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post #31 of 49
Thread Starter 
I finally found him after some serious sluething. He was sleeping, oblivous to what I have been going through, a simple phone call would have been all it took.

I think flowers are in order.
post #32 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by mom2raven View Post
I finally found him after some serious sluething. He was sleeping, oblivous to what I have been going through, a simple phone call would have been all it took.

I think flowers are in order.
I think more than flowers are in order. Glad you found him though.
post #33 of 49
It would bother me too but I would rather him be sleeping over at a friend's place than driving home drunk.
post #34 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by mom2raven View Post
I finally found him after some serious sluething. He was sleeping, oblivous to what I have been going through, a simple phone call would have been all it took.

I think flowers are in order.
This deserves him taking care of the kids for a day and you having a fun day out.
post #35 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by katachtig View Post
This deserves him taking care of the kids for a day and you having a fun day out.
Seriously!!!!
post #36 of 49
It wouldn't bother me a bit if he called, but no contact, that is very bad
post #37 of 49
I'm not the jealous type, so no, it wouldn't bother me and that is based on past experience.

However, I would expect that he have the courtesy to call and let me know so that I don't stay up all night worrying if he was in a car accident and laying dead or dying on some road.

I would rather he stay over at a friend's house than risk his or the life of others by driving drunk.

The way I figure it is that if a guy is going to cheat he's going to cheat. If he does it's no reflection on me or anything that I did. Also I don't distrust until given reason to. However if a guy cheats on me once he doesn't have a second chance to do it again because I'm gone... and that is based on previous experience to.
post #38 of 49
Pffft too right it would bother me!. I wouldn't have an issue with him going out with his friends, but i would draw the line at staying out until the early hours or staying at his friends when he has a bed at home. He could have got a taxi home so theres no excuse, plus staying over at a friends house after a night out is something i did when i was 18/19.
post #39 of 49
I hope you give him an earful while he's completely hungover!!!! Not letting you know where he is, and having the car is SO wrong. I understand that by the time he realised he was too drunk to drive, he was probably too drunk to call you, but he definitely should have called before he got to that point.
post #40 of 49
Mine learned years ago not to do that without a call. We have an agreement, as long as he calls so I won't worry, I won't say a word, and if he wants, I will come and get him and any friends that need a way home. If they want to sleep on my couch, I will take them back to their vehicles the next morning. His friends thought he was just whipped until I got some of them home safely and with no fights the next morning. We have a couple of friends that I will go get even if they are not with him. He even calls me if he is going to be really late coming from work, which he often is. He can't leave in the middle of a tattoo, and it never fails a big, expensive one will come in to be done a short time before closing.
I agree with koodeez about the importance of time with your respective friends or alone. The longer we are together, the more important it becomes. I am afraid I still don't give him enough time, just out of habit, but am trying to get better about it. He is much easier to get along with when he has his alone time. He usually just sits at home playing his guitar, though.
It was really inconsiderate of him not to call or find another ride. Leaving someone stranded, especially with kids is a huge no no. I hope he has the mother of all hangovers.
post #41 of 49
One time the SO stayed out until 5:30AM, and he didn't call.
I was upset.

I told him that if he ever does that again, I'm going to prop a chair under the doorknob to keep him out, and he'll have to call and get an ear full to be let back in.

I'm sure he would not like if I were the one staying out without calling.
post #42 of 49
Alright he would be buying me more than flippin flowers!! I would expect alot after something like that... The last time someone pulled that BS on me, I put a gallon of water on the doorstep so it would freeze and he would slip, I put butter on the doornob so he couldn't open in, and threw his clothes in the lawn. When he finally got inside the house he told me "IM SORRY I LOVE YOU AND ILL NEVER DO IT AGAIN. He then puked everywhere. It was payday, I got into his wallet took his paycheck and cashed it and spent the whole thing. When he woke up I told him " IM SORRY, I LOVE YOU AND ILL NEVER DO THAT AGAIN" Seems like every man says those exact three things when they do something wrong... GRRR!

My DH tries to pull that crap with me all the time, he goes out gets drunk, then recently he's been trying to tell me "WELL I DONT KNOW IF IM GONNA MAKE IT HOME" And I tell him he better if he knows whats good for him! Then he tells me "WELL MY FRIENDS WILL MAKE ME STAY OUT" and I say you're a fully grown man who has the ability to make his own choices! With 3 kids you should have the car ALL the time! When he wants to go out, take him there and drop him off! Give him a couple bucks for a taxi!
post #43 of 49
hmm speaking as guy,
If he was going to drink tha tmuch, he should have called you to come get him.
post #44 of 49
Between B and I our concern foremost is safety. As long as one of us shows up before 11 AM the next day after a night of partying, we don't get too concerned about lack of phone calls...but that's just us. Phone calls are appreciated but not too necessary.

If he says he's going to call on the other hand and doesn't, then it doesn't bother me...
post #45 of 49
Rule 1: Don't drink and drive. Rule 2: Don't drink and drive...
post #46 of 49
rule 3: bring your butt home.
post #47 of 49
He should have stopped at home and had her take him over to the friend's house, or had a friend follow and drive him over after he dropped the car off. As others have said, leaving someone home with the kids and no car is bad.

And I would worry if my husband did that too, worry that he might have tried to drive home anyways and could have wrecked. A phone call only takes a couple of minutes.

Were I in the original poster's situation - My DH would be in the ER getting a shoe removed from you know where.
post #48 of 49
i never had that happen when i was married to my x husband, but the guy i dated before i met hammy did it all the time. first it started out only on the weekends then it happened during the week. Needless to say i left him and moved two counties away.
post #49 of 49
Yeah, I'd be mad. My husband doesn't do that kind of stuff, but I had a few ex-bfs that did. It's called a phone - learn how to use it. Plus, if there was a party, I'd want to be invited!
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