Our cats can't get along

I will try and provide as much history to our cats as I can:

I have a Tabby cat named Paul, about 3yr old male. My roommate has a black Tom cat (very long and thin) named Julien, roughly the same age, male. Julien has been my roommate's only owner. I am Paul's 3rd owner.

I received Paul because of a situation in which my friend in Minneapolis could not take care of him anymore. I drove him to Madison, WI, and eventually Cincinnati OH. I mention this because it's a stressful journey. Paul and I had the apartment to ourselves for a couple days until my new roommate moved in with her cat from Indianapolis. Julien lived with other cats in Indianapolis for several months.

Julien's initial reaction was hissing at Paul when he entered the apartment. Paul was intrigued. The cat's history: Julien traditionally doesn't hiss at other cats, and is the intrigued aggressor. Paul traditionally runs away from other cats and doesn't like them. Well the more Julien hissed at Paul overtime, the more Paul wanted to see Julien. Now the tables have turned, and Paul will tend to try and get to Julien to fight him. This requires us to separate the two of them all the time. Mostly they will try to get into the other's bedroom to explore, but otherwise it will be Julien getting to higher ground and Paul approaching him with issues resulting.

When one is locked in the room. the other will stand outside the bedroom door, and they both know they are there. Paul is more likely to do this, and he whines about it all the time in this case. But if they get too close, eventually they fight.

When Paul sees Julien, he gets low to the ground, and the whole tail wags a lot. Julien will slowly and pink panther like walk, rarely taking his eyes off of Julien. This is odd as the two could be sitting on opposite sides of the door for hours, and then they change moods when they see each other face to face. Paul will usually follow Julien, and after some time (5 min to 60 min) they fight.

Both of these cats are sweet hearts. Paul is much more excitable and runs. Julien is just as playful and funky in his personality. Essentially, these are good cats with really intriguing personalities. But this thing where we have to lock one in a room all day while we are out is annoying. Suggestions?

*I should note, there is never really bad agression with the two of them. Usually its very subtle walking around each other with one (usually Paul) making a move. Sometimes its Paul biting Julien's tale, and sometimes its the two of them smelling each other for several minutes before wrestling and screaming. Its been nearly 2 months with the two of them now.*

If they're not neutered, it's definitely time to do it and that alone will make lots of difference - they're doing their appropriate macho thing now after all, but will spray and stink up your place in time if not taken care of. If they are neutered, I can only suggest trying some Feliway (pheromone diffuser plug-in) and see if it helps.

I trust they're both neutered. If not, that will make the problem worse.

Ultimately, you may need to let them work out their heirarchy. It may be noisy, but with any luck, it won't be bloody. Before that, I'd trim their claws, both front and back, to decrease the chance for injury.

Our two cats did the same thing, essentially, when we brought the second one home. We kept them apart for just a few days. Now they get along just fine. Oh, they're not cuddle buddies, usually, but they play together all the time, dashing from one end of the house to the other, rolling around, making noise, even occasionally hissing. You'd think it was serious...if you didn't keep watching, and notice that they break up, and then go right back at it, just changing who is chasing who and who is jumping who.

No luck,

It's been nearly three months now. Lets elaborate a bit.

Julien is a very sweet cat (but i find him very "cat like" and I don't care for it). He gets active sometimes (usually with his owner, my roommate). He's very quiet and soft walking. When he gets locked in his room and wants out, he paws at the door loudly and quickly. God I hate it.

Paul is a funny cat. He's active, does the normal crazy cat sprints back and forth across the house, meows when he wants out of his room, gives love nibbles, and loves to be with people. He also fetches and drops on command.

Things aren't really getting better, and the biggest problem is my roommate is very defensive about Julien and I constantly have to defend Paul to her.

As a reiteration, Paul stalks Julien. He waits behind corners, and when Julien comes into view, he will sprint towards him. Luckily I usually see this and stop him. I will clap loudly, yell at him, spray water, hiss, or be nice and put him on my lap. He usually runs away and cowers in his/my room, knowing he's done bad, but ultimately that doesn't change anything. I'll lock him in his/my room, but usually letting him out will continue with the same. Sometimes they sit as far from each other in the house as possible, just staring. SOMETIMES they don't really do much of anything. Paul is definitely much more interested in getting into Julien's room than Julien getting into Paul's room. Although sometimes Julien does, and Paul gets much more upset about it. Julien is always walking slowly and carefully when Paul is watching him.

Paul never hisses or growls. Only Julien, and sometimes. Julien is usually the one that tries to find higher ground, and Paul will usually try to get to him, with Julien growling.

Paul's tail is almost always in full swing with Julien's tail hanging low.

Both are neutered.

I'm a dog guy, and I like Paul because he's interesting and social, and not cat like. But this is obnoxious and I'm losing patience.

Originally Posted by beatledud

He waits behind corners, and when Julien comes into view, he will sprint towards him.

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Sounds like normal cat play.

Did you try the Feliway? If not I recommend you do, and also get some Rescue Remedy to put in their water.

Believe you are and your roommate are making more of this then need be. If you haven't had the two rolling together locked in battle, they will work it out (much quicker if the human equation backs out of it.) You don't like the one cat's "cat like attitude?" Sounds like a perfectly natural reaction of a cat by your description. You can get annoyed with it if you want to, but the cat is acting on instinct and nothing else.

Stop yelling, clapping, spraying water doing all that and just let the cats find their way with each other. If they do happen to fight, use a straightback wooden chair and gently insert it into the middle of the fighting cats, or use a broom to gently pull them apart. But if you haven't had any emergency vet visits, it is going about normal for two cats now having to get along with each other because the two humans have demanded they should.

Originally Posted by mrblanche

I trust they're both neutered. If not, that will make the problem worse.

Ultimately, you may need to let them work out their heirarchy. It may be noisy, but with any luck, it won't be bloody. Before that, I'd trim their claws, both front and back, to decrease the chance for injury.

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Originally Posted by hissy

Believe you are and your roommate are making more of this then need be. If you haven't had the two rolling together locked in battle, they will work it out (much quicker if the human equation backs out of it.) You don't like the one cat's "cat like attitude?" Sounds like a perfectly natural reaction of a cat by your description. You can get annoyed with it if you want to, but the cat is acting on instinct and nothing else.

Stop yelling, clapping, spraying water doing all that and just let the cats find their way with each other. If they do happen to fight, use a straightback wooden chair and gently insert it into the middle of the fighting cats, or use a broom to gently pull them apart. But if you haven't had any emergency vet visits, it is going about normal for two cats now having to get along with each other because the two humans have demanded they should.

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follow the above advice and i'm sure all will be fine. good luck!

I also think that as you admit to not really liking cats for who they are to a great extent, that may be passing to the cats themselves and adding to the stress. You may like Paul for his uncat-like ways, but if he picks up on the feeling (as Julien might be - cats are far more sensitive than you may realize) that you only like 'some' of him, the parts he may even grow out of in time, it could make him nervous as well. I even believe you might want to rethink having a cat at all, or living where you are in the circumstances, as I'm worried you might express your dislike (certainly of Julien) in ways that are bad for the cats, and invite worse behavior, instead of appreciating them for themselves and working with that. Do you have to live there?