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Radar's a wimp

post #1 of 9
Thread Starter 
Let me start by saying that there's been no fighting between the boys, just the usual dominance posturing and slapping, nothing more serious than that.

But Radar has decided that he is bottom of the pecking order, and has taken up residence on the bookcases. He made early advances of friendship towards Jacob but was rebuffed, he's now decided that Jacob is bigger and can slap harder, and Jacob seems to take great delight in chasing him off and swatting him when he comes near.

Radar will come down when Jacob is in quiet mode or asleep, has his cuddles, even lies down on the sofa in his usual place near us and near the boys - but when Jacob is active and playful he takes to the heights of the top shelves and his favourite hidey holes amongst the books to avoid him.

The main problem is that mealtimes have become an issue and that's when he's most likely to hide! Jacob appears to be a little anxious when it comes to food, he is used to being free fed but I don't do that because of Sonic the little pig and the vet's raised eyebrows the last time he weighed him. At mealtimes the others both avoid Jacob, and I feed him in a separate room. But this morning Radar wouldn't come down off the bookcases even though I shut Jacob in the kitchen to eat, I had to put his bowl on a shelf

I'm not hugely worried, in that it's good that Radar has his places where he feels safe and comfortable, he still comes down to play and get attention, and it's somewhat normal in a multicat household to have submissive and dominant individuals. I'm just looking for opinions really as to whether I am treating it the right way ie. letting them get on with it as there's no fighting, and giving Radar plenty of attention when he emerges and making sure he gets enough food in an area where he's not going to be chased away from his bowl etc.
post #2 of 9
Would you come down off the bookcase if someone brought your bowl to you? This is a slippery slope, and don't let him con you into feeling sorry for him and treating him that way. I do get it about Jacob, etc, but it will quickly get out of hand that way and you need to maybe feed Radar separately but not on your books!
post #3 of 9
I'm still feeding Penny separately, and I may start doing that for Ferris as well, since Max appears to think that shouldering his way into someone else's food dish - and then blocking ALL the food dishes with his body is the right thing to do.

I just had to start up a 2nd dry food dish in a different spot as well - Max can't block two food dishes in separate places at the same time!

Slippery slope, well, yeah, maybe, but it's my responsibility to make sure that they are ALL well fed and loved, not just the alphas. If that means I have to cater a little, well, yeah...they have me wrapped around their little paws.
post #4 of 9
Thread Starter 
Er... as far as I'm concerned if Radar wants to eat on the bookcase he can eat on the bookcase - what is more important here, that my cat gets enough to eat, or that he might spill food on my books? I'm not going to let the others bully him away from his food just because he's a lover not a fighter. I sometimes wonder why I bother asking
post #5 of 9
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by GingersMom View Post
I'm still feeding Penny separately, and I may start doing that for Ferris as well, since Max appears to think that shouldering his way into someone else's food dish - and then blocking ALL the food dishes with his body is the right thing to do.

I just had to start up a 2nd dry food dish in a different spot as well - Max can't block two food dishes in separate places at the same time!

Slippery slope, well, yeah, maybe, but it's my responsibility to make sure that they are ALL well fed and loved, not just the alphas. If that means I have to cater a little, well, yeah...they have me wrapped around their little paws.
Cheers, I was wondering whether to try free feeding at the weekend when I'm around to see who's eating what and to see whether it eases Jacob's tensions, but feeding seperately long term isn't a problem. Radar's naturally a very little cat and he's a perfect weight at the moment so I don't want him losing any.
post #6 of 9
I personally don't see any problem with you feeding him on the bookcase, but I would maybe try to get him to come down before you actually deliver his food and if he does, fawn over him a bit. I'm sure that once Jacob gets more comfortable with you guys he won't be as anxious about the food and eventually the dynamics between the boys will settle down and Radar will come down from his lofty perch
post #7 of 9
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by katiemae1277 View Post
I personally don't see any problem with you feeding him on the bookcase, but I would maybe try to get him to come down before you actually deliver his food and if he does, fawn over him a bit. I'm sure that once Jacob gets more comfortable with you guys he won't be as anxious about the food and eventually the dynamics between the boys will settle down and Radar will come down from his lofty perch
I think you're right. It is just taking Jacob longer to adjust to scheduled mealtimes than it did Sonic, he's only been here just over a week and change of surroundings too. Radar is coming down for normal activities whenever Jacob is calm, of course Jacob is least calm when there is food around so Radar won't come down for food. I'm sure it will settle down given some time. I just feel a bit sorry for Radar because he was so keen to be friends with Jacob and just looked confused when Jacob didn't want to know. Jacob and Sonic get on well, and Radar and Sonic get on well, and Radar wants to get on well with Jacob!
post #8 of 9
I suppose that it doesn't hurt to feed Radar up high now, but my main concern would be that Radar may not use the litter pan. You'd better keep an eye open for that and be sure he's not being intiminated or refusing to come down and pee (especially)!

I feel sorry for Radar - being part rex, I'd favor and spoil him more
post #9 of 9
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by GoldenKitty45 View Post
I suppose that it doesn't hurt to feed Radar up high now, but my main concern would be that Radar may not use the litter pan. You'd better keep an eye open for that and be sure he's not being intiminated or refusing to come down and pee (especially)!

I feel sorry for Radar - being part rex, I'd favor and spoil him more
Oh Radar still spends a lot of time off the bookcases and we have a litter tray nearby them anyway - it's only when Jacob's running around like a nutter that he disappears. Like right now. It's 20 minutes til kitty dinner time and Jacob is wailing like a banshee and making his presence felt. I'm trying not to give in and feed them early, I think varying the routine at this point would be counterproductive.

And Radar is very much loved and fussed over - the one part of his personality that isn't rex-like is that he's not very cuddly, he'd rather be near you than on you, but we give him attention in other ways

EDIT: One thing I neglected to mention is that the bookcases have always been Radar's special little retreat when he wants some 'me' time, it's not like he's been chased somewhere he doesn't enjoy sitting anyway. He's just such a gentle soul I honestly think he gives off 'bully me' vibes, other cats can tell just by looking at him that he's not got it in him to even hiss or growl at them
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