not allowed to go out at this age with anyone unless an adult is present.

Again, Thank you to everyone. I will keep you posted on what happens. I just want this girl to stay away from my baby girl.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #19

tinkrbl5

TCS Member
Thread starter
Young Cat
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Messages
76
Purraise
1
Location
Virginia
Butz -

The reason I didn't state the gender was becuz I am a very open individual. I was asking based off the fact that the other person pursuing this relationship is 18 That within itself to me is wrong. No matter if it is a guy or a girl. If my daughter was wanting to date a girl she will wait until she is 16 and she will date someone that is of the same age. Anyone that is 18 approaching a 14 I have to ask what are their intentions?
 

ping

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 14, 2006
Messages
2,205
Purraise
2
Location
Ga
Originally Posted by butzie

OK, I have a totally different perspective about this thread than the other posts, so this is IMO only.
In your first post, you did not say that the 18-year old was a girl too. Teenage girls are exploring their sexuality. Perhaps there are some same sex feelings on both sides. Maybe your daughter, when she says that she likes boys, is telling you what she knows that you want to hear.
You said that you talked to the girl. Did you talk to her parents? It seems to me that everyone is jumping to calling the police in without all the facts.
Please get some counseling so that you and your daughter can really talk. It might well save the 18 year old's record and your daughter some embarrassment.
I am a happily married heterosexual. I just think that we should listen to our children and stand by their choices.

Again, you are the Mom, just IMO.
IMO an 18 year old ,whether male or female, should not be chasing after a 14 proclaiming their love for them period.
 
Top